Losing It

Jason looks down into Misty's eyes, a little surprised to hear she hadn't been going to church. It made sense - if he were her, he probably wouldn't have wanted to go either, for several reasons. He felt badly now though, having never even thought to bring up the subject. He should have.

"Well... I know that Carson hasn't been going." He'd heard that from a couple different people. "But regardless, I'd love to go with you." Only now had he even thought about the fact that Katie would be back at their own church on Sunday - and he wasn't quite sure how to handle that one either. Going with Misty would kill more than two birds with one stone.

Squeezing Misty tightly, Jason plants another kiss on top of her head before smiling again. "Have I told you tonight that you look beautiful?"


Though hearing and seeing Victoria approach, Garret doesn't move. One might think he was asleep... or worse. But as she kneels in front of him, his eyes finally lower from the sky, coming to rest on her own gaze. She was worried. Even in the dark he could see it. He couldn't blame her either - not after his outburst earlier today, then his senseless ramblings.

Searching her moonlit face, his focus drifts over her delicate features, memorizing the way she looked right now. Soft. Elegant. Concerned.

Reaching out, he takes her hand, lifting it to his lips to kiss before he responds to her in a quiet voice. "I'm here in body, but my mind wants to remain in a faraway place where there are no walls... no violence... no dictators. A place where you and I are free to live and love the way we want, without hiding in the shadows. That's where my mind is. Can you blame it for being so far away?"

Keeping her hand in his, he leans back against the tree and closes his eyes, sighing deeply. "Do you remember Cory Ryerson?" He knew she would. He'd been a hired thug who liked to come here whenever he could and play bigshot. Always a pain, but, unfortunately, good at his job, which was why Medridge had kept him around. "I killed him this morning. Medridge thinks it was the other side that did it. I just... snapped."

His eyes open once more, looking back up at the moon. "I think I'm losing it, Victoria."

Back to me

To: Hunter
From: Katie

I might not be there but you can still lean on me.
I'm supporting your 100% and will keep cheering
you on. Keep up the good work I want to see you 
again soon.

Smiling back up at Jason Misty was happy that at least something good had come from both there situations. She wasn't sure if this was how it was meant to be or not but at the moment it was what they both needed and it was perfect. Being able to just love each other like they had always wanted to instead of letting it stay tucked away in silence was nice.

   "I have to admit I am kind of happy too. Everything happens for a reason right? I guess we found ours."

Leaning up a little Misty leans into Jason and press her lips to his. At least the both could find a little bit of comfort in there bad situations. They had each other to lean on and to love, and grow with. It was just a nice feeling.

   "Would you like to go to church with me Sunday? I haven't gone since Carson left and I kind of miss it. I just...dont want to be alone if he's there too and I'd love for you to come with me."

Leaving her grandfather's office Victoria new even less now than when she'd gone in. He was still pretty heated and her intention and excuse was to comfort him by trying to set up another ball, or a dinner having all his business associates gather. Really though she was trying to peace together what had happened today and had failed. Maybe she'd never know what happened but as long as Garret would be ok thats what mattered to her.

Quielty slipping out into the night it was easy to get by anyone. She'd changed before dinner into one of her darker dress. Slipping past the camers, and past the guards Victoria finally makes it to her safe haven. It wasn't that anyone would think it was odd she was there but if Garret had shown up before her than they would have found it strange.

The moon lite up the area enough so Victoria could see though her eyes sight at night had become better over the years so she didn't need much. Seeing Garret sitting by the tree she slowly walks over before kneeling on the ground in front of him.

   "You're here tonight but you seem so many miles away. Will you come back to me?"

Lost

Although the rose garden was not private, Garret wasn't too surprised when Victoria shows up. He knew half the property had probably heard the fight. Sitting up straight, his eyes remain downcast, focusing on the stones that made up the path through the garden. Feeling Victoria's hand in his, he curls his fingers around hers as a silent gesture of affection.

"My shoulder will be okay," he responds softly, his voice strained with mixed emotions. "It's not too bad. I'll go get it taken care of, soon as I cool down."

Letting his jaw muscles work out some of his tension, he's quiet again for several moments. "Yeah... heated is a good word. He won't execute me yet though - at least I don't think so. If he does, he'll at least be rid of one more thorn in his side." He shakes his head. "Five men dead - two were ours. Three men wounded, including me. And for what? A little more money? A little more power?" Its takes restraint to keep his tone quiet so as not to alert anyone to their presence here. What he'd just said wasn't the half of it though. There was more. A lot more.

