1/17/11

Coming

Feeling Susanne's own hand come to the side of his face. Her touch was soft and warm. Giving a little smile that it was ok Chuck tilts his head into her touch again as she ran her hand a long his face and through his hair. It was soft, light and it had been a long time since Chuck had felt a tenderness like this from a woman.

"Mmm..."

Chuck couldn't help the small happy sound that came from his lips. He felt very content in this moment now and he wouldn't change it for anything. It might have been a rough start but Chuck was sure things would go ok now.

"I'd really like it that you would want to come. I think you would have a blast, and I know my church would really enjoy getting to know another sister in Christ."

He couldn't help but feel his heart race a little bit. He was excited to know Susanne wanted to come, and that she would be able to meet his church family. They were such nice people he new for sure they would lover her.

Finishing off his sub and taking another sip of his water Chuck can't help but smile a little bit bigger. The night was turning out so well Chuck was pleased.

"I am glad you don't think I am repulsive. If it means anything, I don't think your silly, or a ninny. I think your wonderful the way you are."

Going back to Jason while Cindy wanted to call Angel and than Rick Katie just waited with him. Keeping her hand rested with his is was the only thing she could do to feel his warmth to just feeling. It wasn't the same but it was all she could do.

Pulling into the driveway Angel moves fast waving for Dan to follow her. Everyone else was busy with there family's right now and though she knows they would be more than willing to help she didn't want to bother them. She'd just need him to help carry Jason so it wouldn't be to much.

Knocking on the door and than entering at Cindy's voice Angel gives her a smile Dan following close behind. Moving into the living room Angel bends down to where Katie was and lays a soft hand on her shoulder and a smile before moving to Jason and checking his vitles quick before turning to Dan.

"Ok Dan, we are just going to take is nice and slow. Katie I want you to sit in the back and keep Jason's head in your lap. Cindy, if you want to come you are more than welcome too. Wendy already said if you needed someone to be with Kaylee you could bring her over there."

Slowly and carefully Angel, Katie, and Dan move Jason into the car Katie getting in and setting Jason's head in her lap. Softly running her hand through his hair, and keeping her other hand locked with his.

Before getting into the car with them Angel looks back to Cindy with question not sure if she wanted to come or not. Angel thought it might be best if she did so she to could be with Jason but it was her choose.

1/16/11

Timid

An invite to go with Chuck? Though it brought on a little bit of fear, there was a warm feeling that Susanne liked. Would him actually wanting to be around her always make her feel so good, or would it wear off? She wouldn't mind if the feeling was always there. No man had ever paid attention to her. This feeling was... worth keeping.

As Chuck reaches over to brush away the strand of hair and his fingers glide across her cheek, Susanne can feel her heart begin to race. Staring into his eyes, she wonders if it was disappointment or relief she felt that he had retreated.

She'd never felt things like this before... it was a scary thrill, almost like a riding a rollercoaster. But looking into those never-ending eyes... she felt a strange urge to let him know she was okay... that she wouldn't slap him away. Lifting her hand, she slowly stretches it out until her fingertips lightly brush his face, almost mimicking his own movements. She withdraws quickly, her gaze turning to one of asking permission - it felt rather silly, but at the same time, it was something she wanted to do.

Swallowing hard, her hand moves forward again until her palm is resting against his cheek. Her eyes roam to every curve and line, studying his face as her thumb moves past his mouth to touch his lips, down to his chin, then up again. Her fingers wander to trace under his eyes, up to his forehead then down his hairline by his ear to follow his jawline. His skin under her touch sent tingles up her arm and her fingers wander down his neck and around to his hair in the back, then up through his hair to his face again. When her palm rests on his cheek where it had started, her eyes look into his once more and her lips curl into a little smile, even though she's blushing.

"I... I think I'd like to go on one of those trips with you," she responds softly... timidly. Her hand slowly moves back to her own lap and her eyes finally drop. "I don't find you repulsive in the least."


Hearing Katie, Cindy turns around in the kitchen, doing her best not to panic. Jason wasn't waking up? It was what she'd feared. Though she wanted to trust Katie, at this point, she was going to go with her gut instead.

"No... I'd rather call Angel now. I don't want to prolong it if there's something really wrong." She turns off the stove and goes for the phone. "Keep trying though," she prompts. "Maybe you can rouse him by the time Angel comes."

Picking up the phone, she calls Angel to let her know what was happening and what Rick had told her about moving Jason and putting him on an IV. And after hanging up, she calls TJY. Getting the answering service, she knew it was late, so she dials his home phone instead. How she remembered it, she didn't know. She remembered a lot of things from the good old days of living near TJY. It felt like a lifetime ago. "Rick, I'm so sorry to call you at home."

"Cindy? No, no, it's okay. What's up?"

"Katie can't wake Jason. I already called Angel and told her what you said so we're going to move him if Katie still can't get him up."

Rick sighs deeply. This wasn't good. Jason had been very tired after attacks before, but never had he been to the point of not waking up. This really had been a bad one. "Okay." He speaks calmly and gently. "You're doing the right thing. As long as he's resting, that's a good thing, okay? It means his body is trying to recuperate."

Cindy tries to hold on to his assurance. "Okay."

"All Angel needs to do is make sure he remains stable and get some fluids into him. He's probably dehydrated, but I'm sure she'll see that."

"What if... what if he still doesn't wake up?"

"Don't worry about a thing. Jason is going to be alright. I promised you things would be fine - I still mean it. Now... I'm going to pack my things, grab some stuff from the office, and fly a jet down tomorrow. If anything changes, you just call my cell phone, okay?"

"Okay. But... but why are you coming? What can you do here?"

"Oh, I just want to talk with Angel a little and see how Jason's doing. I've got a bit more information than she does about what's been happening with Jason, and it's easier to relate in person than over the phone."

Cindy swallows hard. "No, you're just worried about him and it's your last ditch effort to do something that probably won't be any different than Angel."

"Cindy... What I told you was true. There's no last ditch efforts here at all. The fact that Jason is asleep is good, okay? Trust me." All Rick had said was true. But it was also true that he wanted to see Jason for himself and make sure he ended back up in Nevada in one piece. He trusted Angel and he trusted Katie. But he'd been looking after Jason for a long time and wasn't about to leave him now. "Remember - call my cell phone if anything changes. Otherwise, I'll see you tomorrow."

"Alright." Cindy sees headlights reflecting through the window and knows someone has arrived. "Someone's here now. Thank you, Rick."

"Goodnight, Cindy."

Moo...Moon light?

Looking up at Cindy hearing her voice and feeling her hand rest on her arm Katie gives her a small nod. Her eyes were still tired, and lacked some of the spark that was normally there but maybe it was just from being drained still.

"Ok I'll see what I can do."

Once Cindy was gone Katie shifted a little bit on the couch but kept Jason's head in her lap. Looking down at his still form watching him sleep it was so very strange not to be able to feel his emotions, to know if he was really ok, if he was in pain or what was going on inside him. In a way is scared Katie even more not knowing than if she did. She still hated the feeling of being normal, but she had done what she thought was best.

"J...your mom is making some soup. Try and wake up? J..babe..."

Giving Jason's arm a gentile shake Katie waited to see if Jason movies, but not seeing him move hear him Katie could feel her heart pick up a little. Cindy had told her what Rick said made Katie worried, and feeling Jason was ok...was worse.

Moving slowly and setting Jason's head down on the couch. Leaning down she gives Jason a kiss on the forehead. It made her very nervous that he didn't wake but Katie new she had to keep her cool. Even if her emotions couldn't cause any harm to anyone else she still new to be level headed.

"Cindy, I couldn't get Jason to wake. He's still breathing normally and everything but he's in a really sound sleep. I can try again in a little while, and if still nothing we can bring him to Angel ok?"

Katie tried to stay calm though there was worry in her eyes. What was to come, or was happening now was uncertain and to not be able to see that was something she feared more than anything else. What if she could of been helping Jason right now? Had she done the right thing? She could only hope.

Listing to Susanne and some of the stuff she liked to so Chuck didn't find her boring only much different from himself, But that wasn't a bad thing. Sometimes liking things that were different was a good thing and a good way to do new things.

Cocking his head a little bit Chuck's eyes give a twinkle in the dull light. He felt at peace right now, comfortable and happy. It was nice eating with Susanne even after all the strange encounters.

"Well...maybe one time you can come on a bike trip with me, and in return you can show me your rose bushes. As for being lonely...we all get lonely but as long as your don't fine me to repulsive I can help fill that empty time for both of us."

