Help

Jason dabbed his lip again before nodding. Katie was probably right. Carson was going through a lot right now, and though Jason was in the mix because of his history with Misty, he and Carson had, surprisingly, been pretty civil about the whole thing until today. 

"Well, just to be on the safe side, I think I'm gonna stay out of his way for a while."

Noting that his lip was beginning to stop bleeding, he sighed and looked around the hall, not liking all the tension in the air. He wanted to see Misty, but knew it would probably be best to wait a while. He glanced back down at Katie and quirked an eyebrow. "You...wanna go check out the cafeteria with me? Grab a coffee or donut or something?" 


Alec appreciated Misty’s words, and the fact that she didn’t blame him – whether he still blamed himself or not. But when she mentioned another Banks, he couldn’t help the chill that ran down his spine. Surely she didn’t blame Carson for this…did she? He supposed if she really wanted to trace the steps back, she could wind up blaming him – after all, it was obvious this was the Agency’s doing, and had Carson been honest in the first place, perhaps everyone would be in a different place now. But even then, it was all just guesswork. Carson hadn’t called the thugs to come to the house. He hadn’t wanted the death of his unborn child. Yet…what Alec saw in Misty’s eyes now was something not easily thwarted. And he feared she really did hate Carson to the core.

Pushing aside those feelings, he returned a gentle squeeze to her hand, and forced the best smile he could. “Yeah…you get some rest, okay? I’ll let the others know to give you a break for a while.”

He stood, but still hesitated for a long moment, just looking down at Misty’s frail form. A terrible deed had been done here, and he could only hope that eventually, her heart’s pieces could be glued back together again. But sitting around and waiting was no way to accomplish justice. “I’ll see you again soon.”

Heading out into the hall, he almost ran into Reese. “Whoa. Sorry.”

“How’s she doing?”

Alec shook his head. “Not good. Okay. But not good. She needs to rest now. I said I’d keep the visitors away for a bit.” His eyes met Reese’s for a long, silent moment.

Reese cocked his head. “What is it?”

“Let me help. Please.” Alec’s voice was wrought with emotion. “I know…I screwed up. A lot. And I’m sure I’m not welcome anywhere near the Elite office, but…”

Reese’s eyes narrowed. “What are you asking?”

“Let me help find who did this. I can’t just stand idly by while everyone else is on task. Just…I promise I won’t cause any trouble.” His eyes begged Reese. “Can I just have access to a computer at the office? Let me dig a little for the sake of the case?”

Reese let out a long sigh, his expression one of mixed anguish for the situation, and mercy towards the young man. “I can’t promise everyone will be enthusiastic about your presence – know that. But yes – I’ll allow you back to the Elite base for the duration of this case.”

Alec struggled to contain his emotions. “Thank you. I’d like to get started right away.”

“Tomorrow. You need to be on your game. Rest, and give your head a few more hours to heal. Then come to the office in the morning….”


…To say it was strange to be here this morning would be a severe understatement. But motives were such that they would not keep Alec away. He stared at the Elite door for a few minutes before finally entering, remembering Reese’s mild warning that he might not be welcomed here.

Making his way across the main floor, it felt so familiar, yet so awkward at the same time. Though he could feel others looking at him, he made eye contact with no one, and was glad no one spoke to him. It wasn’t until he’d reached Sapphire’s cubicle that he stopped.

He hesitated before knocking on the short wall. It had been a long time since he’d seen her, let alone talked to her. “Um…Reese said he’d let you know I was coming… He thought it would cause less of a…disturbance…than working with your brother.” He gave Sapphire a bit of an awkward smile. “I…guess I just need a laptop and somewhere to sit.”


Scott leaned back in his chair and chewed on the inside of his lip as he watched the security camera screen he’d just pulled up on his computer. With all that had happened to Misty, horrors of being attacked were again fresh in his mind, making it hard to concentrate. Seeing Alec now, with his sister no less, made it even more difficult.

A wave of nausea forced him to regret having indulged on beef jerky for breakfast. Though his overall health had improved with time, his stomach remained quite sensitive, which was more irritating than anything, especially since his two favorite things – jerky and Mountain Dew – didn’t always agree with him. Not that it kept him from consuming them anyway though.

He finally reached to his keyboard and closed the window, trying to get his mind back on task with Dalton as they hunted for clues as to who had attacked Misty. “Find anything on the satellite surveillance footage?” 


“I’m pleased with your progress.” JT tucked his stethoscope in his pocket and folded his arms before offering Misty a gentle smile. He knew that it was her spirit that had been damaged the most, but he had to remain positive about her physical condition.

“I can’t say yet how long you’ll be here, but I’m confident that with a little time, you’re going to be fine. You just need lots of rest.” He glanced back towards the door. “I’ve…limited the number of visitors for now, because I know how easy it is to get overwhelmed, even when friends mean well. But, um...” He hesitated, but he’d made a promise to at least ask. “Carson…he hasn’t left since he got here and he wanted me to ask if you’d see him. It’s your call and no one else’s.”


Garret felt a new little pang in his heart, but he hid it well, just like always. Yet if one looked closely – very closely – in his eyes, they might see a flicker of dimness that was beginning to spread like black ink in a crystal pool. It had already begun to cloud his perspective on life. It had already begun to cloud his spirit.

“Feeling badly isn’t allowed.” He set aside his weapon and retrieved a rag to slowly clean off his hands. His voice held an icy edge, that might create fear in someone who didn't know him. His eyes continued to drift about, not landing on anything or anyone for more than a moment or two at a time.

“And even if it was allowed, all it does is create room for more pain.” He stood in preparation to clean up his mess and return the weapons to where they belonged. But he first dared to find Victoria’s gaze. “Yet your feelings also prove you’re still human, not yet molded completely into the monster’s robot. And that humanity…is why I love you.”

Feelngs...

Hearing Jason call her Hero Katie gives a soft smile. It had been a long time since she was called that, and just hearing Jason say it made her feel warm inside. Another little thing she'd keep to herself and get much joy out of it.

   "Nah, I think he's tearing apart himself more than anything else."

Katie looks to the waiting room for a long moment. She really did feel bad for Carson and wished things could be easier. He needed someone as much as Misty needed someone, and yet he was left with hardly anything.

   "We all deal with sadness a different way, maybe Carson's not sure what to do with that sadness and it just comes across as anger. I dont think He's really mad at you J."

Misty looks at Alec her eyes so full of sadness. How could he think this was his fault? He didn't know this was going to happen, and even if he was inside, it might not have changed anything. No this wasn't Alec's fault at all, and if she was to blame someone it would be maybe the same family, but a completely different person.

   "It's not your fault Alec."

Her voice was soft, sad, but she really did want him to know that this was not on him. The last thing she wanted was for Alec to blam himself. 

   "Please don't think it is. Your not the Banks that is to blame."

Shifting her hand to Alec's she gives it a soft squeeze before letting go and closing her eyes. She felt so tired, and alone even though Alec was right there and she new other people were in the hall waiting for her. This just all seemed like a dream.

   "I'm just going to rest. I feel so tired."

Taking the rifle Victoria started to check it. Looking busy was always a good thing around here, specially when she was talking to Garrett. How she wished though that there talks to be a little more normal. Less about work, not holding a gun, plan, or drink in her hand at the same time. This was normal and she longed for something more, never understanding why it just couldn't be. 

   "I'm sure it will be that last option. I've never understood why my Grandfather likes to do what he does, but it sure does never fail thats the option he goes with. Unless they really have worn out there usefulness, and  with Misty and Carson not being together anymore, that might possibly be an option."

Looking over Garrett's face for a brief moment Victoria can see something different behind the coldness. She wondered about it but did say anything. Movement out of the corner of her eye forced her to look back down at the gun.

   "I guess better dead, than alive to rune it for us all. I guess deep down somewhere..."

Victoria looks around for a moment as someone walks by before continuing to talk.

  "...I kind of feel bad for Misty."

She didn't know why she felt bad, but there was a pain in her own heart for the woman who lost her baby. Maybe it was losing her own mother that made her feel slight sympathy, but it something no one else would see, and she keep locked away.