"I blamed Medridge's plan... but it wasn't him. It was me. I told him there was a flaw - that things went wrong. But it was me that was the flaw." But it hadn't just been an innocent mistake. It hadn't been a misinterpretation of plans. That's what Medridge and the others would be told, and what they would believe. But Garret knew the truth. And it was too dangerous to even tell Victoria.

Finally turning his head to look at her, his eyes catch hers, falling into her gaze and wishing beyond hope that one day they'd awake from this terrible nightmare to find a life of peace and freedom. "If you ever get word that I'm a traitor, you deny ever having known me more than an acquaintance. I'll not have you hang with me." Though he whispered, his tone indicated how serious he was. But why he might be accused of such a thing, he would not say.

Without warning, his hand moves behind Victoria's head, pulling her closer to him while he also leans in to close the gap. His kiss was quick, but it was deep... passionate... rough. It wasn't the same gentle affection he usually showed.

Letting her go abruptly, he stands up and heads down the path to exit the garden...

...It would be many hours later, after the moon had risen, that Garret would be seen again. Tucked away in the safety of their hiding place, he waits, not knowing if Victoria would come or not. He didn't sit on the swing tonight though... seated on the ground beneath the tree, fallen leaves and pine needles created a soft bed. Leaned back against the rough bark, his eyes were lifted to the sky, searching the moon for anything that was beyond these walls. Though now cleaned up and having gained an hour or two of sleep, there was a new weariness about him. A new kind of despair. He had tempted fate today and had lost.


To: Katie
From: Hunter
Feeling pretty good. Ive been putting a
little weight on my leg and it hurts but
not quite as bad as I expected. Only
prob is I dont have u to lean on! Idk
yet when Ill actually be able to get on
my bike but hoping soon.


Looking to the side at Misty, Jason purses his lips in thought. "Yeah... maybe. I just don't even know what to say to her. I mean, who's to say anything has changed? Last I knew, she thought I was a liar and not worth sticking around for. If that's still the case, I'm not so sure I really can work with her. If she doesn't trust me, we'd make a poor team anyway."

Sighing deeply, Jason wished he could figure out what he was feeling. It had been so much easier lately to tell what his emotions were, that he'd been feeling as normal as he had in a very long time. But right now, what he was feeling was too mixed up to try and decipher. Then again... no matter how normal he was, if his emotions were this messed up, maybe anybody would have a hard time figuring it out.

Leaning down and cocking his head, Jason gives Misty's lips a long tender kiss before pulling back again. "Whether it's been a rocky road or not though, at least one good thing has come out of all this." He gives her a smile. Finally being able to allow their natural fondness grow was what was keeping him sane.

Try Talking?

Leaning into Jason Misty wasn't paying much attachen to the movie. Listening to Jason talk about his day and how strange it was, was far more important to her at the moment. She new he'd had a rough day with Katie being back and it made him feel odd she wondered though if deep down it was because he still had feelings for her. If he did Misty wouldn't blame him.

   "Sorry the day was so rough on you. I saw her a little bit this morning and she'd said hi and congrats but that was really it. Even that was a bit strange."

Shifting a little bit Misty repositions herself so she could look up at Jason and see his face better. She love to snuggle with him the only bad thing she couldn't look at him and he was way to handsome to not do that once in a while.

   "Maybe if it gets two awkward you can try sitting down and talking to Katie? It might take some of the tension away?"

Laying in her room and just looking out the window and at the sky Katie lets out a small sigh. The day had been long and strange but she had survived. What she'd really like to do it watch a movie or something with Hunter to calm down, but she guess that would have to wait.

To: Hunter
From Katie:

I did make it through the day. I think I got caught
up on all the paper work too. Sapphire did a 
good job while I was gone. Maybe tomorrow I can
do something a little more exciting.

To: Hunter
From: Katie

Yeah Mick is pretty great. He's been though lots
and I think its really helped him before a little more
softer.

To: Hunter
From: Katie

I miss him too. On your way back pack him in your
bag ok? Ohhh your knee is healing...very nice. That
means you can come home soon! How are you
feeling about it?