Reaching out to Susanne Chuck pushes a peace of stray hair out of her face as he continues to smile. Her skin was soft under his fingertips. Realizing he let his hand linger longer than he had intended Chuck pulls it away. Susanne had just started opening up he didn't want to scare her away already.

Do you think you can?

Cindy nods, hoping she hadn't insulted Angel in any way. She understood that Jason and Katie were "normal" now, but... what about the physical trauma Jason had just endured? What if he really was sick or hurt from this? They were just going to leave them there? Maybe Angel was right... but Cindy really would feel better calling Rick. If they both had the same opinion, she would feel better. She trusted them both.

"Okay. Thank you, Angel." She really did mean it. She was thankful Angel had come. "I'll call Rick to let him know what happened and I'll keep an eye on Jason and Katie."

Once Angel left, Cindy looks in on the two for a moment before heading for the study once again. She remembered the email she'd written Wes just an hour or so before. Now there was more to worry about. Sighing, she picks up the phone and dials the TJY infirmary.

"Rick? It's Cindy Henson."

"Cindy! How good to hear from you."

"Thank you. Unfortunately, this isn't a pleasant call."

"Oh? What's wrong?"

Cindy bites her lip. "It's Jason. He had another attack."

"What? How? When? Is he okay?"

"He's okay right now," she assures. "Katie is here with him and Angel came too. Katie, she... she had Angel give them the antidote so Jason could rest."

"Wow. I quit suggesting that because Katie resisted it so strongly. I'm glad they did that though. Must have been a pretty bad episode."

"It... it was. That's why I'm calling. Angel was here and checked them over but...I don't know. I trust her, Rick. But she doesn't have the equipment TJY has either. Jason, he was... he was shaking so bad and throwing up."

"You think he was having seizures?"

"Well, I'm no doctor, but that's what it looked like to me. He was in an awful lot of pain, Rick. I know you were worried about internal damage... I just can't see how there was no damage caused by this one." Cindy's voice cracks. "It was horrible."

"It's okay," Rick assures soothingly. He could hear it in Cindy's voice that she was scared and worried. "He's made it through a lot of things - he can make it through this too. You said he was resting now?"

"Yes. I think he ended up passing out. Katie's helping keep him comfortable - I think she's pretty worn out too."

Rick lets a pause linger as he thinks. "I'm sure she is. They're at your place or at Angel's?"

"Here. At the house. Why?"

"I just want you to keep an eye on them. Be sure you and/or Katie try to wake him at some point - preferably no later than tonight to try and get some nourishment in him. If he was throwing up, I doubt he has much left to give him any strength and he's going to need it."

Cindy swallows hard. "What if... what if we can't wake him?"

"That's what I'm afraid of - but he may be just fine. If he wakes up, give him some clear liquids and keep him quiet. With the antidote, he'll have no risk of any more attacks right now - it's just getting his physical strength back."

"And if we can't wake him?"

Rick hesitates. That really was what he was afraid of. If Jason had indeed passed out, he might be unconscious for longer than was good. "Then you have him taken to Angel's and have her put him on an IV to give him nourishment. Then call me."

"Okay." Cindy's hands shook a little as she held the phone, fearing the worst. "Thank you."

"Oh, and one more thing."

"Yes?"

"Take care of yourself too." Rick's voice was calm and gentle. "I know you're worried, but just try to relax. Everything will be fine. I promise."


...Throughout the day, Cindy does her best to not worry, but it was nearly impossible. She takes care of Kaylee, finishes cleaning the living room and does some laundry to keep herself busy. She checks in on Katie and Jason often, making sure Katie was comfortable and wishing she could do more.

By nightfall, Rick's words played over and over in her mind. Jason still had not woken. What if there really was damage? What if there was brain damage or something? Or some other internal damage they couldn't see?

Returning to the living room, she bends and rests a hand on Katie's arm. "Honey... I'm going to get a little soup ready for supper, if you want anything. We need to try and wake Jason up too." She'd already told Katie of her phone conversation with Rick - she thought it was only right to keep her informed. After all, Katie was a bigger part of this than anyone. "Do you think you can try to do that while I'm in the kitchen?"


Susanne eats slowly, just letting herself enjoy this time. Maybe after telling off Dana, she was finally ready to try this. Maybe that little spark of determination had triggered what she really needed to be brave and start relaxing around Chuck. Maybe, just maybe something had changed today.

Listening to Chuck as she eats, she wonders what it would be like to go with Chuck on one of the road trips with his group from church. Or even go to a bike show with him. She'd never been interested in one before... and maybe it wasn't her hobby, but to do it with Chuck might be interesting. She wondered what it would be like to watch him as he played the keyboard and sang. She'd heard both on the CD tonight, but she could imagine watching him, doing something he was obviously passionate about. Her own hobbies were so different... but she did love music.

Chuck's final statement though, makes her eyes widen a little. "Oh, stop it." She gives his leg a backhanded slap. "My face can't stand to get any more red than it already has. You're cruel."

She does smile a little though before she takes another bite of sandwich to hide it. "Your life sounds peaceful," she muses. "Mine seems rather chaotic at the moment, with work and all." She sighs. "Sometimes I wish I wasn't a part of the Elite. Then I remember why I signed on in the first place and I end up continuing the crazy rat race."

She shrugs and takes a sip of her water then finishes off her sandwich. "My twittering birds and thorny rosebushes keep me company in the quiet hours, so I guess away from work it's no so chaotic. It does get..." She stops herself before saying it and gives Chuck a sidelong glance. "I guess it does get rather lonely," she finally admits. "Me being so bullheaded and a ninny when it comes to men hasn't helped matters, I suppose." She rolls her eyes. "As if you haven't noticed."

Feeling her cheeks growing warm again, she focuses on her bottle of water, feeling as though she'd just spoiled the moment.

A few times

Looking at Cindy Angel did feel bad for her. She new this must be very scary and she couldn't imagine if it was her own daughter how she would react. The Agency was cruel, and even if they weren't bothering the family's right now there mark was still present.

Resting a hand on Cindy's arm again Angel gives a small smile. Some might take what she said as an insult that Angel didn't know her job but Angel didn't take it that way at all. Rick did now a little more about this than she did.

"From my knowledge there isn't anything else that can be done. The antidote has been administered and thats the best thing right now. Katie is still with Jason so he'll be ok right now...they are normal. But you still might want to call Rick and let him know what happened."

Angel gives Cindy another reassured smile. It was all she had to offer right now. Angel had never seen it this bed before except when Jason use to have his nightmares. But he'd over come them and this was something completely different but it would be ok, at least for now.

Looking out at the water Chuck study's the colors as they dance across the water. It was so tranquil and thats why Chuck liked it here. The soft sounds to the water, the birds calling there goodnight, and the colors that God painted the sky with.

Hearing Susanne's question Chuck looks to her again chewing his food. Once gone he gives a smile. His life was pretty dull but he liked that Susanne was now trying to get to know him better.

"Well at my chuck we have a group of men and women with bikes and once a month we do a outing where we just drive and where we end up, we end up. Its really fun, and we get to witness t people a long the way."

Taking another bit of his sub and following it up with a sip of his water Chuck straightens for a few moments before sitting relaxed again.

" I like doing to motorcycle shows, and I listen to a lot of music. In my off time I liked to sing and play keyboard and guitar as well. Other than that, I sit at home watch tv or there is this woman I have grown fond of I've seen a few times now too."

Still worried

Jason had no awareness of the others in the room, being moved to the couch or being checked over by Angel. His emotions were calm, but there was no telling what was backbuilding below the surface.

His subconscious seems to sense some kind of brief, minor pain on his skin but it's quickly gone, followed by a rather chilled sensation. The lights were being turned out, but it wasn't bad. There was something missing... something being drained... but not something to be feared. His body seems to relax even more, now able to concentrate on healing rather than fighting off raging emotions.


Watching from a few feet away, Cindy's tears continue their silent route down her cheeks. It had been a very long time since she had been this frightened, and a very long time since she had worried about Jason on this level. And to think that it had all started with the Agency, tagging Derek and Jeff without them even knowing it, hoping for their offspring to be made into lab rats. It made Cindy livid. Her son was suffering in more ways than one, all because of the Agency and she hated them even more.

Going to the kitchen, she gathers a few cleaning supplies and returns to the living room to clean up the mess, trying to keep her hands busy, even though her eyes kept blurring over. Sniffing and wiping her eyes with her sleeve, she sits on her knees and stares at the half-cleaned mess, then over to Jason's still form.