Two More

Left alone, Carson sat for the longest time, just staring at the floor. Katie had calmed him, but his soul was still in so much turmoil. What was going to happen now? Nothing? Were he and Misty really supposed to never have a relationship again? He didn't want to think about it, but if he really wanted to know how she felt, all he had to do was recall that look she'd given him. Not only was she angry, but she blamed him. He knew it without asking. Without her saying so. 

How badly had she wanted a child? How many plans had she made? What hopes and dreams had she developed around having a baby? Had she been scared? Looking forward to it? He hadn't a clue what any of those answers were. All he knew was that deep down, he'd looked forward to being a father again...a father to the product of his and Misty's love. He didn't feel like father material, and he was struggling to connect with Mackenzie - raising a baby was something that, quite frankly, scared him. But he would have done it. He would have accepted it. He would have figured it out somehow and would have loved his child. Their child. And now...that was all gone. Maybe the baby would have helped reunite him and Misty. That chance was now gone. Just like that. 

The Agency had won again. 


"Thanks, Hero." The nickname rolled so easily off Jason's tongue that he hardly even realized he'd said it as he took the water and cloth from Katie.

Dabbing his lip, he rolled his eyes. "Well now... that was exciting. Is he tearing apart the waiting room?"


Alec shook his head and reached up with his free hand to brush Misty's cheek. "If you want to sleep, then sleep. Nobody will mind. You just need to rest so you can get out of this place, okay?" 

He cared. Oh, how he cared. And oh how much his heart ached. For more reasons than one. "Misty, I..." He stopped as his eyes fell. "I'm sorry." He swallowed hard. "If I woulda stayed inside a while longer or would have been more alert..." He shrugged. "I just...I'm sorry I wasn't there for you. None of this should have happened. I should have paid more attention and...I didn't. I wouldn't blame you if you thought this was my fault." 


Garret's arms cried out to hold Victoria. But, as always, he kept himself in check. Instead, he could just enjoy the brief moment her hand brushed against him. "I'm not sure what's going to happen now," he admitted. 

Reaching to the side, he picked up another rifle before handing it to her. She wasn't dressed for combat, but around here, it would not be strange to see her involved in checking weapons - at least while no important social events were happening - so this would give her some kind of excuse to stick around for a few moments. "Here. Look busy." 

He continued to work with his own gun, although his eyes kept track of every little movement in the near vicinity. "Your grandfather wanted that mother and child for some very specific plans. To have the child of Carson and Misty Banks...that would give him not only a good bloodline, but certain power, too." The names of Misty and Carson were nothing to sneeze at around here. They were well-known adversaries that Medridge loved to toy with. "And even though Misty lived, it doesn't look good for having another child of theirs in the future. As far as what's going to happen now..." 

The shots still echoed in Garret's ears. Two shots. Two lives. Two more, added to countless others. "The idiots have been taken care of." His voice had turned cold. It was the only way he could handle the stress - to let his coldness take over. "And your grandfather would rather see his adversaries dead than let them win."

His peripheral vision was the only gaze he'd afford to Victoria. "Which means he'll either tag the Banks family to get rid of them, or find new and exciting ways to torture them."

Maybe

Katie gives a small nod to Carson. She new he didn't want to leave, she didnt blame him, but she could tell at the same time he was trying to respect what Misty wanted too. Maybe she would come around, maybe after a little of the hurt had gone away she'd lean on Carson once again. There was lots of maybes but Katie left them unspoken. She didn't want to give false hope just in case.

   "I'll come back in a bit and see you. Hang in there Carson."

 Turning and leaving Katie hurrys down the hall to the others once again. Giving a smile to Jason she hands him the cloth and the water. She didn't see Alec anymore so she assumed that he was in with Misty right now, and that would give Jason some time to clean up.

   "Here you go J. It's the best I could do, and figure it was better than nothing. At least you can clean the blood off yourself. Last thing Misty needs is to know you got in a fight too."

Listing to Alec's words brought Misty a little comfort. It was extra nice to know he cared, and that he really was happy she was still there. Not that she ever thought he wouldn't but at the moment it was nice confirmation in his own strange way. 

   "Never know maybe the new people who would of moved into my house would of actually let you have a room in it."

Misty gives her best half smile trying to tease back, but knowing she lacked everything right now to actually make the joke funny. Everything hurt inside and out, so it was hard to find humor in anything even if she tried to force it.

Letting out a long sigh and leaning her head back against the pillow Misty looks twords the window as a few more tears escaped her eyes. She really didn't want to talk to anymore, but sooner or later she was going to have too. It might as well be sooner, than later and get it over with.

   "I don't mind if they come in. I might fall asleep on them though so I hope they wont mind."

Walking down the sidewalk Victoria's stride was slower with no one around. She'd heard what had happened, heck everyone heard what had happened in Nevada. And for a strange reason this time, it seemed troubling, her heart felt heavy. Not for the men they lost, but for the unnamed child that was lost, and the family that now had to suffer.

Looking up and seeing Garret, Victoria was at least happy seeing him took her mind off of wondering. He just always had that way about him, no matter the situation.

   "Ya know, I never liked Barrit, and Anderson anyways...and dont get me started on Rod. Maybe I'll get a little peace and quite now."

It was the truth She really didn't like them and Rod the most. How he'd slipped by thing long with all the flirting he's tried to do with her she had no idea.  Maybe he deserved to be stabbed she definitly wouldn't wast her tears over them.

Sitting down on the step for a moment she lets her hand fall down next to her and just brush Garret's leg for a moment, not letting it linger. It was the middle of the day and anyone could be watching. This was not the time to try and test the waters.

   "Any idea what my grandfather has planned now? I haven't seen him that angry in a long time, and I didn't dare ask him anything least I be next to the other shot. The quiet worry's me now, the calm before the storm!!!"

Blackened Soul

Carson might have resisted anyone else’s touch, but Katie was one of the few people he could trust. Instead of pulling away, he leaned into her just a little, his tense muscles automatically relaxing in her embrace. Other than Mackenzie, getting a hug was something he had not received in a very long time.

Katie’s words made sense, even in his troubled heart, and he nodded again as he straightened up. “Thank you…” He finally glanced her way, catching her eye. “That means a lot to me…it really does.” He took a deep breath and cleared his throat. “I wish everybody was as understanding as you. But…I guess that might not be possible, even under normal circumstances.” She’d always been understanding. Even if she hadn’t always agreed, she was one person he’d always been able to count on. And he appreciated it more than he could express.

“You better go help clean up Jason.” He gestured to the water and cloth in her hand. “I’ll um…I’ll just stay here a while. I won’t cause any trouble. Misty doesn’t want me around, so…” His eyes fell once more. “Yeah. I’ll just stay here.”


Alec squeezed Misty’s hand and gave her a little smile too. “The world might be a better place without an Alec Banks in the way, but it’s far from being able to survive without you.” He cocked his head. “So don’t ever think it would have been better if we’d lost you, okay?” His voice was still quiet. Still calm. But he didn’t like thinking about what would have happened, had she not made it. It was bad enough having lost the baby – to lose her too…he didn’t want to try imagining it.

“Besides…” A new quirky smile surfaced. “If you were gone, I wouldn’t have a place to live.” He knew her well enough to know that she’d get he was just trying to tease, because it was hard to him to actually say, “I care about you.”

“You’re gonna be okay,” he comforted. “I know it doesn’t feel like it, but…I know you, and I know it might take a while, but you’re gonna come out of this. I promise.” He lifted her hand and gave it a gentle kiss. He knew she was tired and probably would rather just rest than talk. “Some others are here. Wyatt. Reese. Up to you if you want to see anyone else, though.”


A new tension had formed. Something was off kilter. Something was wrong. More wrong than normal. One wasn’t usually able to hear beyond the house walls, but today, though words could not be distinguished, the loudness of arguing could easily be heard. Though evil deeds were done, tempers were usually kept in check with a professional reserve. But today, anger stirred into action. And an execution was inevitable…

…Garret sat on the steps of the ammunition house, cleaning his rifle. He usually did this kind of work inside, but today, the fresh air felt nice. Not that “nice” was a luxury often offered around here, but today it was one he chose. He had just put bullets through the heads of two men who had failed in their tasks. Failure – the ultimate route to death when working for Medridge. Failure to complete a job. Failure to do his bidding. Failure to comply. No kind of failure was ever acceptable or forgiven. Those two guys should have known better than to return here from such a sensitive case anyway. Returning…not returning. That wasn’t normally an option pondered…

Garret realized he’d sat motionless for several minutes before bringing himself back to his work, and he shook his head. He could be shot himself for just thinking the things he was. Yet the thoughts were retuning more and more often, creating an undeniable longing in the pit of his blackened soul.

