Don't worry

Eric sighs, trying not to get upset. He didn't like being pushed. The rule around here was to get back in the saddle, and he didn't like breaking that rule whether his leg felt like it was on fire or not. It was a bad example to younger riders, and it would make it harder to control Static next time too. 

On the other hand, Stacy was his weakness. And seeing the worry on her face, well... it didn't make him feel very good. He didn't want her getting all worked up about anything. 

He finally relents. "Alright, okay... Chad, take me to Angel's." His eyes swing back to Stacy. "But then you go to the barn and make sure one of the guys gets a hold on Static and puts him in his stall without unsaddling him." 

Aiming towards Angel's office, he hobbles alongside Chad. Why did his leg hurt this bad? It really didn't make sense to him. He hadn't fallen that hard. What he didn't realize was after he'd landed and Static took off, one of Static's hooves had caught his leg as he'd bolted. As a result, his thigh had taken the impact of the fall, then received an extra hard slam after that. A weak spot anyway, it had instantly become another deep tissue bruise that, unbeknown to him, was already turning black and blue. And he was once again a prime target for infection.

Getting to Angel's office, Eric had loosened up enough that climbing the couple steps wasn't too bad. Seeing her at her desk when they enter, he gives her a wry grin. "Mornin." Letting go of Chad, he gives the man a thankful nod. "I'm alright now. You should probably go find that little lady before she thinks we all hate her." 

Another smirk is given to Angel. "Long story. I just took a little tumble off Static and Stacy insisted I come see you about my leg. I'm sure it's nothing, but I figured I'd make her happy."

Justin felt badly for Hope. He knew she only wanted what was best for Scott, and it was a shame she'd been trying to hide her love. The thing was, it just couldn't be hidden. It wasn't her fault though. She couldn't help it, and there was nothing wrong about her love. It was Scott who had the issues, making this into a sad situation. Justin knew what it felt like to not want to acknowledge feelings for someone else. But he couldn't imagine feeling such deep love and trying to hide it so the other person would still be a friend. 

Standing up he offers Hope an encouraging smile. "Don't worry. We'll get this figured out. Scott doesn't have a chance against the two of us." He tosses her a wink. "I'll talk to you again soon."

Leaving TJY, the wheels in his mind were already turning...

Hearing a knock at the door, Scott pauses his work of taping up photographs on the wall. He hadn't expected anybody to stop by, but he wasn't totally surprised either since he'd left his phone off the hook all day and had turned off his cell phone.

Domino races to the door and starts barking up a storm, boldly protecting the house.

"Scott?" Justin calls. "You home?"

Realizing who it was, Scott turns from his desk, leaving shut the drawer that held his handgun, and telling Domino she could calm down. Shuffling to the door in his baggy jeans, he unlocks it and opens it slowly, squinting in the sunlight. "Justin? Did I forget you were coming today?"

Justin grins and shakes his head. "Naw. But I happened to be in town. Stopped by TJY and since you weren't there, I just thought I might touch base and make sure everything was okay."

For a few moments, Scott debates on whether or not to open the door wider, but he finally does. "Yeah, things are fine." Turning, he leaves Justin to follow if he wants as he heads back to the living room.

Entering after him, Justin stops in the living room doorway and stares at the walls that were covered in photographs. "Whoa. These all yours?"

"Yeah." Scott looks at a few more that were scattered on his coffee table. "Only way to really choose the ones I like. Hang 'em up and compare."

"I see." Looking more closely, Justin studies the photographs, some that were freshly made. Most were black and white. And most were simply of objects or nature with unique angles, but with seemingly perfect lighting and focus. They were truly works of art. But one thing about them bothered Justin. "These all recent?"

"Huh? Yeah, I think so." Scott stands back and surveys a couple more pictures. By now he'd run out of empty spaces.

Justin wanders to the coffee table and picks up one of the photographs to look at it more closely. It was of an alleyway somewhere in town. "None of these seem too... happy."

Scott just shrugs.

Pursing his lips, Justin replaces the picture and turns his attention to Scott instead. "These are fantastic, but they all seem a bit dark, don't you think?"

Scott shrugs again. "I dunno. Just 'cause they don't have any smiling babies doesn't mean they're dark."

"No, but I don't see any of Domino... or Hope."

Scott's gaze drifts over to Justin. "You talked to her today, didn't you?"

"I did." There was no point in denying it.

"And I suppose she's worried about me."