Getting up again, she goes to Angel in the hallway, trying to remain composed. "Thank you for coming," she manages while wiping her eyes again. "Between you and Katie, it looks like he'll be okay." She sniffs and wraps her arms around herself. "I've never seen him like this though... before Katie got here, it was awful. I think... I think he was having seizures. Do you think Rick should come?" She searches Angel's eyes, still so worried. "Heaven knows I trust you, but if Rick has any more information or... or.... the equipment at TJY, or..." She bites her lip. Was she grasping at straws, or did something else really need to be done? She didn't know.


Hanging on tightly to Chuck, Susanne leans her head against his back and closes her eyes as they head down the road. The brief stop to get their food is only a quick pause in the ride and by the time they reach the pond, she'd had her eyes open half the time and was quite proud of it.

Joining Chuck on the blanket, she sits carefully and looks out that dimming sky that was dark purple, streaked with warm shades of gold. It was pretty on the pond. Peaceful. After the rough start with Chuck earlier, one might think by now Susanne would be beside herself with fear. But she wasn't. Looking over at him as he sat with her, she offers a little smile. No, she wasn't afraid... not really. A little nervous still, but not like she had been. She was glad she'd come.

Nodding her consent, she thanks God for the meal and also for the time with Chuck and his patience with her. After her "amen," she gives Chuck a sheepish little grin and reaches for her sandwich so she doesn't fidget.

"Thank you for bringing me here," she mentions quietly. "It really is pretty." She glances around their surroundings before her eyes find their way back to Chuck's face. "You've told me all about your niece... but surely you have other people in your life. What do you do when your niece is out and you've closed up shop for the night?"

1/15/11

Please

Feeling tired herself Katie didn't give up not yet on taking the emotions from Jason. She would rest once he was ok, that was her main concern and worry right now. Knowing her would be ok was important.

Opening her eyes again as Cindy came close Katie wanted her to go again but she held her tong. This was her son she couldn't tell her not to be here right now.

I love you too Jason. Easy does it...everything is going to be ok.

Feeling Jason's body relax Katie opens her eyes slowly as she see Angel come into the room. Giving her a little nod she looks down to Cindy for a moment just studying her worried face. This was new to her, she'd never seen it before and Katie couldn't look past the worry in her eye.

"He's ok Cindy, He's just sleeping. Let him sleep for now, he needs it. Can you get us a blanket please?"

Katie new she would be staying right on the couch for now. She needed to be close to Jason just to be close.

Laying a hand on Cindy's shoulder Angel gives a smile and a nod. Katie new what she was doing and if Jason wasn't ok she wouldn't try to hide it. She trusted Katie more than anything with Jason.

"Its ok Cindy, I'll look Jason and Katie both over."

Coming closer to them both Angel gives a small nod to Katie as a good job. She always found her so strong o be able to handle something like this. Angel wondered if she would be or not herself?

"Ya did good Kate."

Checking Jason's vittles and than Katie Angel was sure they would be ok but were vary tired. It was odd to see them both whipped out like this so she would keep a mental note on it.

Starting to put her stuff again Angel stops as Katie starts to shift a little just getting comfortable. Opening her eyes and looking down at Angel Katie had her own conflict going on inside her now. She wanted Jason to be at peace, he needed it, but at the same time she had her own needs and he was hard to choose. But Katie new in her heart what to do.

"Angel, I want you to inject Jason and I. He needs some rest without emotions, and pulls running through him. He needs to truly rest in peace right now. Please Angel I am asking you to do this for Jason."

Looking up at Katie and just studying her for a long moment Angel was surprised by her request but in a moment she saw how grown up Katie had really become. She was willing right now to push her own needs away for Jason. It was honorable, and very mature.

"Ok, Kate."

Going pack into her bag and pulling out some needles along with the antidotes Angel makes it quick and painless administrating it. Once done Angel cleans up again and leave Katie and Jason rest for now.

Getting on the bike and making sure Susanne was as well Chuck stops before pushing his helmet down. Looking over his shoulder he gives a smile to Susanne. Resting his hand on top of her for a moment he just loved the warm feeling of her arms wrapped around him.

"Mystery, What is a book if you already know the ending, just another book. But a book with a new ending is one worth reading again."

Pulling his helmet down Chuck starts the bike and heads out. Making one quick stop for some subs along with chips and some water to go along with it they were both off again. Wising past the buildings the warm night air moving over there skin.

Getting to the lake that was lite dimly Chuck pulls the bike into the same spot as before and turns the bike off. Opening the sack on the side he pulls out a nicly wrapped blanket and lays it out on the ground a long with the food before offering to help Susanne sit. Sitting next to her he gives another smile.

"Would you do the honor of saying grace?"

1/14/11

Peaceful

Seeing Katie, there's a small amount of relief that greets Cindy, though she was far from being over her worry. "Oh, Katie..."

She didn't very much like leaving Jason in Katie's hands, but she knew it was best... that was just about the extent of her knowledge, but it was all she had to go on. So as Katie slips down and takes her place, she moves out of the way, ignoring the rug burn she'd received on her hands from trying to hold Jason still.

Being told what to do, she nods, tears still streaming down her face as she trembles. Getting to her feet, she goes to the kitchen to fill a glass of water, then goes to Jason's room to try and find the pills.


Jason doesn't respond at first to Katie's presence. Completely void of control or even knowing where he was, he throws up again in the midst of a violent fit. His emotions were off the charts. Everything hurt, the pain sending him in and out of consciousness. He didn't even know that he was thrashing about while anybody tried to keep him calm. His mind was one big blur of confusion - so much so that he wasn't even sure it was real.

It doesn't take Cindy long to return to the living room and slide down on the floor again, this time with the glass of water and sugar pills. Getting either into Jason though, proved an impossible task. After several attempts and him spitting it all back up again, it seemed the effort was pointless.

Completely soaked with sweat, Jason's breathing was rapid and shallow, his pulse racing. Then gradually, there was a little ray of hope - so small and so faint that he could barely see it, but it was there. It was there as the only lifeline he had. And somewhere in this dark, swirling vortex was a strange pocket of peace, far away from reality.

His fingers tighten around Katie's hand - a survival instinct, but he felt her warm comfort and heard her soothing voice. He could feel the emotions racing towards her in a torrent - an unstoppable river. And somehow, somewhere the words find their way through.

I don't know what's happening to me, Katie. But no matter what happens, stay strong.
While his body shakes and his eyes roll back in his head, caught in another onslaught of physical trauma, he forces his communication to remain open.

I can't... can't hang on. I love you, Katie.
His grip on her hand tightens.
You're my light.

And without warning, everything comes to a screeching halt. Blacking out, his body grows still, his fingers releasing Katie's hand. His emotional onslaught is reduced to a normal level. The only emotions left are provided in a slow, quiet stream as peaceful as if he was sleeping soundly.

His sudden halt in thrashing, sends Cindy's heart racing even faster. "Jason?" She tries to wake him with no response. "Jason... please..." Fresh tears surface and she looks to Katie then shakily checks his pulse. Though it was weak, she's relieved it's there. "Oh, Jason." She sniffs and puts her hands over her mouth, feeling utterly helpless. "Don't go, please," she whispers. Surely Angel would be there soon and would be able to help, right? He would wake up... right?

Suddenly hearing crying down the hall, Cindy is torn. But she knew she could do nothing more here - Katie was all Jason needed right now. Kaylee, on the other hand, needed attention as well. So getting up once more, Cindy leaves the living room to see to her daughter, praying as she went.


Susanne really wishes her face couldn't get any redder and her eyes roam to the floor as she bites her lower lip. She wasn't sure why she felt like laughing - maybe because this whole thing now seemed absolutely absurd... again.

Moving to pick up her purse and jacket, she then eyes Chuck's arm. Looking up at him, then back down, she reaches out a bit hesitantly but then links her arm with his. It was warm. Strong. And as they walked across the main floor, she felt herself drawing just a little bit closer to him.

Getting outside, the evening air felt nice. Susanne wouldn't need a jacket but for the motorcycle ride. Nearing the bike, she felt a little tingle of fear. Or was it excitement? She grins a little and slips on her jacket before taking the spare helmet. Glancing up at Chuck, she shakes her head. "You're a mystery, Chuck... I'll give you that."


"Yeah, I guess." Alec wasn't really convinced that Carson would ever like him, but he tries to shrug it off. It really didn't matter anyway, right? Who cared? So Carson didn't like him. So what?

Shoving the whole topic aside, Alec grins at Ryan before flopping onto his back and pulling her down too so she was on top of him. Kissing her warmly, he tucks some of her hair behind her ear. "You've turned my world upside down, Ryan McKade. And I'll have you know that you're the only woman who's ever done that."