Clicking the pieces of his rifle back in place, he held it up to his shoulder and gazed down the barrel. Catching a certain woman in his sight though, he lowered the weapon. And right there was another factor that tormented his heart.

Better Off...

Hearing someone else come into the room Misty was happy to see Alec even if her eyes really held very little emotion. She didn't feel like seeing many people right now, or talking, or answering questions but Alec, he was different. The brother she'd always wanted but never really had, The brother that was closer than her own. Alec was special to her, and she was happy he was ok.

   "Maybe in the end, it would of been better off if I had."

It sounded morbid, and extremely depressing but suicide was the last thing she was thinking about even if it came across that way its not what she meant. It was just hard to comprehend and handle her emotions at the moment. She felt so cold, so empty, more empty than she ever had before because now she was. 

Taking Alec's hand in her own Misty just looks at it for a long moment as tears well in her eyes once more like a never ending river. Playing with his fingers for a long moment she sucks in a breath in a failed attempt to try and collect herself. 

   "I'm glad you are ok Alec. I don't know what I would of done if something had happened to you."

Looking up at him Misty gives a small smile that is more of a lame attempt to prove she was ok. But it was all she could really offer right now if that.

   "Yes, I think an I'm sorry is in order to him, but at the same time I have a feeling he understands and is not going to hold it against you."

Jason might be hard to deal with sometimes, and thick headed, and maybe not like Carson all that much at the moment but she believed he still had a good understanding of what was going on and that Carson just took his frustration out on anyone he could. Laying a hand on his shoulder Katie's heart broke just a little more of her friend. Leaning down over him and letting her hand slide around him Katie just held him for a long moment in a big bear hug.

   "Of course this is better. It's because you are not a murderous crook that you feel this pain. This life we have...it doesn't come easy and maybe ours is a little rougher than most others, but thats what makes it worth living. Thats what makes the reward at the end of the tunnel seem so much better."

Letting go Katie smiles just a tiny bit maybe hoping to bring just a little bit of comfort to her friend she felt so bad for. Maybe just a little something for him to hold on to...a little hope as to not give up.

   "Never doubt who you are, never let them win, because thats what they want. You are a man with a big heart, unconditional love, a man who has seen the easy road and walked away from it. You are Carson Banks, and I am proud to call you my friend, no matter what your past might look like."

Better Off Then

Feeling a hand on his leg, Carson needn't look up. He knew instinctively who it was just by hearing the way she moved and how her quiet spirit felt when she was near. Her words made his heart ache so very much, though they did soothe as well. If she could see he indeed cared for and loved Misty, why couldn't Misty see it? Why couldn't anyone else? Why had everyone abandoned him when he needed them most? 

With his face still hidden, he nodded, all the while still trying to keep himself from breaking down and crying. "I'm sorry," he mumbled. Finally, he lifted his face, though wouldn't look at Katie. "I need to apologize to Jason," he admitted quietly. "I just..." He shrugged. He knew she'd understand he hadn't meant to hurt anybody - he'd just been so angry, and Jason was all wrapped up in it somewhere and it was just...easy. 

"Just tell me this is better." His voice was still quiet. Shaky. "Tell me this is better than the life I had before because..." He choked on his words as the tears finally spilled over. He couldn't help it. He just couldn't stop them any longer. "Because right about now, I'd... I think I'd rather be a murderous crook than live through this." He swiped at his eyes angrily and tried to stop the tears. "It wasn't supposed to be like this."


Alec slowly entered Misty's room and walked quietly to her before he sat on the edge of her bed and set a hand on her arm. "Hey." His tone was gentler than most people normally saw. "I just...wanted to see you. I had quite a scare when I thought I'd lost you..."

That's Love...

Jumping a little and giving a gasp as Carson hit Jason Katie was surprised. She hadn't expected that at all even though she new Carson was upset and beside himself. Sometimes it was just a lot easier to show anger and sadness than express it, so though Katie didn't expect it, she really wasn't all that surprised either. Her heart ached even more for Carson as he left. She'd had some hard times with Jason in the past, but nothing like this and she couldn't even start to try and understand how anyone felt. All she did know is her own heart hurt a lot for everyone, and it could only be ten times harder for those involved. And somewhere inside for maybe the first time Katie was happy her and Jason weren't connected.

Laying a hand on Jason's arm and giving a small nod to him Katie looks at his lip quick to see if he was ok. There was some blood but he'd survive. He was right though and a little clean up was in order before he went and saw Misty. The last thing she needed was to see more blood.

   "Let me see if I can get a cloth, and some water to rinse your mouth out with. I'll be back."

Turning Katie makes her way down the hall and turns the corner. Spotting some cloths she grabs them before making her own way to the waiting room to get a bottle of water. Entering and seeing Carson there Katie lets out a small sigh. She new he wanted to be left a lone but he was her friend, and she needed to know he was going to be ok too. 

Sitting down next to him Katie rests her hand on his leg for a moment. All words seemed stupid to say and asking if he was ok was even dumber in Katie's mind. Of course he wasn't ok, and there was no point in pretending so why even ask. 

   "You haven't lost all your friends you know, and I'm happy to see you here. It's nice to know you still care, and are still trying. That's love right there, to not let go when everything and everyone says you should. Even if the other person can't see it."

Letting out a small sigh Katie new she had to get back. She didn't care if the others new she was talking to Carson. He was her friend, and he always would be but she needed to get the cloths and water to Jason.

  "I'll be around for a while, so if you need anything ask.....ok?"

Fire

Misty's stare might as well have driven a stake right through Carson's soul, because that's what it felt like. There was a new coldness there. An anger. A hatred. Blame. And Carson knew that all those things were not aimed at the Agency, but at him. He would have tried to convince himself otherwise, but there was one factor that tipped him off. In that stare, one thing was lacking. There was absolutely no trace of love for him left. He had been living on pure hope that somewhere, deep down, a love for him still lingered, even if it were small. But in this moment right now, non existed. 

He straightened and swallowed hard, finding it difficult to think of any words. He wanted to comfort her. Mourn with her. Care for her. And none of it - absolutely none - was possible. 

Having her pull her hand from his, his eyes fell. He automatically started to reach for her again, but stopped. Though it took all of his willpower not to, he knew that at this point, his touch was not welcome. And apparently, neither was his presence. All he wanted to do was help and be there for her, and all she wanted was for him to leave. It didn't make sense and it didn't feel right. But it was fact. 

Slowly, Carson stood, though his eyes lingered on the woman he was losing. "Okay." His voice was but a whisper. "But it's not charity. I do care. And I do love you, even if you don't believe it." Oh how he just wanted to lean down and kiss her cheek. That's all. But instead, he turned and walked away. There was more than sorrow on his heart though. More than anguish. A burning flame had begun - one of anger. One of rage. Rage against the Agency. Rage against those who refused to understand him. Rage against circumstances beyond his control.

By the time he reached the hall, adrenaline was already surging through his veins. There were more people there now. Jason and Katie had joined the others. And it was Jason on whom Carson's fiery gaze landed first.

Jason wasn't sure all that had happened just now, but he truly was sorry about the circumstance and was hurting for Misty. The look on Carson's face was not easily interpreted, but Jason even felt genuine sorrow for him as well. The first words were the only words he could think of, after a slight nod hello. "I am so sorry." 

There wasn't any hesitation. Or if there was, no one noticed or even heard the curse that slipped out from under Carson's breath. For in the next moment, he had hauled back and with true aim, sent a punch directly into Jason's mouth. Taken so by surprise, Jason didn't even block or move out of the way, taking the full brunt of Carson's swing. Knocked off balance, he stumbled back into the wall, putting a hand to his already-bleeding mouth. 

Before Carson could even move another inch, Alec grabbed his arm and Reese stepped between him and Jason. "What in blazes do you think you're doing?!" 

Carson's glare shifted to Reese as he yanked his arm loose from Alec's grip. "Aw, rack off." 

