10/22/12

Spare me...

The restaurant had been closed for a couple days, but Carson had come by to check on things anyway, knowing that he would need to open up again - and soon - if he was going to keep it afloat. He'd fiddled in the kitchen a while, checked supplies and decided to lock up again before heading to the apartment. Apparently Jaz was still staying with Con and Jamie tonight - which was just fine with Carson. He'd rather not have to worry about her too right now, with everything else going on. 

Hearing the bell on the front door ring, his senses are alerted. Nobody should be here. It was almost midnight. Cautiously looking out from the kitchen, he sees nothing. No one. Strange. Too strange. Now completely on guard, he makes his way slowly out into the dining area, still seeing no one. When he reaches the door though, he suddenly spies a note taped to the glass. Frowning, he takes it off and brings it to where there was more light. It was just a scrap of paper with a quickly-written note:

Game over. You win. 

Carson's eyes roam the interior of the restaurant again. This didn't make any sense. The Agency had won, not him. They had succeeded in tearing his and Misty's lives apart. Why... would this be from them? Yet there was no other explanation. Who else would leave such a note? And things had been quiet the last few days. Since everything had blown up, no one from the Agency had contacted him or Jaz at all. Would they... really let them go now? Of course... the damage had been done. They probably knew that Misty wasn't taking him back - a bonus to Medridge for sure. And now they'd just... drop the whole thing? Let them go? 

Carson crumples the note in his hand. Yes... yes, the Agency would do that. Because without an end, he would constantly be looking over his shoulder, wondering when they would be back. 



Getting home, Tal found himself sitting for a long time in the living room, kept company by Holly and Tasha. No lights... no television... just him and his thoughts. And though pondering for a long while the things Ryan had said, and his relationship with her, when he finally went to bed, he had come to very few conclusions... other than he was still didn't understand how he'd gotten to this point or why. It didn't feel fair and it didn't make sense...

It was rare that Tal was late getting anywhere, but the next morning, he clocked in at work a half an hour later than when he was supposed to. It was a very quiet morning, with several guys not coming in until the afternoon. Normally, Tal would like it  just being him and Eli, but today he was just a little reluctant. Silently going to help Eli prep a car, he sets to work.

Looking over at his friend, Eli immediately picks up on his friend's mood and decides not to tease him about being late. "Mornin!"

"Mmhmm." Tal sticks to his end of the car, not feeling like much small talk.

Eli quirks an eyebrow but doesn't pursue conversation. On a normal day, the garage would be filled with their banter as they worked. Today, it was silent, and it created an odd atmosphere.

Twenty minutes later though, Tal couldn't stand it any longer. "Did you know?"

Eli looks to him quickly, surprised at the abrupt entry to conversation. But he knew exactly what Tal was talking about. He'd wondered how last night had gone with Ryan - she'd been awfully quiet when getting home - and he was already guessing it hadn't been the best of dates. Now he wasn't sure just how to respond, but the truth was a good place to start. "Yes..." He continues working, as does Tal.

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"Figured that was Ryan's job."

"So... you don't really care either? That the guy who wanted me dead was hanging around?"

Eli pauses at the car and turns to look at Tal. "You know that's not true."

"Well it sure feels like it." Tal's tone was angry...hurt. "I almost die... you both seem upset about it... then my attacker shows up and neither of you even thought to mention it?"

Eli could feel himself starting to tense, but he still didn't know the best approach to this whole thing.

Tal took advantage of the pause to keep talking. "I mean... Ryan says she loves me... yet she's fighting feelings for a man who put me in the hospital? I understand she was in love with Alec and I get that he had her heart before me. But now? To not only let him close but let him kiss her? Allow him that close? While I'm in the background, the clueless fool, thinking I did something wrong?"

Eli steps back from the car and folds his arms, sighing. Tal had a point, and he didn't know what to say. "A woman's heart is-"

"Spare me the talk about hearts!" Tal raises his voice, throwing his rag to the side. "It's about honesty... loyalty... integrity. If I meant anything to Ryan, she woulda either told Alec to get lost or at the very least, given me a heads up so I could be watching my back."

Eli had sense enough to know that Tal was more upset with the situation than at Eli himself - it wasn't like Tal to yell, and maybe the best thing right now was to just let him vent. "I'm sorry this whole thing has upset you."