Stable

Having started her day early Katie leans against one of the fences at the ranch. Just watching the horses as they were out in the field. It had been a quiet more, and knowing Jason was up she hadn't bothered him. Last night she felt a little discomfort from him but with the new he was bringing to his mom how could he not be like that. So She tryed not to worry and just let him have his time with her.

On receiving his first message Katie had already been able to tell something was wrong. She could tell Jason wasn't feeling all that well and it worried her just a little.

Ok, I'm here J.

Taking a slow pas she made her way down the lane twords Cindy and Wes house. If by time she got there Jason was feeling fine, and everything was ok Katie could turn around and some back leaving his mom and him to there visit. But Katie would want to make sure for herself he was ok.

Getting about half way Katie is hit with a strong wave of pain that for a moment send her to her knees as she holds her head. This wasn't good, this wasn't good at all. A million and one emotions were pushed at her all at once. Struggling to get to her feel Katie new she had to, Something was terrible wrong and she had to get to Jason.

Walking quickly she soon broke out into a run twords the house keeping her own pain and emotions in check. She had to get there as fast as she could.

Picking up the phone and hearing Cindy's paniced voice on the other end Angel was already up and getting a bag together with several different things along with some of the antidote Rick had sent to her in case anything happens while Jason or Katie where here.

"I'm not sure where Katie is Cindy, but I can promise you she is on her way now knowing something is wrong. Hang in there, I am on my way as well ok?"

Hanging up the phone Angel takes she bad and leaves the office heading to the house she gives Luke a bref over view on what was going on so he didn't worry where she was. Than heading to her own car she makes her way out there.

Not even knocking on the door Katie opens it and than closes it behind her. Her breath heavy from running she comes over to where Jason was. She wished she could say hi to Cnidy but there really was no time for that now.

Looking to her she lifts Jason's head just a little bit before slipping beside her on the couch she new she was worried, but having her here might make matters worse. It was hard to contill her own powers when this was going on. But if Katie kept her moving back and forth it should be ok.

"Cindy I need you to go get me a glass of water, and than try and find Jason's sugar pills for me please."

Drawing her attachen back to Jason Katie rests her on hand on top of his, and her other runs through his hair. Just letting his emotions come to her.

I'm here Jason, I'm here. Just try to relax and let your feelings go. You're going to be ok.

Katie lets a soft hum from from her lips and she just continues to try and console Jason, to get him to calm down and just let his emotions go. She had to at least get him stable for now.

Please come

The night was full of tossing and turning and nightmares that hadn't bothered Jason in some time, even going back to memories of prison. He shuts most of them out though - his habitual reaction to keeping Katie from suffering from sleeplessness as well. Kaylee's crying woke him up early and by six o'clock he was nowhere near ready to get up but sleep wasn't going to come anymore.

Sitting at the table half-asleep even after his shower, Jason looks up as Cindy brings him a cup of coffee to add to his glass of orange juice. "Mmm... thanks."

She smiles and runs a hand through his damp hair. "You're welcome. You look like you need it this morning." She returns to the counter to pour herself her own cup then makes sure Kaylee is content in the living room before coming back to the kitchen table and sitting with Jason. "I've um... been thinking a lot about last night."

Jason nods slowly. "Me too."

"And I've... I've decided that I want to see Trey."

Jason had been afraid of that, and he doesn't raise his eyes. Instead, he concentrates on his coffee, gently blowing the steam from the cup. "You know he might not react well."

"I know." Cindy sighs. "But the Agency took my rights away from me, and I'll not let them win." She purses her lips stubbornly. "Trey might not want anything to do with me. But if I don't make an effort, what kind of mother does that make me? I have a duty, whether I knew him all his life or not."

Jason wished he felt better about the idea. He wished he could support his mom wholeheartedly, understanding her point of view. But instead, all he felt was a new churn of emotions. He just didn't like any of this. "Do you... really want to, or do you just feel obligated?"

Cindy cocks her head, finding it difficult to read her son's face. "I want to."

"Okay. Then I'll... talk to Reese when I get home and set up a time."

It was an odd kind of pause that followed and Cindy grew more concerned for whatever it was that Jason was feeling. "Do you want any breakfast?"

"Nah." He downs the rest of his orange juice then follows up with some more of his coffee before he rises from the table. "I think I'm gonna take a little walk. I'll be back in a while."

Cindy doesn't stop him, but simply watches as he puts his shoes on and leaves the house. After cleaning a few dishes and moving to the study for a while, she found herself sitting at her computer and wiping away another tear. She stared at the half-written email. Sometimes Wes could reply right away and sometimes she went days and even weeks without hearing from him. She never knew where he was or when she'd hear from him again - she'd received a letter just a couple days ago, but that didn't mean he was still there and still okay. It didn't stop her from writing him her emails though, always ending them with hugs and kisses. Today's email, however, was much different than the ones that were usually filled with talk of Kaylee and her misadventures.

My dearest Wes,
Jason is here for a visit. It's so good to see him again. You know how I always miss him horribly and how I worry so. This time though, he came with some news that was quite shocking. At first, I didn't want to believe it, but he told me about the evidence and even though it seems impossible, it appears to be the truth. There's no easy way for me to say this,

Cindy's fingers hover over her keyboard again. How was she suppose to tell her husband that she had another son? She knew Wes loved her and was usually easy-going, but would he be upset about this? Would he believe that she'd been unaware of a second son?

Taking a deep breath, she begins typing again.

so please be patient as I try to sort through it. Jason has informed me that he has a twin brother - that I have a second son. It's TJY's belief that he was abducted directly after birth, then sold into their adoption racket. I was never aware of his existence whatsoever. It seems his upbringing has not been pleasant and he is now in the custody of TJY in Nevada. I'm still unsure how to feel and I won't lie - I wish you were here to hold me as I cry.

She wipes another tear and sniffs. She didn't want to make Wes feel badly, but she did want him to know she still needed him.

I've decided that I want to meet Trey, though Jason has his reservations. I'm not sure when I'll be able to, but it might be soon. I have no idea the outcome of this decision, but I believe it's the right thing to do. Pray for me, Wes. I need all the strength I can get.

I will write again soon. Be safe. I love you so much.
Cindy
xo xo xo


Getting out in the fresh morning air felt good. Ambling down the dirt lane, Jason kicks at a few pebbles, just letting his mind wander. Why this whole thing bothered him so much, he wasn't sure. It didn't feel good though, nor did withholding some of those feelings from Katie. He just wanted to mull them over himself first before sharing them. Unfortunately, it was somewhat painful. He used to be able to hold off anything he wanted without trouble. But lately it felt as though he were losing more and more control over his emotions. He'd been so close to conquering them and controlling them - and now they were getting the best of him again.

Sighing, Jason feels a small wave of dizziness and regrets not having eaten any breakfast. His rise in emotions wasn't doing any good for his blood sugar, but he tries to push it aside. He'd had some orange juice - that should have been more than enough for several hours.

Finding a spot in the grass off the path, he eases down under a tree and leans his head back against the rough bark. Fishing in his pocket for the sugar pills he'd promised Rick he'd always carry, his fingers meet only a piece of lint. Great. They must be in his jeans from yesterday.

Moving to get up again, his legs wobble but after a moment, he finds his balance. Maybe he should head back to the house. He hadn't thought he'd walked that far... but the walk back seemed to take longer. Stopping halfway, he puts a hand to his head as a searing pain shoots through his skull. Wincing, he tries to shake it off. What was happening to him?

Hey, Katie...
He hadn't even said good morning to her, not knowing if she was up yet, but he'd have to skip over pleasantries for now.
Not feeling so hot. I... think I'm okay but... but just in case, keep alert, okay?

He does manage to make it back to the house, though he had to stop several times to get over his dizziness. As soon as he enters and Cindy sees him, she knows something is wrong.

"Jason... are you okay?" She comes to him quickly, giving him support as he sways towards the wall. "What is it? What's wrong?"

He shakes his head. "Not sure. Just... not sure. Um..." He tries to think straight, but it isn't easy.

Katie? Um... alkdfjrew-idkfjskakz

His emotions skew and distort, sending mixed signals instead of the words he was trying to form. Forcing his legs to work, he makes it to the living room with the aid of his mom. But that was all his body would give. As his legs give out on him, he's too heavy for Cindy to support, and he collapses on the living room floor. His body begins to shake violently, his palm starting to burn.

"Jason!" Cindy kneels next to him, not understanding what was happening.

Clenching his fist shut, Jason curls up into a tight ball. "Get... get Kaylee... get her out of here," he gasps.

"But what-"

"Do it!" he barks.