"Hey!" Reese was not about to let this one go, and gave Carson a hefty whack on the chest to keep him in line. "We let you be here because I thought you were going to keep control of yourself." 

"You...you let me be here?" Carson's eyebrows rose, and he blinked. "Let me?" He pointed to Misty's room. "That is my wife in there!" Tears sprang into his eyes. "I lost a child today too, or does that not count?" His voice started to crack, but he kept himself in check. "I have lost everything. My friends, family, my wife, and now my child. And all anyone can do is keep pushing me away because they think they know better than me." The fire in his eyes glowed hot. "Hang all your condolences and sympathies. None of you want me here anyway." 

Shoving his way past Reese, he ignored all the others, and aimed for the nearby waiting room. He let the door fall shut behind him, and was glad to find the room void of other people. Sinking down in a chair, he leaned forward to rest his elbows on his knees, and buried his head in his hands. His body shook with adrenaline as he fought against his rage, his sorrow, his confusion and his misery. Never before had he faced this kind of trial, and he didn't know what to do. And never had he ever felt so alone. Being a part of the Agency...that had been better than this.

Back out in the hall, Jason wiped his bloody lip with his sleeve, and rolled his tongue around his teeth to make sure they were all still in tact. "Dang... I swear he's got knuckles made out of steel." 

Reese was still frowning. "You alright?"

"Yeah, I've had worse." Jason rolled his eyes. "I don't want to see Misty like this though - it'll just upset her."

Wyatt shook his head. "You two get into something recently or what?" 

"No." Jason knew better. As much as he wanted to lash out at Carson's actions, he just couldn't. "I'm just an easy target after everything that's happened." He glanced at Katie. "Guess I need to work on my timing. Or my evading skills." He wiped his lip again. "Maybe both."

Always Suffer the Most!

Hearing people come into her room Misty couldn't help but jump a little. She had heard, but it really hadn't registered much people were coming in there to see her. So many things floated in her mind, and it was hard to tell if this was all really, real or not. Carson's words bounce off her, and she doesn't even take notice for a moment his hand went into hers as she just looks past him at the others for a long moment.

Registering that Carson was there Misty looks back to him. Her eyes seemed so cold, so dim. Her sadness, her angry it was all his fault. If he hadn't had been dumb and messed up none of this would of happened.
  
   "It's not ok, nothing will ever be ok now and no one is safe. It wont ever be safe with stupid people who only thing of themselves in the world. It wont be safe with The Agency around, and its the good people who always suffer the most. It's the good people who don't deserve to be alone, who always end up that way!"

Misty moves her hand from Carson's as some tears fall from her eyes. If it had only been several months ago she would of welcome him there, she would of thrown her arms around him and cried on her shoulder. But now she didn't want him to be. He just reminded her of what she would never have, her family was destroyed, ripped apart, and the only one she could point fingers at was him.

   "Please leave...I don't want you here, and I dont want your charity. I'd rather have no one here at all, than someone who pretends to care."

Painful Assurance

As Misty’s scream filled the hospital hallway, actions of friends and family were faster than those of the nearby nurses. It wasn’t just another person in that bed – it was someone loved by more than one.

It was Wyatt and Carson both who made it to the doorway first, but one of them had to give. Their eyes locked, but Carson’s stare was strongest. “We’ve been over this once, mate,” he hissed. “Don’t make me repeat myself.” Entering Misty’s room, he left Wyatt behind, along with Reese and Alec, who stayed put. Not because they wanted to, but out of simple respect. And all, including Alec, were ready to intrude, should Carson’s presence not be wanted…

The day before…

Carson had just finished his morning run and was starting to get things going in the restaurant. Though not open until later, there was plenty to do every day before any customers arrived. The day felt…off kilter somehow. Not that any day was really all that great anymore, but today there seemed to be an unexplainable gloom hanging in the air – one that just made Carson’s mood all the more sour.

Hearing the bell on the front door, he sighed. This is why he always kept it locked until Thirteen or Aerith were supposed to come – couldn’t customers read the closed sign?

He emerged from the kitchen, ready to state his open hours, but seeing Alec, he stopped short. This was odd. “Hey…” Confused, he neared, immediately put on guard by the look on his brother’s face. Something was wrong. Terribly wrong. “Alec?” His approach was made more cautious. “What’s wrong?”

Alec swallowed hard. He obviously couldn’t hide the raw emotions in his eyes. “I thought I should come in person instead of call.”

Carson’s pulse quickened. “Alec…what happened?”

“Look, can we sit down?”

Carson took his brother by the shoulders. “What. Happened? Is it Mac? Misty? What?”

Alec chewed on the inside of his lip, perhaps a little sorry he’d volunteered for this. But he knew it was still best. And he also knew Carson would prefer hearing it straight. “Someone broke into the house last night.”

Carson’s hands dropped from Alec as his eyes widened in panic. “Is Misty okay?”

“She will be. But she was hurt.”

“How bad? Where is she?”

“She’s at the hospital. She…” Alec’s words trailed off as Carson was already on his way to grab his keys, and he rolled his eyes. “She was knifed. In the throat. She lost a lot of blood, but JT says she’s gonna pull through.”

Carson was already back and aiming for the door, but as he opened it, he stopped short and turned to look back at Alec again. A new and horrible thought had struck. “The baby…” His words were but a whisper.

Alec’s jaw tightened. The answer just wouldn’t come. All he could do was shake his head. “I’m so sorry.”

Tears sprang into Carson’s eyes, and he had to take a moment just to absorb the shock. He wasn’t sure whether he wanted to scream, pass out, get sick, or all three. He’d thought his heart could not hurt more, but he’d been wrong. Never had there been a pain anything like this – so deep that it went past pain into a numbness of his very soul. A single tear etched a trail down the side of his face. “Who was it?”

A chill ran down Alec’s spine, hearing the icy cold question. “We don’t know. But the Agency would be an awfully good guess.”

Carson took a deep breath to regain control, and he nodded. “You want to ride with me back to the hospital? Or maybe you should drive?”

“I shouldn’t. I’m still kinda dizzy.”

“Wait…are you okay?”

“Yeah. Just got conked on the head. I’ll be alright. Prolly shouldn’t drive though til I stop seeing double.”

“Right.” Carson finally stepped outside. His legs didn’t feel like he was even moving, but somehow…somehow he’d make it…

Carson had been met with opposition upon getting to the hospital. Though he still did some work for the Elite, he avoided the office as of late, due to all the ill feelings against him. Most relationships had not been mended, though he would always be grateful for the few that had forgiven him. Like Katie. But today, he was wanted by very few. Reese had been unhappy but respectful, while Wyatt had threatened to send him packing. Jason had not been thrilled with his presence, but was tolerant. Anyone else kept their distance. Carson ignored most, unwilling to leave. The sight of Misty lying in that bed was almost too much to bear, and more tears were shed than anyone else knew about. If only he could have been there for her. To protect her. And their child. Their child that now, they would never know. The child whom he had grown to love and look forward to, even if he’d never told anyone. The future was now even foggier than it had ever been before…

…Entering Misty’s room once again, Carson was by her bed in just three strides. “Misty?” His hand automatically went to grasp hers gently, his other palm brushing her cheek. “Hey…shh… it’s okay. You’re okay. You’re safe.”


Jason’s head snapped up quickly enough to give away the fact that he’d just been startled by Katie’s appearance. He’d been so lost in thought that he hadn’t even noticed anyone walking by, let alone her stopped at his doorway.

His eyes were tired, reflecting his heart that was pained with the recent events. Though he’d broken up with Misty, he still cared, and he was still saddened things had turned out like they had. He had a different kind of sorrow – it had not been his child she carried, nor had he had the hopes and dreams tied up in a future with the baby. His pain was simply that of watching his friend suffer.

“Hmm?” It took a moment to get his mind on task, and he finally shook his head. “Oh. Yeah, okay. I didn’t expect we’d find much. Thanks.”

Katie’s invitation took him a little by surprise, but ever since their recent chat over coffee, things seemed to have been better between them. Easier. Less stressed.

He let his eyes land on hers and linger there for a moment or two. She knew he was having a hard time with all this, and he appreciated her insightfulness…even if she couldn’t feel his emotions.

