Afraid

Everything Victoria said - all of her questions - it was so familiar. It was all the same things that had gone through his own mind a thousand times before he'd made his decision. And to some extent, there were not answers for everything. As Victoria mentioned Aaron, Garret's eyes flashed with concern. Aaron was a good agent, but he could also be a loose cannon, which could really mess this thing up. He'd have to handle that...somehow.

"Yes...yes, I'm crazy." Garret paced a small circle, his mind reeling. "But we're here, don't you see? We're already out. I know it won't be easy, but I would rather spend my life with you and have to look over my shoulder, or even die, than to live with you in sight but out of reach forever." He shook his head. "I don't care what the Agency thinks or what your grandfather might do. Nothing can be more painful than living at the estate day after day after day as a robot forbidden to be near you."

His eyes found hers again, begging her to understand. To see through his eyes. To feel through his heart. To accept this offer now. "I haven't been brainwashed. I've been thinking about this for a long time and just waiting for an opening. All those botched missions?" His shoulders sank slightly. "Those were my first attempts to get out, and I just covered them up so no one would know. I can't take it anymore. The orders. The senseless killing of innocents. The obsession of Medridge to do nothing but torture. I have lived with it for far too long and..." His words caught in his throat as a childhood memory flashed through his mind. Victoria didn't even know of his true past - few did. And it was something he did not like to revisit. He quickly recovered and shook his head again. "...I just want to be free. With you."

Stepping towards her again, he took her hands in his. "It will take time to gain the Elite's trust, but I believe it's possible. Eventually, the handcuffs will come off. Nate...the agent who was shot, he's...he's different. This place is different. I can't explain it - I don't know what it is. But if we commit to helping them, they won't send us to prison, and at least we'll have someone to watch our backs if your grandfather sends men after us."

He paused, knowing full well that he was giving her a huge load of information all at once - and also turning her world upside down. Not to mention, he knew his behavior was not at all what she was used to. But he didn't see any other way. "I know this is a lot to take in, and I am so sorry it had to be this way. But in just a few minutes, that door is going to open again, and I'm going to have to start giving them answers. I've got to know... will you stay with me? Will you see this through and change your allegiance so we can be together?" Oh how he wanted her to say yes. To join him in this quest for freedom. To stay with him. His eyes searched hers for answers, but all he could see was her confusion, and he was afraid. Afraid she might say no. 


Standing outside the hospital room, Tal held two coffees. He'd gotten back several minutes ago, but had respected the private conversation going on between Eli and Ryan. It was hard not to hear what was being said though, and now Tal wasn't sure if he wished he hadn't overheard or not. His insides felt like they were tying themselves in knots, and he sank down in a chair instead of going into the room.

He'd known Ryan had had a hard time letting go of Alec in the first place. He'd known it would take a while for her to get over her feelings. He'd known she had taken Alec's death hard. And maybe way down deep in his heart, Tal had always sensed there was more. But to hear her say it out loud...to fully admit to Eli that yes, she'd still been in love with Alec...it made Tal's heart hurt in a whole new way.

Maybe it was just because she was emotionally strained. Or maybe it was just the meds talking. Maybe...maybe... But Tal knew that whether or not those factors came into play, Ryan had just spoken the truth. Whether he liked it or not, his gut told him that no matter Ryan's current mental state, she had just been honest with her brother.

Tal leaned his head back against the wall as his mind tried to work through this. What she'd just said...it meant that all along...all this time...while Tal had thought he had her heart, in truth, it had been with another man. Not only that, but another man who had even had him beaten within an inch of his life. Yet Ryan's heart had remained with him. Now that Alec was gone, Ryan couldn't ever return to him...but that didn't seem to matter anymore. Tal was just second pick. That was all. No matter how hard he tried to win over Ryan's heart, he'd always know that she'd never really wanted to be with him. And he couldn't simply go on and justify his efforts with the fact that Alec was now dead. Tal's heart had been betrayed, and his love crushed.

His eyes glanced to the open door. Now what? Ryan was in bad shape. How could he just walk in there, tell her he overheard, and call things off? Yet how could he pretend he hadn't heard the truth? It was all one big mess in his mind, and he had no idea how to handle this. What he did know though, was that his relationship with Ryan...it had just been severed. He couldn't keep trying anymore. He was done. 

Eli smiled and nodded at his sister. "As soon as they say it's okay, I'll take you home. They just want to make sure you're going to be okay. Then we'll work on everything else, alright?" He didn't care what it took. He didn't care if he had to quit work to be at home with her and watch her twenty-four/seven. She was his baby sister, and he would not fail his father. Already his mind was racing with options and ideas on what to do. Who to call. Ryan did need help, and he knew it would have to come from someone who knew what they were doing. His little talks with her wouldn't be enough for this one. But at least she was willing, and that was the first and most important step. 

Seeing a shadow on the floor, he glanced up to see Tal with the coffee, and nodded. "Thanks."

"Sure." Tal handed him his cup, and forced a small smile. "Everything okay?"

Eli nodded. "It will be." He truly believed his sister could pull through this. It wouldn't be easy, but he believed. "I'm gonna see how long it will take to get her out of here and take her home."

"Good idea." Tal wandered to the other side of the bed and looked down at Ryan. He wanted to badly to take care of her. Hold her. Comfort her. He wanted to be the one to see her through this. But he knew now that it was not his place. It never had been. He'd just believed a fairytale that was now ending. But seeing her like this - he couldn't confront her now. But he couldn't stay either. Instead, he leaned down to give her a soft kiss on the forehead. "I need to go and at least get a partial day in at work."

Eli quirked an eyebrow. Something felt strange. "I'm sure the boss would let you-"

"It's okay," Tal cut him off. "If you need help with anything though, let me know." He walked slowly to the door and paused once to just glance over his shoulder. "Don't give the doctors too much trouble." It was a lame attempt to tease, but it was all he had.