"Upset? I'm disappointed. Hurt." And it showed in Tal's eyes. "If Jane Doe hurt Ryan then showed up again, if I really cared for her, I'd tell Jane Doe to get lost! If nothing else, just for hurting somebody I care for. Or is that it? Do I not mean enough to Ryan to have her stand up for me like that?"

"Now hang on," Eli counters calmly. "You didn't see her want to beat Alec to a pulp for what he did to you."

"And now? I'm glad she can forgive a man like him, but obviously I wasn't on her mind when she started falling for Alec all over again."

"Nobody said she-"

"Aw come off it," Tal growls. "If it had been nothing, she wouldn't have felt the need to apologize. It doesn't take a genius to put the pieces together! Alec came along and she still had some feelings left for him."

"Well she can't help it if-"

"If she decides to be good buddies with an ex that tried to kill her boyfriend?"

"She chose you!"

"After she had to stop and think about it? How long did it take for her to pick me over the guy that wanted me dead? Oh, and in the meantime, neither of you even have the decency to let me know what was going on so I'd at least have a fighting chance!"

Eli groans in frustration, trying very hard not to get riled. "Why are you focusing on the bad? Why can't you just realize that she chose to stay with you? So her heart wandered a little, but she didn't do anything wrong, and she did choose you."

"But it was hard for her!" Tal stalks to a nearby shelf for some plastic. "If you had an old flame show up and hurt Scarlet, then later she came back, would you even think twice about not getting involved with her again?"

Eli's eyes were angry, but he controls his tone. "No."

"And thus, the problem." Tal throws up his hands. "And Ryan just wants things to be all great between us now? Like nothing ever happened? If it was just an old ex, I might understand. But it's someone who hurt me. So either I'm off my rocker, or Ryan really doesn't care that I got hurt. And if she doesn't care that I got hurt... then I have a hard time believing she loves me."

"Look, you can't just-"

"Boys!" Sandy appears in the doorway, hands on hips. "What is with you? Take your personal problems off the clock!"

Both men grow quiet and get back to the car, a tense silence reigning again for several minutes until Eli speaks. "You have to be patient, Tal. Ryan and Alec had something special. Things like that don't go away overnight."

Tal's stomach was in knots as he works on covering a headlight. "And sometimes they never do."

Eli sighs and wanders to the front of the car to look down at Tal. "Don't you trust her?"

Tal focuses on his work before glancing up at his friend. "Would you?" 

Eli knew his pause spoke for him before he turns to go back to the rear of the car.

Tal nods. "Yeah. Can you blame me?"

"No. Does this mean you're breaking things off?"

"I don't know what it means. I love her, Eli. I just can't trust that she won't give her heart back to Alec all over again."

"How 'bout marrying her so she's yours?"

Tal glances up with a little smirk. "You think I haven't thought of that? But how can I ask her to marry me when I know that 'something special' still exists between her and Alec? Not that I think she can't bury it if she wants... but I want to be fair to her too. If she and Alec have something she and I don't... I don't want her to wind up unhappy a few years down the road, wishing she would have chosen Alec instead. And to be quite honest... I want her whole heart, not just the part that doesn't belong to Alec."

Eli continues to work for a few more minutes, mulling over this whole thing. He wondered if Ryan even knew the can of worms she'd opened. "There's always risk, Tal. Always."

"Doesn't seem to be with you and Scarlet."

Eli laughs. "She frequently goes out of town for weeks at a time. What's she doing while she's gone?"

"Well, working."

"Is that all?"

"I'd sure hope so."

"Me too. But I don't know for sure, do I?" Eli shrugs. "I just gotta trust she's not shopping around for other guys. Granted, I think I know her well enough now to tell if she was lying to me, but I never know a hundred percent, do I? I just choose to trust her."

Tal fiddles with a spot on the bumper. "So you're saying to trust Ryan after all this?"

"I'm saying you either gotta break up with her or trust her. It's gotta be one or the other. Otherwise you're gonna drive yourself insane... and me in the process too."

Tal sighs deeply before standing and waiting for Eli to finish before they would start painting. "She said if I needed some time, she'd give it to me..."

"And...?"

"I dunno." Since Scarlet was returning today, it was normal for her and Eli to be gone, which usually meant Tal would be at the apartment with Ryan, taking advantage of it just being the two of them. "I think tonight though, I better stay home."

...And the message left on Ryan's voice mail was simple.
"It's me, um... gonna stay home with my two girls tonight, so... yeah. Talk to you soon. Bye."

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