Blinking, he cleared his throat while he stood. “Fresh air sounds good, and I was planning on stopping by the hospital to see if anything had changed, so…yeah. That’d be great.” He grabbed his jacket and joined Katie in the hall. There would be no other witness to the wayward route of his hand – old habits died hard… as did the motion of his hand towards Katie’s shoulder. He caught himself before it reached its destination though, and he inwardly cringed before shaking it off. “Lead the way, driver.”

A Moment's Wish...

Somewhere caught between asleep, and waking Misty could hear talking. Words being thrown around her like lost, answer, saving, and baby. None of it made sense to her as she tried to wake herself a little more. Was this all just a dream, and none of this real. The last thing she remembered was hearing someone in the house. Shadows, falling, the smell of blood, and the fear that rushed over her. What had happened...

The next day...

Feeling the warmth of the morning sun on her face Misty rotates her head to the side and smiles watching Carson laying next to her fast a sleep. She liked watching him sleep sometimes. He seemed so at peace, and calm. It was one of the best ways to wake up. 

Looking back up at the ceiling Misty smiles, but soon it fades as a sharp pain coursed through her body shocking herself away. As her eyes open the sun light was gone, and she was in a white room, a hospital room. Her body hurt all over, slowly memories come back to her about what had happened, about the attack. 

Slowly bring her hand up to her neck Misty feels the bandages wrapped around her. How bad was it? Letting her hand fall from her neck it rests on her stomach. In only another split moment a wave of fear rushes over Misty. Her baby! There was no need for anyone to tell her, for she already could tell herself by the empty feeling she felt. The next thing to follow was a blood curdling scream, and than sobs. How could this happen....why could this happen? This was the one good thing she had left and now like everything else it was gone. Her baby was gone, and she didn't even know why, the only thing she new and she felt was sadness, hurts, more hurt than all over her body injuries combined, her hear was shattered, and for a moment Misty wished she hadn't lived either.

Leaning back in her desk chair Katie lets out a long sigh. The last few days had been deadly quiet at work and everyone new why. Nothing seemed the same anymore, hurt, sadness...it was so thick someone could cut it with a knife. Misty was family to everyone at work, all so close and now...one of there family members had been hurt almost beyond repair, and no one new what to do. This wasn't something that could be fixed. Psychical Misty would get better, but mentally Katie didn't think it would be so easy. 

Sitting forward again Katie runs her hands over her face and lets out a long sigh. She'd been working almost all night to try and fit what had happened together and why. But every ally she looks up came to a dead end. This was just another sick game played by The Agency but still it seemed different some how. 

Looking over her shoulder at the light on in Jason's office Katie new thats where he was. She felt bad for him too and couldn't imagine how he was feeling through this all as well. It was hard on everyone but Jason and Misty were so close even if they were just friends again. Getting up she heads that way and knocks gently on the door before poking her head into his office. 

   "Hey J. I just got done looking through those old files Reese had me on and I came up with more dead ends. He just told me to let you know whenever I found anything or not."

Pausing for a second Katie just studied Jason and her heart sank a little even more. It was hard to actually read him, but still she could just tell by looking at him it was hard. 

   "I was thinking of going to see Misty, I didn't know if you wanted to tag along. Figured maybe you could use a little time away from work, and fresh air too."

Suffering

Making sure there were no more threats, nor anyone nearby the house as a witness, the one dark figure slowly weaved in and out of the shadows, waiting for his partners to reappear. But when he heard the muffled sounds of a commotion inside, he waited no longer.

Entering the house, he was quick to see one of his partners groaning at the bottom of the stairs, along with Misty, who was also lying in a heap, bleeding and not moving.

"What happened?! Are you insane?!" The only response he received was word that Joe was dead, upstairs, and this whole thing had apparently been an accident. And an ugly one at that.

Kneeling next to Misty, he felt her pulse, finding it weak. "She fell down the stairs? We were supposed to bring her alive! Idiot!" His backhanded whack to his buddy emphasized his statement. "She's prolly gonna bleed to death, and who knows about the baby now?! There's no way I'm dragging her along - we'll just have to report the incident and hope we don't get shot ourselves for lousing this up."

Not bothering to really even check to make sure the other guy was alright, he hurried up the stairs to sling the dead body over his shoulder - they would not be leaving that kind of evidence. And besides, if they had their dead partner when returning to base, that would be the proof that something had gone terribly wrong. Maybe they could even say that Alec had been in the house. Yeah. That would work.

"Come on." Once back downstairs, he aimed for the door. "Let's get out of here before Alec comes to. With any luck, this chick will be dead by the time he does, and that'll at least be one more agent out of our hair."

Outside, Alec wasn't sure how long he'd been out, when his senses finally returned. His head was throbbing, and things were rather blurry, but he managed to pull himself to his feet. What on earth had happened? Who had attacked him, and why? Then a new thought struck him. "Misty." He squinted to the dark house, just as his ears picked up the sound of squealing wheels. "Oh, no... Misty..."

Stumbling half-blindly to the back door, Alec caught himself on the porch railing, almost falling over from dizziness. "Misty!" Where was she? Had she been attacked too? Making it inside, he fumbled for the light switch. Able to see a little better, it was only after he'd rounded the corner that he spotted Misty on the floor. "Misty? Can you hear me?" He knelt quickly by her side, the sight of all the blood making his stomach churn. He'd grown numb to blood - but not when it belonged to someone he cared about.

Realizing she'd been cut on the throat, he pressed his hand to the wound, trying to slow down the bleeding. "No, no, no...." This couldn't be happening. "Misty, come on... don't do this. Not now. Stay with me." Finding a pulse - though weak - was a small bit of relief, but he knew he needed to act fast.

Daring to leave her just for a moment, he grabbed the cordless phone and was right back at her side with his hand to her wound again. Blood was smeared all over his hands and clothes, and he didn't even know if all the blood on the wall down the stairs was Misty's or someone else's. For all he knew, someone else was still here, but he couldn't risk leaving her to search.

His thumb dialed 911. What happened after that would forever be a foggy memory of an incoming emergency team, an ambulance ride, blacking out, waking at the hospital, seeing Misty wheeled down the hall, and being forced to the ER himself for care...

..."I'm fine, just lay off, will you?" Alec swatted at the nurse's hand and slid off the bed. 

"You need a bandage on that," she scolded. "And sit down before you fall down - again."

Alec swayed unsteadily as the room spun, and he held onto the rail at the foot of the bed to keep from keeling over. Mild concussion. So what? He was fine. He already had a few stitches in his scalp - that was good enough. 

The nurse's arms went around him to force him to sit back down on the bed, and she looked at him sternly. "Your friend is in the O.R. with the best care possible - there is nothing you can do for her, so you might as well take care of yourself right now." 

Alec finally relented, his eyes falling as the nurse returned to cleaning around the stitches on the back of his head, and applying a small bandage. "Have you heard how she is?" 

The nurse sighed. "Not good." She set a gentle hand on his shoulder. "But they're doing all they possibly can..."

..."Alec?" 

Having eventually given in to resting, Alec was lying on the bed now, staring at the ceiling. A visitor though, startled him, and he looked quickly to the door. "Reese. Wondered when you'd get here."

Reese was dressed haphazardly in an old pair of jeans and a wrinkled t-shirt, his hair rather a mess, indicating he'd been in bed. "Yeah, I hurried as fast as I could. What on earth happened?" 

To say this was awkward would be an understatement, but this was too important to dwell on that factor. Alec pulled himself up to sit a little straighter, trying to get his brain to think straight. "I'm really not sure. I just happened to get up at an odd time and got ambushed soon as I stepped out of my shed. When I came to, I went in the house and found Misty at the bottom of the stairs, unconscious and her throat slit. I called 911, and when the team arrived, they swept the house and no one else was there, but they said it looked like someone else had been upstairs, but there's really no telling what actually happened til someone can go through and look for prints and test the blood." He took a deep breath and let it out slowly. "I'm sorry."

"For what?"

"This shouldn't have happened. I should have heard someone there sooner. I should have stayed in the house. Something. Anything. I should have been more careful about protecting her." 

Reese cocked his head. "You really do care, don't you?"