Scared, Cindy flinches but does as she's told. By now, Kaylee is crying and Cindy struggles to get her down the hall and to her room. Coming back alone, she's met with sparks and one of the lamps bursting into a million pieces. She shrieks and jumps back, shielding her face. Overcoming her fear, she slides down next to Jason again, setting a hand on him as he shakes. She instinctively knew that this was not an everyday occurrence - this was something to do with his emotions, but she'd never seen him like this before and it terrified her. "Jase... what do you need, Jason? I can't help you if I don't know."

Jason cries out as the pain surges through his entire body. Sweat pours from him, immediately soaking his clothing. Every muscle seems to tighten and cramp, shaking uncontrollably.

"Katie." Cindy goes for the phone, but Jason stops her.

"She... she already knows."

Of course. Cindy felt silly for thinking Katie didn't know about this. Did that mean she was on her way? Probably. But Cindy couldn't just stand here and watch her son suffer. Going to the kitchen, she quickly retrieves a cool washcloth and comes to kneel with him again, setting his head in her lap. Wiping his sweat away, she was sure it wasn't doing any good at all, but she hoped it brought a little bit of comfort anyway. As Jason's shaking grows worse though, tears stream from her eyes. Seeing him in so much pain was heart-wrenching.

As Jason convulses and starts to throw up, Cindy tries to hold up his head while trying to keep the rest of him still. Her strength was little compared to his though, and she struggles, confused and scared, waiting for Katie to come. Any mess could be cleaned up - right now, she feared for her son's well-being.

Panicking on the inside, she reaches for the phone again while remaining on the floor with Jason. Her fingers shake as she dials while her other arm tries to keep Jason still. Waiting for an answer, a prayer is mumbling on her lips. "Angel? Oh, Angel, thank God. It's Cindy. I... I don't know what's happening... Jason said Katie's coming, but I don't know if she is and I don't know what to do. He's in trouble, Angel." She chokes on a sob. "Please help... please come."

1/13/11

Think about it

Hearing Susanne Chuck's grin grows even more. It was funny listing to Susanne tell off her friend but at the same time he got a glimpse of the Susanne kicking butt the first day outside his shop again. That was the Susanne he new inside.

Continuing to listen Chuck couldn't help but laugh. It was funny seeing Susanne open up like this, and even funnier to hear her friends reaction. He tryed his best to keep his laughter down but he just couldn't help it. Once Susanne hangs up the phone Chuck shakes his head his eyes twinkling even more with the laughter that had come first.

"That sure was telling her."

Not wanting to bring to much attachen to it making Susanne feel embarrassed or uncomfortable Chuck just leaves it alone though the humor still plays in his eyes. Susanne did something to him. He couldn't explain it other than it was something good and he liked it.

"Alright, I'm ready to go as well. I even remembered my extra helmet."

Holding his arm for Susanne he wanted wondering if she would take a hold or not. He might be a little rough on the outside but he was a big softy who did have manors.

"Oh, and you can stop saying sorry. It's ok really and you were hardly that bad."

Leaning in even closer to Alec as he explains what happened Ryan shifts a little so she was now sitting longways in Alec's lap and could look up at him a little better. Looking into his eyes Ryan could see how much this really did bother him.

"He's probably just not use to the whole thing Alec. One day he will be, I guess it just takes longer for some. After being in the Agency himself its probably just hard for him to trust anyone that was part of it."

Looking out twords the water herself it makes Ryan think of her own brother for a moment. She hadn't seen John in so long she couldn't help but wonder if he felt like Alec did. She'd never even tried to go see him. Maybe...maybe she should.

Bringing her mind back to Alec Ryan lets out a small sigh. She wished things could be ok for him. It was odd to see him down and it made her sad, she just wished everything could work out for him and he could know his family.

"Misty, she likes you right? Thats a start and I am sure Carson will come around. I mean he has to sooner or later when he see you have changed."

Katie can't help but smile as she lets BJ slip to the ground before turning to her dad. She new he'd be surprised to see her seeing as they didn't tell anyone they were coming out.

"Hey Dad. Jason wanted to come out see his mom so I tagged along. Figured you all wouldn't mind seeing me again."

"Mind, we don't see enough of you anymore. This will always be your home Katie. Come sit and eat, than we want to hear about everything thats been going on."

Rosetta smiles at her niece as she motions her to come and sit at the table. There was an empty spot next to BJ, and across from her dad with much food to go around for everyone.

Sitting at her desk the folder still in front of her Stacy looks down at all the information about the R/M ranch. It felt good to be see for all she had done, and to have the chief talk highly of her it was flattering.

But this was something she would have to think about, and something she would have to talk to her daughter about. She didn't have to worry about changing school, Ashlee already was home schooled and a very good student on top of it. If anything going to the ranch would help her get out there and do more things without Stacy having to worry about her to much. This could even give her a chance to spend more time with her daughter.

Tonight she would talk to Ashlee and see what she thought about it all. Her daughter was a big part of her life, and it was not only her life changing, but Ashlee's as well. To not ask her what she thought would be to disregard her all together. She told Chief Brown in a few days she would have her answer, and in a few she would. But for now she had to get to work, and move on with the day.

1/12/11

One minute

Susanne keeps her back turned, not really sure how to respond. She can't help a little laugh, muffled by her hand at Chuck's comment of kicking his butt. Sniffing and turning around, she looks at him again, even more sheepish than before. "Oh, Chuck..."

She shakes her head and takes a step forward to pick up the CD and look at it. Wiping her eyes with her sleeve, she sniffs again. "I don't know how a woman could ever think badly of you. You are... Prince Charming... in a leather jacket."

Laughing at herself, she the sighs and looks up at him once more. "I just told you over the phone that it was over. I don't understand why you don't give up. You're even more stubborn than my boss."

Taking a couple more steps forward, she nears Chuck until she's just a foot or two away. Her heart was pounding so loudly she figured he could hear it, and her face was so hot, she figured it might burn up right there. His words about this being her own decision and letting others choose for her, hit harder than she thought it might. She wanted so badly to go with him... was it really that bad of a decision? She could tell him no over the phone, but not to his face. I just didn't seem possible.

"I... I'll... I..." Her eyes drop as her heart and mind battled it out. "I'd love to go with you," she admits softly. There. She'd said it. But there was one more thing.

"But... but wait just one minute." Moving to her phone, she dials a number, putting it on speaker phone. If Chuck heard the entire call, he might understand a little more why she'd been so hesitant this past week.

"Hello?"

"Hi, Darlene, it's me."

"Sue! Hi. What's up?"

Susanne crosses her arms. "I just wanted to tell you a little something. You see, Chuck is here, asking me out on a date tonight."

"Oh, Sue... what did you tell him?"

"Well, remember all those things you told me? About how he was probably no good? How he was probably just after one thing?"

"Of course. He'll still break your heart, you know that."

Susanne sighs. Though there was a part of her that still wanted to listen... it was time she lived. "Right. And you remember everything - all the little warnings and advice during our last couple calls?"

"Well, yes."

Susanne nods. "Could you do me a little favor?"

"Um... sure, I think. What is it?"

"Take everything you can remember about that... and stick it all in your ear."

"Wha-"

Susanne hangs up on the call, cutting off Darlene mid-word. She takes a deep breath and lets it out slowly, looking back over to Chuck. "Well now... I feel better." She manages an embarrassed kind of smile. "We can go now... if... if you really... really mean it."

Looking back up at him, she tries to believe him, she really does. "And I'll try to be more civil with you. I'm... I'm sorry for the way I've acted."


Alec doesn't answer Ryan for a long time. He felt rather silly to let the whole thing bother him. He really did need to forget about it. What had happened to him that he'd let something like this get to him anyway?

He sighs and kisses Ryan's cheek, tightening his arms around her just a little more. "Carson threw me out of the restaurant today. I just had a delivery for him and I needed some lunch. But his daughter was there again... Mackenzie."

His eyes squint at the sun reflecting off the lake water. It had been a strange stirring in his heart when he'd seen his niece again. It was something he didn't recognize, but it somehow made him feel weak.

"He didn't want me around 'his family.' So... I guess I just need to forget about it. I guess being a half brother isn't a brother at all."


As the door opens and Katie enters, greeted by the others, Dylan looks up from his book. Everyone around here liked her. He couldn't think of anyone ever saying anything bad about her. It was a little strange, thinking of her as his cousin. But he supposed she was, even if it wasn't by blood. He wondered what it must feel like, being liked by everyone here and missed when she was gone. They might be cousins by marriage but they might as well be strangers. Going back to his quiet supper and schoolwork, he lets the activity go on around him.