Hearing the shouting, the argument, tempers flaring Victoria cringed at every noise, and shout she heard. It was not normal for something like this to happen, for there to be a shouting match in this house. It broke many rules, and for most it would mean the end of everything. There employment, this fantasy, of life. Hearing the bang of the door she hurrys to her window and watches as Garret makes his way to the garden. It wasn't there normal place to meet, and it would be slightly dangerous but she had to see what was going on. She'd just have to use a little craft.

Gathering a vase, and a part of flower snipers Victoria head's out to the garden letting one of the guards know she was going to be cutting some flowers if anyone was looking for her. It was something simple but it would do the trick, and believable.

Wandering around the flowers and picking some here and some there placing them in the vase Victoria finally comes to where Garret is sitting and picks a few roses before sitting down next to him and arranging them in the vase just not able to get them right.

   "Sounds like things got a little heated in there. Something must have really gone wrong to have you headed enough to lose your head and yell at my grandfather like that."

Softening a little Victoria's hand slips over to Garret's as she holds it for a moment giving it a tiny squeeze. As the days when by it seemed to get harder and harder to keep her feelings locked away, to not want to run to him no matter the time, and to tell him how she felt with anyone around. It just didn't seem fare and she wondered would it even be different?

   "Is your shoulder ok? You should probley get it looked at just to make sure no infection starts....I'm happy your back too...I missed you more this time than the last."
  

Darkness of Insanity

Jason sighs and leans back a little more in the couch, keeping his arm tucked around Misty. He'd suggested his place tonight - mainly because he wanted her all to himself for a while. The day had been insane, and they hadn't even been able to grab lunch together. Finally alone at his place, his body was exhausted while his mind was still racing. 

They'd picked a movie they'd both seen, so talking during it didn't bother either one of them. A big bowl of popcorn sat almost empty on the coffee table, Trooper keeping his eye on hit, but resisting the urge to beg. 

"It was really weird seeing Katie today," he admits quietly. "I know I shouldn't be upset anymore, but all of a sudden it was like I was getting the knife in my heart again and it just made me mad. I know Reese is gonna end up putting us together on cases again though and I'm just not sure how to handle it." 

Hunter lies on his back in bed, holding up his phone to type a text. It was late - later than planned, getting to bed. But he'd thoroughly enjoyed his evening. Hanging out with Mick and Rosetta and BJ had been so much fun and so relaxing. Then later it had ended up just being him and Mick sitting and talking for a very long time at the kitchen table. They had discussed everything from the ranch's history, the Henson-Pent clan, to Hunter's own past, to racing, to God. It had felt... good... to talk to someone like Mick about some of those things. Some of those tough subjects. He was easy to talk to and never seemed to hold any judgment against Hunter either. Even when Hunter had admitted being fearful that he'd become dependent on alcohol, Mick had been encouraging, not judgmental.

To: Katie

From: Hunter

Hey Babe. Did u survive the day? I had

a good evening tonight. One of the best.

The only thing missing here is u. 

Otherwise, it would be perfect. 

To: Katie

From: Hunter

Micks the greatest - just sayin. 

To: Katie

From: Hunter

Ur dad misses u but seems to be doing 

well. I saw him riding today. Oh & 

Angel says my knee is healing well. Get 

to start weaning off crutches. Go me.

Not all words could be clearly understood as they came from behind the closed door, but anyone on the first three floors of the house could hear the heated argument as the two men's voices were raised an anger. 

"If you ever... I will... and you... ever again!"

"...stupid! ...endangered... I will not..."

"...my authority! ....dare you... service... don't care if... will be enforced!"

"I don't care! ...you ...deceit... it'll all go down... blame me..."

It was such a rare occurrence to hear such an argument, that some of the servants had paused their work to glance at each other with concern. That such a high ranking agent would dare engage in such a confrontation was appalling. No one ever dared such a tactic - it would be his life, for sure. No one got away with questioning the commander, let alone entering into an argument. 

As the office opens, those nearby quickly resumed their tasks as to not be caught trying to listen. The slamming of the door echoes through the halls like a cannon shot, followed by Garret's deliberate footsteps. Dressed in his full black combat gear, he had not yet changed since returning from his latest assignment, and the display of more than one sidearm and other weapons was enough to make anyone steer clear of his path, if his glare alone didn't do it. One might feel his eyes could pierce through steel. 