It had been a long time since Alec had seen Reese. Getting kicked out of the apartment the Elite had provided had been the last interaction. And that seemed like a lifetime ago. "Of course I do." Alec let his eyes drop. "She's...family." He shook his head. "This...getting ambushed...I should have listened to my senses. They never should have gotten as far as they did. Misty, she..." His sentence dropped off as he struggled to control his emotions. "She's in bad shape because I let my guard down." 

"No one could have predicted this." Reese moved closer to the bed. His eyes were filled to the brim with worry, but blame was absent. "Were you in on this?"

"What? Of course not!" Alec hadn't even considered being under suspicion himself. "Do you really think I was?!"

"No...I don't." Reese's tone was oddly stern. "My point is, you cannot take the blame for this. There's no way you could have known something like this would happen. If -"

He was cut off by JT's entrance into the room. "Reese? Alec?" 

Reese turned quickly. "I didn't know you were working tonight."

"Well, I wasn't." JT set his hands in his pockets. "But I'm on call for any Elite patients." He looked between the two men grimly. "I just came from working on Misty."

"And?" It wasn't an employer's concern coming through, but rather an uncle's worry. 

"And...she's alive." JT's voice was not very positive. "She lost an awful lot of blood." He looked to Alec. "You probably saved her life by seeing to her wound and calling 911 as fast as you did."

Alec swallowed hard. He didn't feel anything near to a hero at this point. "Is she gonna live?"

"I think so." JT nodded. "I can't be a hundred percent sure, and she's gonna be in ICU for a while, but...if I was a betting man, I'd say she'll pull through. It's just gonna take some time for her body to recover." 

Reese's mind had already jumped one step farther. "And...the baby?" 

JT pursed his lips before he finally shook his head. "The baby didn't survive."

Alec felt like his soul was being suffocated. 

"I think it was the fall," JT continued. "The paramedics said she'd fallen down the stairs. Aside from the loss of blood and the emotional stress, I'd say that the nature of the fall is what caused trauma to the baby. By the time Misty arrived here...there were no life signs and nothing we could do. This adds to Misty's physical condition, but the worst of that is over."

Reese leaned his hands on the foot of the bed, his stare glued to the floor. "Physically. But not emotionally."

JT's nod was solemn. "Agreed." He looked to Alec. "You're free to go any time, but my advice is to take it easy for a couple days, and if you experience any ill effects like bad headaches, dizziness or vomiting, come back in - otherwise, you should be safe to leave." He gestured to the hallway. "You can see Misty for just a brief few minutes if you like, though it'll be a while before she regains consciousness." 

"Thank you." Reese straightened and shifted his gaze to the ceiling. Once JT was gone, the silence was overwhelming. He eventually looked back down to Alec, and was surprised to see the young man's eyes held tears just beneath the surface. "You alright?"

Alec shook his head. "No. But I'm far better than Misty." He sat up and swung his legs over the edge of the bed. He'd been so excited. That little baby was going to be his niece or nephew. And Misty...though unexpected, Alec knew she's been looking forward to being a mother. Preparing for it. Getting excited about it. And now...it had been ripped from her grasp. Everything else had fallen to pieces - this had been the one precious thing still good. And now it was gone. "This is gonna kill her."

Reese was quiet for another few minutes. "Yes. It is. But I have confidence she will pull through. She's tough. And this is one of the hardest things she'll ever face...but she'll survive. I know it."

Alec knew he was right. Misty wasn't the first to go through this. But it didn't make it any easier, and Alec hurt the most for her. "Who's going to tell Carson?" 

Reese pursed his lips. "I will, unless you feel it would be better coming from you."

Alec nodded. "I'll tell him. I'll stop by and see Misty, then I'll head his way." By now it was early morning. "He'll be at the restaurant already." 

It wasn't long before many others from the Elite had been called, including Katie, whom Reese called himself. They had not lost Misty, but this was a hard blow for all of them. It was a big issue that the baby was lost, and it was a big issue that someone had gotten this close and had attacked again - with no clue as to why.

Fear

It was a restless night like most nights had become for Misty. So the little sleep she did get was anything but sound. Hearing a creek caused Misty to strain and listen. It was more than likely Alec moving around the house but something seemed off. The weight of the steps were different and almost as if there were two sets. A wave of fear washed over her and it was that moment she new all was not well.

Slowly reaching over into her night stand Misty grabs the knife that she kept there close by. Trying to let her eyes adjust to the darkness was proving to not work so well in her groggy state and the shows of two figures go over looked. Before Misty can even react a hand covered her mouth and two people were leaning over her.

Trying to get out of the situation she was now in Misty acts fast and brings the knife that was still in her hand up. Hearing the first thug yell Misty new she'd hit her mark. She didn't know where, or how bad but she'd at least did some kind of damage. Bringing her hand around Misty takes a stab at the next thug except harder. Hearing him yell, a low gargle, and than his buddy yell Misty new that was a bulls eye. Jumping out of bed Misty runs for the door. Feeling someones hard around her ankle Misty falls with a thud. A million things ran though her mind, not only was her life on the line but so was her unborn child and it made her heart thump even more. Reacting again Misty brings her free leg up Misty takes a swift kick to the thugs face.

Scrambling to get up again Misty trys to catch her breath before letting out a short yell for help. With any luck Alex would be awake still and hear. If they didn't expect him than maybe they could grain the upper hand. She was really in no condition to be fighting, or fending off anyone. Taking to long Misty feels a hand around her wast and the bland of a knife to her neck.

   "You killed Joel. That was probley the last thing you wanted to do. I don't think our ride is going to be as comfortable as expected now."

Feeling a tear run down her face Misty didn't know what to do next. Sharp pains coursed through her body, and her mind ran a million miles an hour.

   "Let me...go."

She could act tough but inside she was scared, and it had been a long time since she had felt this way. Being pushed forward twords the steps Misty had no idea where they were going, or what would happen next. Trying to escape again could kill her, but not resisting, and going where ever would more than likely end with her dieing as well. Either was it was a risk, but getting away seemed like a better one.

Bringing her food up behind her Misty kicked the thug in the worse place possible.  Feeling the knife slip across her throat Misty new she'd been cut, but how deep she didn't know. Worse was the feel of falling forward and no ground coming. Grasping for anything to stop herself from falling Misty pulls the thug down the steps with her. Hitting hard on a step on her side, but she couldn't catch herself as she hit her head on the next step, and kept falling, before she even reached the bottom her whole body had gone numb. From loss of blood already, to head trama and the worst of all was not feeling any pain at all just laying there pool of her own blood that was only growing larger by the minute, the thug she'd dragged with her dead in a slump.

In the Night

Though watching Ashlee leave, Eric’s ears still listened to Stacy. “Could’ve fooled me. That was ‘bout as close to a cold shoulder as I could’ve gotten.” It bothered him that Ashlee was being so offish, but he tried to shrug it off. “Maybe she’s just tired.” Was that really it? Or had he unintentionally done something really wrong? It wouldn’t be the first time he’d messed something up. 

He polished off his lasagna and sighed deeply. He was full. He was satisfied. He was exhausted. His eyes found Stacy’s, and he smiled. “Well, if no one will go on a midnight ride with me…maybe I can find somebody to at least go for a walk…”


Rosalyn read Chad’s text message for the third time, the tears still rolling slowly down her cheeks. She lay on her bed, but was still fully dressed, boots still on. She’d left Clint a while earlier and instead of eating supper, she’d gone to be by herself again. Chad’s message had arrived at least an hour before, but she still had yet to answer him. She missed him. But she couldn’t allow her emotions to be public. She had to keep them all inside, locked away tight, for fear of making her life – and anyone else’s here – worse, due to her own father’s temper. 

Her eyes scanned Chad’s words. She hated believing that he was really genuine – that his care for her was true. She hated hoping in something that couldn’t possibly be reality. Yet, if he really weren’t genuine, surely he would have given up by now. She was being beyond difficult – if all Chad wanted was a good time, he had a whole lot of easier opportunities than her. 

Eventually, her fingers found their way to her phone’s keyboard. 

To: Chad
From: Rosalyn

You’re such an eloquent clown, and I miss you so. Surely your travels aren’t as grand as they sound – my 
imagination likes to exaggerate. But I suppose even the greatest dream is worth dreaming, even if when I wake up, I find it gone.