Seeing Katie, Mick smiles warmly, especially when he sees how excited BJ is. The boy loved his family and Mick liked it that way. He might not have a "normal" home setting, but he was surrounded by love and that's what Mick wanted for him. He throws Katie a wink and a wave, glad to see her too. She'd grown into a sweet young woman who was welcome here any time.


"Katie!" Jeff stands from a nearby table, his smile a wide one. He didn't know why she was here, and he and Trent had seen her several days ago, but it didn't matter - he was always glad to see her. A surprise visit was the best.


Jason drives down the lonely little lane, away from the ranch and around the bend. As the familiar house comes into view, he felt a strange little pang in his heart. Even though he hadn't grown up here, it did feel like home. And even though he wasn't a hundred percent comfortable with Wes being his stepfather, without him here would seem rather strange. Parking in the driveway and walking up to the door, he knocks, hearing soft footsteps inside. He hoped he hadn't come at a bad time, and that his mom would be okay with a surprise visit like this.

Cindy takes one last glance in the living room to make sure Kaylee was staying put with her blocks, before she hurries to the door. Odd. It was rare anyone stopped by this far out, and usually anyone from the ranch called first.

Opening the door and realizing who it was, her face immediately breaks into a huge smile. "Jason!" Reaching out, she doesn't even stop to think before taking him into a hug.

Jason grins and returns the hug, giving her an extra tight squeeze and even a kiss to the top of her head. "Hi, Mom."

She draws back, still beaming. "What are you doing here? Why didn't you call?" Searching his eyes for a moment, her smile fades just a little. "Is anything wrong?"

"I..." Jason forces himself to keep smiling as he takes her hands. "I wanted to surprise you. Had some vacation time built up so... here I am."

"Well come in, come in." Cindy backs off so Jason can come in with his duffel bag.

"Ja!!!"

Jason glances down just in time to catch Kaylee who had tried running but had wound up falling headlong towards his legs instead. Sweeping her up into the air, Jason spins her around. "Kaylee! My goodness, you're getting heavy."

Kaylee giggles and squeals, hanging on for dear life as she's swung around.

Jason laughs at her reaction. "Something tells me you're used to this. I bet Daddy swings you around, doesn't he?"

Kaylee giggles again and points to the living room. "Daddy!"

Jason quirks an eyebrow. "In the living room?"

Cindy grins and shakes her head. "No, but a picture of him is. She drags that thing all over the house. I finally had to have a copy made and I put it in a cheap frame so she could bang into things and drool on it all she wanted."

Jason chuckles and goes to set Kaylee down but she shrieks and clings to his arms. "No!"

Surprised, Jason lets her stay. "Well okay then."

"I think she missed you." Cindy sets a loving hand on his arm. "So have I."

"I've missed you guys too." Jason sighs deeply, doing his best to keep a lid on some of his emotions for Katie's sake. This was his rollercoaster ride - he didn't want her to have to deal with it all at once like he was, especially when he knew she was back at the ranch trying to have a good time.

It wasn't until after supper and Kaylee was put down for the night that Jason and Cindy really had a chance to talk. Sitting in the living room though, silence seemed to have more of a presence than planned.

Cindy takes a sip of her hot tea and cocks her head, studying her son's faraway look. "What's wrong, Jase?"

Jason looks to her quickly, offering a wry grin. "That obvious?"

"You kidding? I'm your mother. It doesn't have to be obvious."

Jason chuckles softly and leans back in the corner of the couch, just watching his mother at the other end for several moments. He was glad they'd always stayed close. Even after his abduction when he'd been distant, somehow they'd managed to keep a close relationship. "I guess I'm just trying to figure out how to tell you what I came to say and I just don't know how."

Cindy tries not to become too worried, but it wasn't easy. Her fingers tighten a little around her cup of tea. "Are you okay? Are you sick?"

"No... no, it's nothing like that."

"Well, Rick said you hadn't been doing well with your-"

"Rick?"

Cindy nods slowly, giving him a look of love. "He's called me a few times to let me know how you are. He admitted he's been a little worried about you and some of the bouts you've had lately."

"Oh." At this point, that really seemed a trite subject. It might normally have upset Jason to know that Rick was telling his mother these things, but tonight it just didn't seem important enough to get upset. "Well, no... it's not about me... directly anyway."

Cindy waits but after several long moments, she prompts him. "So what is it, Hun? You know you can tell me anything." She wasn't used to him having a hard time talking to her. It wasn't like him at all. "Is it Katie? Something about the two of you?"

"No." Jason almost laughs. "We're really good, actually. Closer than ever."

"I'm glad to hear that." She smiles. "I always liked Katie."

"Mm-hmm." Jason pulls his knees up on the couch as he sits sideways, and folds his hands, still trying to figure out how to say things.

"Come on, Jason... just say whatever it is. I'm ready."

She wasn't. She couldn't be, and Jason knew it. No one could ever be ready for something like this. He had to tell her though. It was only right. He bites his lip and looks her in the eye, finally giving in, while at the same time, ensuring this conversation was private as far as his emotions went. "There's a guy at TJY right now... he's Angelica's cousin... well, adopted cousin, from Mexico now, though he was born in the US. He um... well, his adoptive family is involved with drug dealing. They got scared for his life so they sent him to Nevada. TJY agreed to keep him in custody for a while until things blew over or whatever."

Cindy listened, but her brow was furrowed, confused as to what any of this had to do with her.

Jason goes on. "Rick was... filing blood samples or something and... saw something odd in Trey's blood. Something... familiar. So he and Misty did some more tests and..." How could he even say it? His emotions started to bubble again, and his palm began to burn. Clenching his fist shut, he closes his eyes for a moment, taking a deep breath. He couldn't have an episode... not here, not now.

Cindy watches her son with new worry and she sets her tea aside, reaching over to lay a hand on his. "It's okay." At this point, she was already fearing the worst, though she couldn't imagine what it was. "You can tell me whatever it is."

How? Jason swallows hard and opens his eyes again. "Do you... remember when I was born?"

Taken completely by surprise, Cindy blinks and sits back in her corner again. "Well... as much as I can, yes. I mean, I remember the experience. Why?"

"Do you remember there being anything odd? Anything like something you weren't being told or... or anything like that?"

"I... don't think so." Cindy shakes her head. "I was in labor for several hours... they put me under... when I woke up, there you were." She blinks again. "I don't understand."

"Neither do I." Jason sighs. "But the only logical answer right now is the Agency. No answers to why yet, but it's the only thing we can come up with."

"The Agency? You being born? A guy from Mexico?" Cindy tries not to seem too confused, but she was. "Can we start over?"

Jason shakes his head. Moving closer to her, he takes both her hands in his and bravely returns his gaze to her eyes. "The blood test that Rick and Misty did..." His breath seems to catch in his throat and a silent prayer is uttered in his mind. "It... it proved that Trey... that Trey and I... we're... we're twins."

Cindy's heart leaps into her throat and for several moments she forgets to breathe. Her eyes are as wide as saucers as her face begins to pale. She could barely feel Jason's hands on hers. If it were anyone else, under any other circumstances, she would have laughed and called them crazy. But she knew Jason too well for that. "How?" she whispers. "What... I... I don't understand. That's impossible."

"We think the Agency abducted Trey at the hospital when we were born. Maybe all it was was their adoption racket - he did get adopted to that family in Mexico. I was just... the lucky one that got to stay with you."

"Twins?" Cindy retrieves one of her hands and puts it to her forehead. She felt quite dizzy all of a sudden.

"Mom... Mom?" Jason moves closer only to see Cindy's eyes roll back in her head. Scooting off the couch and kneeling in front of her, he rubs her hands, still talking to her. "It's okay... you're okay, I'm okay... can you hear me?" Tears form in his eyes as his emotions churn even more. Realizing his palm was against her skin, he jerks back quickly before he injures her. Frustrated and angry, he goes to the kitchen to retrieve a cool cloth, returning to see her already coming to. He puts the cloth to her forehead anyway and makes her sit still for several moments.

Cindy would have felt quite foolish, had she still not been in shock. "I... I don't know what to say."

"Neither do I."

"Twins..." She shakes her head numbly and waits for Jason to remove the cool cloth. "I..."

Feeling utterly helpless, Jason sits on the couch with her again, his face revealing all of his worry and heartache. "I'm sorry... I wish there was an easier way to say it."

"No... no it's not your fault. I just... I never would have..." She'd been carrying twins all those months? All those months she'd read stories and hummed to her unborn child... she'd really been carrying two? And when she'd held Jason in the hospital and looked at him for the very first time... there had been another? Then a thought strikes her and her eyes widen even more. "Does Derek know?"