Quickly stalking through the house and outdoors, Garret aims for the gardens as his blood boils. He was tired, hungry and in dire need of a shower. Three days and nights without sleep, food or soap and water had seen to that. And one botched mission had brought him to this point now. Or was it really the fact of a botched mission that had led up to his temper exploding? Blaming Medridge was gutsy. Yelling accusations at him was more than gutsy - it was stupid. But Garret felt as though he'd reached his limit. It had been more than a botched mission out there. It had been a failed attempt that he could speak of to no one. And making a scene about what had gone wrong was the only way to cover up the truth.

Finding a cement bench, secluded in amongst the rose bushes, he sits down, resting his elbows on his knees to put his face in his hands. He was lucky and he knew it. Anyone else would have received a death sentence for the stunt he'd just pulled. And he still might. But he doubted it. He was too important to Medridge at this point. Too valuable. Like a prized possession. 

Feeling the sting return to his shoulder, Garret lifts his face to glance at his arm where the bullet wound had started to bleed again, despite the bandanna tied around it. It was just a scratch - he'd only been grazed. But he knew he needed to go have the medic clean it out and put a proper bandage on it anyway.

Returning his face to his hands, he fights his churning emotions. Was he going mad? Was he going to be pushed until he simply lost his mind? It felt as though if he simply let go, he'd fall into the darkness of insanity. And for what? What was the point? Where was the reason in all of this?

Horizon

Giving a laugh Grace was happy to see Jared decided to take his shoes and socks off and at least try to put his feet in the sand. As she gets the little shove to the shoulder she makes it a little more dramatic than it really was going one way and than coming back the other way to bump back into Jared. 

   "I'm going to hold you to that you know."

Grace gives him a smile before looking back out at the water. It was just clear enough that on the horizon you could make out little buildings. They were small dots but you could still see them more than normal and it was strange to think there was this vast space and yet you could make them out but try to get there alone and you'd probley never make it.

   "It's the little things sometimes we take for granted like feeling the sand between our toes. Sometimes we just have to slow down and try things we have before again and this time really try to enjoy it. It's funny how the little things can bring the most joy."

To: Hunter
From: Katie

Ok...lol. I should get back to work too.
I'll talk to ya again soon.

 ....Several days later Chad was back in Nevada and seeing Rosalyn's letter made him smile a little more each time. He was happy they were not writing back and forth and reading he could hear her voice in his head. Hey voice was way to pretty to forget.

Rosalyn,

  Oh the agony of not being able to sew the buttons back on my shirt. Maybe I should just send you a box with a bunch of them in it to give you something to do? Ok ok I wouldn't do that to you really. I'd just make sure to wair those shirts if I came to see you again.

   So I have some down time now that I am back in Nevada.  No work again right away and while I love my job its nice to just sit at home without anyone around have have some peace. One thing I though of though was I hadn't answered your question about how I get my mail. Sorry about that. Before we leave for our next destination we get emails about where we will be staying and how long. So that gives us time to go to the post office and set up a forwarding address. That way we all can make sure we take care of what we need to while away. You know that whole being responsible thing.

   It does feel in a way like we have known each other for a long time. I just feel so comfortable talking to you, and I feel like I can be so open, really it is nice. It's also nice to know you don't mind about my past. It's a black mark and alone with my tattoos most people like to judge me by it before even knowing me. So it makes me feel really good that to you its not even there.

   What do our letters mean, what do our kiss mean, I'm not sure myself. I'd like to say I want to court you, get to know you even more, and form a relationship but with how my work goes I wouldn't be around much and thats a big restriction to put on a new relationship, and I'd never ask you to wait around for me like that. So for now if you'd like we can continue how we are and see how it goes. All I know is I like you a lot Rosalyn as strange as it sounds I really do. In such a short time, you've become very special to me.

   I really feel like I could keep this letting going, finding new things to write about, to tell you about. About new things I'd like to show you one day, and promises of taking you places with me. But I guess I should end this letter so you can stop reading and continue one with your day.

   I'm looking at the moon right now, and I think I saw your reflection in it. Think I'll sit on the porch a while and just enjoy the warm breeze and continue to think about you.

     Forever and Always,
         Chad

I gaze up at the sky each night
and find the brightest star.
It's always waiting there for me
so close, but yet so far.
The star winks in the evening sky
and reaches out to me.
It magically appears each night
for all the world to see.
I've wished upon this special star
my whole life through, it seems.
I've closed my eyes and made my wish
of hopes, and plans, and dreams.
And then, one day I got my wish
for I finally met you.
You are that someone special
who's made all my dreams come true.
So now whenever we're apart
I find that same bright star.
It makes me feel so close to you
no matter where you are.