Maybe pretending this was all real really was foolishness, but it did bring a smile to her face. And right now, a smile was what she longed for. Maybe it really was her imagination that there was something real between her and Chad, but at this point, all she had were dreams. 

I’m sorry if it’s seemed I’ve been ignoring you. I’ve just been busy.

There was no point in making Chad worry or feel bad about her current situation.

I’d dearly love to someday join you on your travels and see what you do. It sounds fascinating.


“Well, I could think of a few things to ask for,” Jared teased. “But this will do quite nicely.” He grinned and tried to readjust his weight, but his muscles didn’t cooperate, and he sighed. “Ya know… one of these days, I’m gonna get awfully tired of not being able to do what I wanna do.” Though he rolled his eyes, it was impossible to hide in his gaze the fact that deep down he really was incredibly frustrated and teetering on the edge of depression, even though he pasted on a smile and acted like he was doing just fine. He had made incredible progress since the accident, but even so, the time it was taking did nothing to help his impatience. 

“I feel bad for my mom,” he admitted. His voice had grown quieter with the sudden change of subject. “She shouldn’t have to take care of me like a kid – she already did that for enough years when I was growing up. But here I am… Now that I actually don’t want to mooch, I have to. Go figure.” He tossed Grace a wry grin. “Maybe it’s some form of sadistic poetic justice.”  

He nudged her arm again with his foot. “But I suppose there are some perks.”


Alec rolled over again for the umpteenth time, his eyes staring into the darkness of his cozy shed. His life had changed so much. First a boy searching for acceptance in all the wrong places. Then a young man trapped by Agency talons. Later a man with no heart, hungry only for that which made him feel more powerful than those around him. Then he’d been caught that fateful night at Scott’s. He’d been shown a completely different world. Someone had cared. 

He rolled over again. Ryan had been the first to break through his barriers. He’d wanted freedom so badly, and she’d understood, yet kept him grounded at the same time. Life had become a whole new struggle between right and wrong – what he wanted, and what he was learning was true. He’d messed up. A lot. He’d lost the trust of the only woman he’d ever really loved. And he’d gotten snatched up by the Agency again, forced to do their will, and in the process, he’d successfully severed ties with love permanently. Only after all the pain and all the rejection of others had he finally broken. But lessons were learned far too late. 

He threw his blanket off and huffed a frustrated sigh. Misty had been the only one with any care still left, and he would be forever grateful. Slowly, slowly, he was starting to mend other relationships he had so carelessly demolished. But some would never be built back up again. And on nights like tonight, it still hurt. From a boy who knew no love, to a man who had tasted and lost. He wasn’t sure which was worse. 

Growling, he slid down from the sleeping space in his shed and pulled on his jeans. He couldn’t sleep. Maybe a walk in the night air would clear his head. As he went for his door though, movement outside his window caught his eye. Immediately, his whole body tensed, and reflexes sent him ducking out of sight. His better senses told him it was probably the neighbors dog, but his hairs standing on end warned him otherwise. And again, he felt the sense that something tonight was not right. 

Weaponless, he cautiously opened the shed door. His eyes scanned the yard, but he saw nothing. Maybe it really had been his imagination. One step forward though, and all he knew was that he’d been struck on the back of the head. But no amount of will power could keep him from slumping to the ground and losing consciousness. 

Inside the house, were two more figures that moved along the shadows, finding their way silently from room to room, speaking only in whispers. Not finding their prey, they made their way carefully upstairs. With only two rooms to search, it was easy to finally find what they were looking for. 

Leaning over Misty’s bed, one of the tall men dressed in black and wearing a ski mask slipped a hand over her mouth to keep her from screaming when she awoke. “Rise and shine, princess,” he sneered. “You’re coming with us.”

Wind....

Looking up at Alec Misty gives the best smile she could thought she new it was not much. Laying her hand over top of his she lets out a small sigh. He was a good guy, and he was trying his best to make her happy, and try to put a little smile on her face. She hated how low she felt, she hated how much hatred she felt, and she hated not being herself. No matter how hard she tried though the truth remained she was angry, she was hurt, and she hated one person for it.

   "Ok Alec. Thanks for the subs tonight, they tasted good. Try and get some rest. At least one of us needs to be alert tomorrow when Mackenzie gets here."

Letting her hand drop from Alec's Misty looks down at her hardly eaten sub. She'd taken a few bites before feeling full. It had tasted good like she said but hungry just didn't seem to hit her tonight.

Once Alec was gone Misty finally moved from the couch and went to the kitchen. Wrapping up what was left of her sub she placed it in the fridge with the other left overs. She'd either eat it later, or Alec would and that was ok with her. At least nothing went to wast.

Looking out the window in the back Misty just stairs at the light the flickers in Alec's shed. She wanted to pull herself from this darkness but it was so hard and she felt so lost and helpless. She hated Carson loved Jason, was mad at Jason, despised Carson. A vicious circle of emotions she wish she didn't have.

Pushing off the counter Misty makes her way up stairs. She was tired, drained of emotions and all she wanted to do was sleep now. Mac would be here tomorrow, and she wanted to try at least for the childs sake to act a little happier than she was now. Maybe a little extra rest would help her feel better in the morning.

Giving a small smile Ashlee went back to poking at her food. Eating a little more she finally pushed the plat away before excusing herself. She just didnt feel that hungry. She really did want to go riding tonight, but something stopped her. Maybe she sould talk to Eric about it but something just held her back.

Watching her daughter leave Stacy felt as confused as Eric looked. She didn't understand what was going on with that girl, and when she tried to ask her last all she got was a quick nothing and a subject change. 
  
   "I don't know what is going on with that girl. I thought for sure she'd be happy you were home. She missed you something horrible while you were gone."

To: Rosalyn
From: Chad

When the warm wind blows it feels like your breath on my skin...
And when the stars twinkle it reminds me of your eyes...
For everywhere I look I am reminded of you...
Everywhere I go I think I hear your voice and turn my head.
My wind, My sun, My flower!

I haven't heard from you in a few days and I hope all is well.
Still travailing but that should come to and end soon. At least 
for a few week before we finish our tour. I wish you could
be here. I know you'd love it as much as I do. One day you 
will have to come, and be free!!! 

With Every Emotion in my head, Chad!

Grace just shakes her head as she listened to Jared ramble. She didn't mind it though it was better than being quiet, or depressed. She rather liked his silly babble. It made her smile and laugh.

   "I think sitting here for a few moments sounds rather nice. It's not to bad of a afternoon. I've got some of the best company to chat with. I mean really...what more could you ask for?"

All I Can Promise

Ashlee’s response threw Eric for yet another loop. What young girl wouldn’t jump at the chance for an adventurous midnight horseback ride? Let alone one who was as horse crazy as Ashlee?

“Oh. Okay.” He shrugged, not sure what else he could say. He wasn’t going to push it if she didn’t want to ride. Maybe she really wasn’t feeling well. Or maybe he really had done something unintentional to put her on edge around him. He shot Stacy another glance though, questioning the strangeness of it all. He wanted to believe nothing was wrong, but his gut said otherwise.

“I’ve got a couple days before I hit the road again…but if you change your mind about tonight, you’ve got til midnight. ‘Course, if you wait that long, you’ll prolly hafta wake me up. These old bones ain’t gonna last much longer than that.” He smiled, but it felt rather pointless. It was a strange sensation – suddenly not knowing if he’d done something wrong, or if there was another reason for Ashlee’s distance.

He turned his focus back to finishing his meal, and engaging in conversation with a few others, including Stacy. It was good to be home, despite Ashlee’s odd behavior.


Clint shrugged on his jacket and let the shop door fall shut behind him before he trudged across the driveway. He wasn’t sure if he wanted to go grab something to eat or just go home. He knew Wendy and Chase were with everyone else for supper tonight, but as of late, it wasn’t unusual for Clint to just go his own way and connect with them at home later.

Passing by the main house though, a lone figure on the porch swing caught his eye. He wasn’t one to interfere – if someone wanted to be left alone, he had no problem with that. And yet… Caring more than he might admit, he stepped up on the porch before sinking down next to his sister. Neither spoke for what seemed a very long time, until Rosalyn finally broke the silence. “How ya doing?”

“I’m alright. You?”