"We don't know, but we doubt it." Jason purses his lips. "We don't think anybody knew."

"Then how did the Agency know? I mean, I never had one doctor's visit... how did they know?"

Jason tries to keep his tears at bay. The anguish on his mother's face was enough to tear his heart out. "Maybe they would have just taken me if I'd been the only one."

That thought alone sent a tear trickling down Cindy's face. To think of life without Jason... It had been bad enough when he'd been taken from her as a boy, lost for a year... but to think of never seeing him grow up at all... She sniffs as another tear emerges. "Is he... Trey... I mean... what kind of a man is he?"

Jason sighs. He didn't like Trey at all. His attitude stunk, and he'd been running with drug dealers all his life. What kind of a man did that make him? "He's... a little rough around the edges."

Cindy can tell that Jason is making it sound better than perhaps it really was. As more tears come, she reaches behind her for a tissue. But dabbing her eyes didn't do much good. Just crying for several moments, she finally sniffs and looks back to Jason again. "Does he know?"

"Yes and no. Pete told him they found his birth mother and a brother but... he didn't want to know any more than that."

Cindy nods. "I suppose I wouldn't either. If I knew I had a brother who had a better life than me, I'd probably wind up bitter, too."

Jason quirks an eyebrow. He hadn't really thought of it that way before. A new respect for his mother was growing. She took no offense at Trey not wanting to know who she was - Jason would have though she'd be upset over that. "Yeah... I guess so."

Taking a deep breath and letting it out slowly, Cindy dabs her eyes again. "Well... this is all... rather exciting." Feeling a bit foolish, she manages a laugh to which Jason laughs too. "I just um... I don't know what to do now. I can't believe the Agency had their claws in so early... leaving me with only half of what was mine." She grits her teeth in anger. "Someday, Jason... someday they will pay."

"I know." Jason reaches out and takes her hand once again. "They will."

Cindy takes another few moments of quiet, trying to settle her nerves. What could she do now? She had another son. It was almost too much to believe. What did he look like? What did he sound like? Had he been taken care of as a child? Was he happy? Was he safe? Leaning back in the couch, she sighs. "Does he look like you?"

"A little. We're not identical though." Thank goodness for that. Jason inwardly rolls his eyes. It was bad enough knowing Trey was his brother - at least he didn't have to walk around looking like him too.

"You know I can't just... just ignore all of this, right?"

"What do you mean?"

"I can't just ignore my other son. Now that I know he exists... it wouldn't be right, would it?"

Jason can feel a new sort of emotion starting to rise. Poor Katie was probably going mad, feeling just bits and pieces without him allowing the whole situation to be clear. He tucks a little bit of the emotions away still not allowing her to receive a full dose. He knew she'd understand.

Thinking about his mother's question, he shrugs. "I don't know."

"Well, that's what Derek did to you, wasn't it?"

Jason cringes a little. Yeah, he remembered the hurt and anger he'd felt, learning the truth that his father had known of his existence yet had never tried to contact him. It hadn't been a good feeling. But Trey was different! He was cold-blooded and cocky without respect for anyone. Maybe getting knocked down a peg or two was what he needed, not a hug from his mommy.

Glancing up, Jason meets Cindy's eyes that make him feel guilty for his thoughts. "I got what you're saying."

Cindy nods, but lets that thought be for now. She wasn't even sure what she intended to do. "Thank you... for telling me, Jason. I know this probably isn't easy for you."

"It's... a bit hard," he admits. "But I guess me finding out I have a brother can't be worse than you finding out you have another son."

"Hey." Cindy takes his hand. "You can't just ignore how you feel."

"Oh trust me." Jason rolls his eyes. "I can't ignore my feelings."

Cindy chuckles. "I guess you're right. But what I mean is, just because you view my time tougher than yours, doesn't mean your own feelings aren't valid. Yes, this is hard for me and I'm gonna be in shock for a while. But it's hard for you too. Just promise me you'll take time to work through things too, okay?"

"I will," he promises. "I will."

By the time Jason went to bed, it was quite late. He fiddled with one of his guitars for a little while, softly strumming and unknowingly putting Kaylee to sleep down the hall. It helped calm his nerves a little bit too, but not enough to sleep well. Later as he lay awake in bed, he stares up at the ceiling, watching the shadows of tree branches dancing on the ceiling, cast in front of the moonlight.

He couldn't tell if Katie was still up or not. She might have been tired enough to hit the sack, or she could have stayed up late with the others. If she was asleep, he didn't want to wake her. And if she was up with the others, he didn't want to bother her.

So instead of sending her a clear message, he simply sends along some warm, loving emotions - his way of saying goodnight. And rolling onto his side, he tried to get some sleep, despite how uncomfortable his negative emotions were.


"Thanks for coming in, Stacy." Chief Brown leans forward on his desk, fiddling with a pen in his hands. "Have a seat." He gestures for his officer to sit in one of the empty chairs on the other side of his desk.

"You may or may not know that I have been keeping my eye on personnel files of various officers for the possibility of nomination for the Elite. Obviously, the need only the best anyone has to offer as they often times deal with cases where the utmost skill is required. You also may or may not know that your file is one that I've been watching closely."

He reaches for some papers and lets his eyes scan them again. "You've had high marks ever since the Academy. You've done very well on cases you've been involved with, as well as serving with good judgment on the streets." A little grin sneaks out. "I see that you've also gained the highest number of tickets on the highway than many of our other officers."

Setting the papers aside again, he takes a deep breath, letting it out slowly. "But I haven't called you in here only for a pat on the back. I have an offer for you. It's unique, and I am not going to pressure you one way or the other - I'm going to leave it completely up to you."

He pauses again, thinking as he studies her. "Your name is, in fact, on a short list that I did send to the Elite for recommendations. They've been undergoing a lot of adjustments lately and are still dealing with a flux of workload and agents and therefore have not yet taken advantage of adding to their team. However, a recent situation came up that caught Chief Reese's attention. There is... a ranch... in Texas."

Brown reaches to the other side of him for a file on the R/M Ranch and hands it over for Stacy to see. "It's your run-of-the-mill horse ranch, but on top of that, it's a ranch for those in need, or troubled individuals in need of guidance. It's run by a family - well, two families, actually, combined by marriage and by common ground. The heads of the families have battled with the Agency for almost as long as they can remember - you may or may not be familiar with the tactics and brutality of the Agency, for which the Elite was started in the first place."

He leans back in his chair, taking a moment to straighten out his thoughts. "Reese has told me that while there have been no direct attacks to the ranch for quite a while, and though the Elite has removed a lookout post, apparently a young man - the ranch owner's son - has been tagged by the Agency and may well be in danger of manipulation, or worse. It seems he tangled with the Agency not all that long ago, not realizing that's who it was." He waves a hand in the air. "That's a very long story in itself, the details of which you don't need to know at this point. The bottom line is that those at the ranch fear they cannot keep a good enough watch while doing their day-to-day tasks and taking care of their families. Reese has recommended to them that they accept a security guard that can help keep an eye on things and do the worrying for them."

Brown folds his arms, still studying Stacy. "Whoever takes the job will be transferred to the Elite, becoming one of their agents in their own ranking system, regardless of previous law enforcement rank. They will be stationed at the ranch to live and act as a security guard. Allowances will be made for daily living, of course, but their main duty will be frequent checks of the grounds and keeping a good eye out for anything suspicious. They'll be required to sign on for at least a year, after which time they may choose to stay, should the Elite desire it, or request a transfer, at which time they may be replaced by a new security guard."

It was all official talk, and all taking way too much time, even though it had to be said. Brown sighs, giving Stacy a knowing look. "You know I'm asking if you would like this position. But like I said, I won't pressure you. I know that you have to think about your daughter too, and I don't know if you'd want her living on the ranch or not, or living near a risk of Agency involvement. The only problem is that I'll need an answer fairly soon. The ranch wants an agent as soon as possible, and Reese is trying to make it happen within the next month. I know that's very short notice as far as moving arrangements go, so please understand that whoever takes the position will be assisted by the Elite, for transportation, moving expenses and the like."

He leans forward again to rest his elbows back on his desk. "And if you want more than just the basic facts that are in that file, just ask. You'll have to be interviewed by Reese himself anyway, should you accept, and I'm sure he'd have many more answers than I would." He shrugs. "That's about it."

A Chance

Chuck can't help but chuckle again. Not as how Susanne but at the thoughts that passed through his mind. She was so cute and innocent to this all he couldn't help but just feel that much closer to him.