"Does she have reason to be?"

Another shrug is Scott's answer. "I'm fine. I just think it's time she should move on."

"Why's that?"

"'Cause it's stupid to wait on somebody like me."

"So you think she's waiting?"

Scott throws Justin an irritated look. "I don't think. I know."

Justin sighs and takes a couple steps closer to him while he mulls it all over. "And...whose choice is that?"

"Apparently hers, but I don't have to go along with it."

"Think pushing her away will get her to stop waiting?"

"Worth a try, isn't it?"

"Then you don't love her like she loves you?"

"I didn't say that."

"So tell me again why you don't want her waiting."

"I never told you in the first place."

"Then how about you do?"

Scott frowns at Justin's persistence, and sinks down into his couch, joined by Domino, who curls up in his lap. "Is this why you came? On Hope's behalf, or what?"

"No, I came on your behalf." Justin half-sits on the armrest at he other end of the couch. "So tell me why Hope shouldn't wait for you, especially if you love her, too."

"Because I'll never be ready!" Scott raises his voice. "And it beats me why she refuses to see that."

"Why won't you ever be ready?"

"Look at me!" Scott throws up his hands. "I may not be in a mental hospital anymore and I may be back to work and living alone again, but seriously? I still jump at my own shadow. I get nightmares so bad that I wake myself up screaming, then go puke my guts out the rest of the night. Half the time I can't decide if I even want to roll out of bed in the morning or just stay there. And sometimes I wish I'd never wake up again at all."

Justin's body language doesn't change, even though on the inside he was picking up on all sorts of red flags. He was glad Hope had alerted him to Scott's behavior. Last week's visit had not been like this at all. "So you made it this far and you just decided it's not worth it anymore, huh?"

"I don't know."

Justin's brow furrows. "Well you better figure it out before somebody calls Brookshire."

Scott's head snaps up as he stares at Justin. "Never again."

"When was the last time you ate?"

"Yesterday."

"When?"

"How should I know? Noon? It was lunch, alright?"

"Why didn't you want to go to work today?"

"I just didn't feel like it!"

Justin holds his eyes on Scott, letting silence speak for itself.

Scott looks down at Domino and swallows hard. His tone quiets as the realization hits him. "It's starting all over again, isn't it?"

"It does seem to be. But it doesn't have to turn out the same way. You have control over this thing. It does not control you."

"Sure doesn't feel like it sometimes."

"Sometimes it won't. You're going to have these rough spots, Scott. No one can survive what you did and come away without scars. It's like a broken bone. It can heal, but after that, it might ache every time the weather changes. You just have to realize when the pain is happening so you can take care of it and not allow it to control you. And right now, you're giving in to it. This is the first of many rough spots to come - but you have the power to overcome them. And if you do, it'll get just a little easier each time."

Scott leans his head back into the couch cushion and sighs.

After a few moments, Justin resumes talking. "What you do with Hope is your business. But I think you'd agree that pushing her away is just another sign that this thing has a hold on you. You're letting it drag you down, when you're so much stronger than that. It's the strength Hope sees in you, not the weakness. That's why she's willing to wait. But if you really stop and think about it, I know you'll see that there's a bigger picture here."

"I was doing so well," Scott whispers. "I was the last time too. Then it all fell apart."

"Why do you think it fell apart?"

"I don't know."

"Did you ask anybody for help?"

Scott shakes his head. No, he'd pushed everyone away... just like he was starting to do now, all over again. "No... that's why they forced me to go to Brookshire."

"So how can we make this time different?"

"I don't know."

Allowing another pause, Justin finally stands up. "Come on. Get your shoes on and grab Domino's leash."

"Where are we going?"

"For me to know. Come on. Let's go." In truth, Justin was still trying to decide on a location. He hadn't planned on being in town this long today at all, but Scott was worth it... 

"Drink."

Too tired to argue, Scott accepts the concoction that Justin hands him. Sitting at his kitchen table, his clothes were still damp from sweat and every muscle in his body ached. Giving the green, thick liquid just a quick glance, he raises the glass and swallows it down. 

Justin makes sure he's drinking the mix of fruit and vegetable juices before going to the sink and giving Domino some water. The little dog looked utterly exhausted, but accepted the drink with enthusiasm, giving Justin's hand a thankful lick. After giving her a few loving scratches behind her ears, Justin joins Scott at the table. "How ya feel?"