“I’m fine.” She tucked her hands in her jacket pockets and kept her eyes on the darkness surrounding the ranch. She’d eventually come back from the orchard and retrieved her jacket from inside, but no one had seemed to notice, and she was okay with that.

It was quiet again except for the soft creaking of the swing as Clint’s foot gently maneuvered it back and forth. A slow sigh eventually seeped out though. “You happy?”

“No. …You?”

“No.”

There was another long stretch of silence.

“What are we gonna do about it?” Perhaps Rosalyn really didn’t expect an answer, but it was a question that felt heavy tonight.

“I dunno.” Clint shrugged. “Keep on living, I suppose.”

Rosalyn  pursed her lips as she thought. “At least you’ve got a family.”

“Yeah.” He nodded slowly. “If not for them, I’d be long gone.”

“If Dad wasn’t such a jerk, would you say the same thing?”

Clint thought for a long moment. “Yeah.”

“What changed?”

“Me.”

It was quiet again. Rosalyn leaned over to rest her head on her brother’s shoulder. “I’m sorry things aren’t turning out like you wanted.”

“They’re sure not. Can’t change it now, though.”

“Aren’t you and Wendy okay?”

“Yeah.” Clint kept the swing’s gentle pace. “Some days I feel too tied down. But I wouldn’t give her or my kid up…I love them more than life…which is why I’m still here.”

Rosalyn fell silent as a tear trickled down her cheek to soak into Clint’s jacket. Once more, the darkness provided the hushed atmosphere until Clint decided to speak again. “You miss him?”

“Yeah.” Rosalyn sniffed. She didn’t have to ask who her brother meant. Chad was on her mind every day. “I thought I could ignore it…but I can’t. And I don’t even know if it’s real. But I can’t even find out because I’m stuck here.”

Clint’s heart ached with a mix of sadness and anger. “Are you really?” 


Jared’s lips curled into a somewhat sly grin as Grace came and joined him. With his one leg now resting on her lap, he moved his bare foot to nudge her arm playfully. “Goofing off is always more appealing than work – you should know that by now.”

He scrunched up his nose a little bit though. “But yeah, I guess I sorta maybe did more than I was supposed to.” He waved a hand in the air. “But I couldn’t stand it any longer. I am so….so….SO tired of seeing the insides of those walls, I think I might be starting to go just slightly insane.” His eyes widened. “Or maybe more than slightly. Maybe a lot. Who’s to tell? A crazy person doesn’t usually know how crazy they really are, do they?”

He let his eyes fall on hers. “They say ignorance is bliss though, so if you really think I’m losing it, don’t tell me. Unless I’m like annoying crazy. Then you can tell me. But let me down easy when you do.”

He bit his lip to stop his ramble. “Sorry. Too much coffee. All I want is to get –” He cut his sentence short, as another wave of his arm was too much, causing a sharp spasm in his back. His whole body tensed, and he cringed, holding his breath until it had passed. “…out of here…” He let the air out of his lungs slowly before giving her a sheepish grin. “Or not. Can I just…not move for a minute or two?”


Bree’s question sent a pang to Gunner’s heart. She wasn’t out of line. It was a perfectly appropriate thing for her to ask after what he’d done. The pain came from his own guilt – guilt that he’d messed up badly enough for her to worry about it happening again. He couldn’t blame her for this hurt he felt.

A deep breath preceded a sigh just as deep before he tightened his hold on Bree. Pulling her as close as he could, he let her head rest on his shoulder, and closed his eyes as he drank in this feeling…this feeling of holding in his arms the only one he’d ever cared for like this.

Though silence reigned for several minutes, his voice did finally surface. “I can’t promise I won’t make mistakes,” he answered quietly. “I can’t promise that I won’t want to run away, or that I’ll never fail you.” A tear made its way to the surface, and he closed his eyes, fighting these mixed emotions.

“I can’t promise I won’t mess up, or even that I won’t do anything stupid to hurt your feelings,” he continued shakily.  

“All I can promise is that I’ll try. I’ll try to be the man you deserve. I’ll try to focus on what’s really important. I’ll try to do all that’s humanly possible never to lose your love.”

He drew back a little and kissed her forehead. “You are the most important person in my life, and I don’t know what I’d do without you. I…know I ran away…but nothing made sense again til I started thinking of you. I just…need to remember that more quickly when I hit rough spots.”

Finally in a little more control over his feelings, he tilted his head so he could see Bree’s face again. “I’m…ready…to admit I’ve got a problem. I want my life back. I want to go back to work…and I want things to be okay between us.” 


“Eh…I dunno.” Jason shrugged. He was leaned back in his office chair with his feet up on his desk, surrounded by work, but allowing a break to talk to his friend. Besides, it was almost time to go home anyway.

Con hadn’t been seen much at all at the Elite office lately, but with Reese having left him at least ten phone messages, he’d finally relented and come in to see what he wanted – not that he didn’t already know, but so far he’d stood firm in his decision not to return to his job here. “So you haven’t talked to her since?”

“Oh…yeah. Some. I mean, we’re getting along okay I guess. She said she’s not mad at me – just hurt, and I can’t blame her for that. It’s still kinda awkward, but I guess I’m hoping we can end up being good friends again. I miss having her to talk to.”

“Give it time,” Con assured. He stretched out his legs as he sat in the extra chair. “Misty’s going through more than just you breaking up with her.”

“Yeah. She’s on a major warpath with Carson, especially since he’s the reason for my decision. All that just makes me feel worse, though.”

“Do you still feel you made the right choice?”

“Yeah.”

“Then don’t take on extra guilt. You can’t control what happens to her or what decisions she will make.”

“I just want to help. So I walked away. Makes a whole heap of sense.”

“You walked away from a deeper relationship, not from being a friend. Right now, it’s in her hands. You’re doing all you can.”

Jason slowly nodded. He was grateful for Con’s council, as always. “Thanks. At least Alec doesn’t seem too upset with me. We’ve been texting, and while I don’t think he understands, he respects my decision, so we’re cool. I hadn’t expected that, so I’m glad for it.”

“I haven’t been to Mom and Pop’s in ages. How’s Carson?”

“Not good, but that’s all I know. You’re not the only one who hasn’t been there in ages. After everything went down, most of his friends walked away – understandably so.”

Con sighed. “Yeah. It’s sad though. How close are they to getting the divorce?”

Jason scoffed. “Who knows? Carson still hasn’t signed the papers. Unless something changes, Misty may never be free. Even after seeing how alone she is now without me, he hasn’t relented.”

“Think Carson is being mean or just stubborn in his efforts?”

“I really don’t know.” Jason’s eyes dropped. “But…as much as part of me would like to say he’s just being mean…my gut says he’s sincere. I think he’s fighting tooth and toenail to keep Misty in his life.”

“Well…can’t blame him for that.” Con cocked his head. “And you and Katie?”

“What?” Jason’s gaze flew up. “What do you mean?”

Con chuckled. “Nothing. Just wondered if you were getting along, that’s all.”

“Oh. Yeah…yeah, I think we are. I think maybe…she and I can be friends again.” Jason nodded. “And…I’m looking forward to that.”

“Good. Well, if you –”

“Jason?” Reese’s voice over the intercom interrupted Con. “Is Con still in your office?”

Jason threw his friend a grin. “Yeah.”

“Conrad, are you ever going to come see me like your promised? I gotta get going in twenty minutes.”

Con lifted an eyebrow. “Did he just tell me to come see him?”

Jason nodded. “Yeah. You’ve got twenty minutes before you can get out of here.”


Alec crumpled up his napkin and finished off his Pepsi before looking to the other end of the couch at Misty. He’d brought subs home for supper after work for a treat, but now that the meal was over, it was his routine to go to his own place out back. He sighed, his eyes remaining on Misty. “Well…I guess I’m gonna go hit the sack early.” It had been a long day, and as of late, there had been little to discuss between them. Every day, he wished he could help more, but there was simply nothing he could do. He hated the tension. He hated how things had gotten so messed up with Carson, and then Jason, too. Though a little time had passed, the pain lingered, and all Alec could do was watch Misty try to find her way through it all.

He reached over and set a hand on her shoulder. Things felt...strange tonight, and he wasn't sure what it was. It was almost as if a storm was coming, but he couldn't put his finger on it. “If you need anything…let me know, alright?”