"You scared you will make me more miserable? Trust me, I've seen my share of women who make me miserable and your definitely not one of them, even if we don't work out."

Shifting his weight for a moment Chuck looks down at the cd he was still holding. He new Susanne was scared of how she felt, he could see it in her eyes. He didn't want to push and make it worse, but he didn't want to back away either. It was a mixed emotion that was hard to figure out what one was right.

"You don't have to be miserable you know, your letting other choose that for you, along with yourself. It's your life and you can take controlle of it. I've left that ball in you court. All I want...it just a chance. A true, honest chance to show you, I'm not a bad guy. If I was I think you might of kicked my butt already and trust me I know you can, I've seen you in action."

Taking a few steps forward Chuck sets the cd down on the desk and takes a few more steps back. Sticking his hands in his pockets he stands quiet for a long moment. What had drawn him to Susanne other than her good look there was just something about her. She had a lot locked inside and maybe thats what he had sensed.

"As much as I'd like to ask you to dinner by the pond on this nice night now, I really did just want to give you the cd. So if you'd like me to leave now so you can get back to work, I can."

Cruel mixture

Seeing Chuck coming over to her, Susanne shrank back a little further. As he appeared in the doorway, she swallowed hard and could hardly look up at him. Her cheeks burned so badly, she though for sure she must be as red as a tomato. That thought simply made it worse.

Her eyes move down to the CD for a moment. He'd out it together... for her? He wanted her to have a CD of him singing? Her? Too timid to take it yet, her gaze moves up to meet his eyes and her insides seemed to melt all over again.

Terror coursed through her veins - but it wasn't a fear of him. No, she was not scared of him in the least. She was simply scared of her own feelings and things she'd never experienced before. It was something she wanted so badly yet was so afraid of at the same time - a cruel mixture of fear and longing.

Searching Chuck's eyes, her own well up with tears - she was sorry for hanging up on him, overcome with feeling so special, and now she was embarrassed on top of it. They'd had fewer dates than she could count on one hand. Yet those soft brown eyes were eyes that she felt like she'd known all her life. She'd told him he didn't want him anymore, but he'd showed up anyway... to sing to her... to treat her like no one else ever had: like a princess.

His request to tell him to his face that she wanted him to leave hangs in the air and her lower lip quivers. She'd been so determined on the phone. But looking up at him now, it was impossible to repeat what she'd said to him. "I... I can't."

Backing away, she turns around and wipes her eyes with her sleeve. "You're the only man that can make me feel like an idiot and it isn't even your fault." Keeping her back turned, she folds her arms and stares at the wall. She'd told Chuck before that being with him terrified her. But did he really realize how true it was? "I don't.... I don't know how to have a friend like you." Her voice quivers as a new tear rolls down her cheek. "You're all I can think about, but when you ask me out, I want to cower in the corner and say no." She sniffs. "I'm not used to living in a fairytale. I just... I don't know if I can do this. I'll end up ruining the whole thing and I'll just make you unhappy." Not to mention, what if it really didn't work out? What if she started to depend on having him around and then they'd have to part? What then? And yet, would she be having so much trouble now if Darlene hadn't been all up in arms?

Poor Chuck. The last time they'd been out, she'd been convinced she could do this. She'd had a great time and she'd given him the impression that she was willing to give this a try. And now... now she was telling him that she was backing out. What must he think of her? She was probably confusing the tar out of him - she didn't mean to though. It was just all these stupid feelings getting in the way.

Covering her face with her hands, she groans. She didn't deserve to be in a fairytale anyway. She was positively the most absurd woman on the planet. She had no idea what was wrong with her - she never acted like this. Flipping back and forth between saying yes and no and leading Chuck on just to turn him away. "Just shoot me now," she mumbles. "Just shoot me and leave me wallowing in my miserable no-life...life."

Thanks To

Not knowing if Susanne really would come out or not, and not being able to hear anything from her office Chuck just sat. But catching movment finally he can see part of Susanne's face peek around the corner. A smile spreads across his lips at just how adorable he thought she looked. She was so soft, so innocent, and timid. Chuck likes that not because he could use it to his advantage but because she hadn't been runed by the world and he new her intentions were pure.

Taking the cd from the player and putting it in the case Chuck makes his way over to Susanne his eyes sparkling and the grin forming on his lips. Stopping a short ways in front of her Chuck holds the cd out to her.

"I'd called you today because I put together a cd of different older rock music I've song and I thought you might like it. I just wanted to give it to you, and now...if you want me to go away and leave you alone...just tell me to my face, and I wont bother you again."

Chuck's own heart raced as he wondered if she would tell him to go away again. If she did tell him though now that he could look into her eyes he would. But he hoped she would not. He'd really enjoyed there time together, and it was always nice conversations to be held. Chuck hadn't felt this good in a long while, and it was thanks to Susanne.

Poor Susanne

Still working and trying like mad to get it all done and stay focused, the sudden music from the main floor is startling. No one was left out there... just a couple people in their offices down the hall. What on earth... Then Susanne hears a familiar voice.

Looking up from her desk, her eyes go wide as she listens. Already, she could feel her cheeks growing hot and she sits, frozen in place. It was Chuck. Chuck was here. He was singing to her. After she'd just told him off and hung up on him, he'd come.

Logic told her that she should be upset - Chuck should have respected her wishes and known she did not want to see her. He should have backed off with such a blatant brushoff. But while that was logic, it was her heart that told her the exact opposite. He was still trying. Despite all her bungles and rejections, he was still trying. He was here for her. If he was just out for one thing, he would have given up by now. It was her he wanted... her... for who she was. For him to put up with her was enough to make that obvious.

Susanne's pulse speeds up just a little and she slowly rises from her desk. She should tell him to leave. She should just go out there and say she was sorry, but it wasn't going to work.

But as she reaches the door way and peeks out with one eye, something holds her there. There he was. Chuck. Her heart raced just looking at him. And his voice was so soft and pure. It made her melt all over again.

Leaning on the door frame, the only thing visible from the main floor was part of her face as she watched and listened, afraid to come out. She was afraid of what she felt and afraid of what she might say as all her prior plans were flushed down the tubes. All she can do is stand, her feet glued to the floor.

Your Song

Standing stunned at Susanne hands up on him Chuck pulls the phone away from his ear and just looks at his. Susanne's voice had been very monotone almost like she was reading what had been said to him not to mention its just seemed odd. They had, had a great time the last time they were together and Susanne did pretty much know everything about him. He had layed almost everything about his life to her other than his own childhood.

Just sitting there a long moment Chuck still turns to understand and wrap his head around everything. It was such a strange change from the last time he talked to her. Though she had said not to call him anymore she didn't say not to see him, and if she really did want nothing to do with him, than she should say it to his face he had to know for sure she meant it. Not to mention at least his the CD he made for her.

It didn't take long for Chuck to get TJY. He new it was late and most everyone was gone. Susanne and who knows who else would be there but Chuck didn't much care. Heading down the same way he had before. Getting to the main floor where all the cubicles where Chuck stops for a moment getting a glance into Susanne's office where she was working. She did look busy but he had to know, he had to show Susanne, and than see her eyes when she told him to go away.

Spotting a cd player at on of the desks Chuck looks at it for a moment and than back at Susanne for a moment. Going over to it he takes the cd from his pocket and puts it into the playing. Knowing what song he was looking for Chuck skips the first few before letting the next song play. The soft melody comes form the player he turns it up and clears his throat. The words coming from the player were his own as a soft piano played. Knowing Chuck one could tell it was him playing it, and his voice. His own now matching it as he sung loud and clear.

It's a little bit funny this feeling inside
I'm not one of those who can easily hide
I don't have much money but boy if I did
I'd buy a big house where we both could live

If I was a sculptor, but then again, no
Or a man who makes potions in a travelling show
I know it's not much but it's the best I can do
My gift is my song and this one's for you

And you can tell everybody this is your song
It may be quite simple but now that it's done
I hope you don't mind
I hope you don't mind that I put down in words
How wonderful life is while you're in the world

Chuck didn't know if Susanne would come out to see the noise or not, but he hoped she was at least listing to the music. It how she made him feel though and he just couldn't help it.

I sat on the roof and kicked off the moss
Well a few of the verses well they've got me quite cross
But the sun's been quite kind while I wrote this song
It's for people like you that keep it turned on

So excuse me forgetting but these things I do
You see I've forgotten if they're green or they're blue
Anyway the thing is what I really mean
Yours are the sweetest eyes I've ever seen

And you can tell everybody this is your song
It may be quite simple but now that it's done
I hope you don't mind
I hope you don't mind that I put down in words
How wonderful life is while you're in the world