Scott shakes his head, struggling to finish his drink. "Like I'm gonna fall asleep right here if I don't puke first." 

"Good." Justin gives his shoulder a hearty pat. He'd taken Scott a few miles out of town for a hike, and had wound up taking a path several miles one way, complete with rough terrain for a hearty walk. For Justin, it had been a rather nice jaunt. For Scott, it had been a more vigorous workout than he'd had in a long time.

"I'll be back in a couple days," Justin figures. "In the meantime, I want you to go to work tomorrow. Even if you sleep late, I still want you to go, alright?"

Scott nods numbly. At the moment, all he wanted to do was crawl in bed, but he had just enough willpower left to agree to going to work. He wasn't sure his mood was any better than it had been earlier, but his body certainly was exhausted. Well...maybe his mind felt a little better. "Yeah, okay." 

"Alright." Standing again, Justin glances at his watch. He'd have to hustle if he was going to make it home in time to clean up before hitting the road again and going to Beth's. It sure was an awful lot of driving between North Springs and Briarville but at this point, he figured it was worth it. He wouldn't want to lose Beth, and he didn't want to spend less time with his mother or his clients here either. 

Scott gives him a brief wave. "See ya."

"You certainly will." Seeing Scott had finished over half his drink, Justin was satisfied and aims for the door.

Jared lies in bed, propped up with a couple pillows, bored to death of the shows on television. Every day, things got just a little more boring, just adding to his frustrations. To make things worse, two days ago, he'd fallen and hurt his right shoulder. A doctor's visit revealed he had a bad enough tear that surgery was already scheduled. It wasn't that the fall itself had been that bad, but after he'd hurt that shoulder in the accident to begin with, something seemingly simple turned out much worse. It made Jared wonder how weak the rest of his body really was, and if he'd be prone to injuries from here on out. 

For now though, his shoulder hurt more than the pain killers could handle, so once again, he was stuck in bed, inside, doing nothing. He'd tried not to let it get him down, but being down already to begin with didn't help matters. At least today Grace was coming.

At this point, that was the only thing that shone light into Jared's word. He'd thought back several times to their kiss, and hoped that after these few days had passed, that she wouldn't feel too differently... he really didn't want things to become awkward between them. He'd enjoyed the moment of affection and he had no idea where it was going, if anywhere, but he did feel a tinge of excitement, knowing she was coming back today. 

You better

Continuing to let Eric lean on him Chad didn't mind. This was partly his fault and he did feel bad that someone got physically hurt. As Stacy comes over Chad is just quiet letting her and Eric talk. She didn't want to get into the middle of it but he didn't want to just leave Eric there by himself either.

   "It's not a problem Eric. I do think seeing Angel is a good idea though."

Just watching Chad and Eric for a moment Stacy could tell that Eric wasn't ok. Maybe he didn't have any broken bones and was not bleeding to death but she could tell by his limp and the way he was keeping his weight off his leg he did end up hurting it again.

   "Oh Eric...I think Chad's right. At least go see Angel please? I know you might think you ok, but you should take it easy so it doesn't get bad again. If she says its ok than you can ride again please?"

Stacy's eyes begged Eric to at least see Angel and make sure worse was going on with him. She cared and new he would be leaving soon to start driving again so she just wanted to make sure he was ok before he went. She cared about him enough to be worried, and Stacy hated to seeing him hurt more than anything in the world.

   "It would be better for your leg to heal quicker with Angel's help than to be down and out again for a long time right?"

Hope lets out a long sigh. Justin was a good councler and she could see why. He could see things differently than she could not that, that was bad but they both had there own ways and it made them see, think and react differently. In a way it was good for Scott to have both sides.

As Justin pinpoints how much Hope still loved Scott she looks down for a second. She didn't think he was dumb and not realize it but she thought she was doing a good job of hiding it. Maybe really she wasn't doing as well as she thought. She'd never push Scott though and just wished he'd understand that.

   "I guess I should of known better than to try and hide that I still loved him from Scott. I just, cared so much that I wanted to over look that love and at least have a friendship. In a way I guess I can't balm him for pushing me away I just wish he wouldn't"

Thinking for a second again and looking down at her hands Hope was happy Justin said he would check on Scott. She new if something was going on with him too he would be sure to take care of it and Hope was happy for that. The last thing she wanted was for Scott to relaps.

   "Thanks for getting back to me Justin. If you need anything from me, just let me know."