Worry

    "I can understand where your coming from. Sometimes its easier when something bad happens to look at it as revenge, karma, or something they deserve than to feel bad. Specially when its someone who has wronged us in the past. It makes us angry that we are feeling bad, so instead we try to justify it was ok."

Dalton leans back in his chair and lets out a sigh. He could really only image how Scott felt but with his own reasons he understood how he felt too. He'd dealt with many people who'd wronged him in life and the pain and anger that went along with it was not easy to deal with.

   "But that can turn us bitter to the world, and thats not way to live. Sooner or later we just need to let go. Easier said than done, but its a must if we want to live on."

Having Alec here would not be easy for Scott, so now was him time to try and take his mind off it. That's what best friends do.

   "Now, pass me something to drink. I'm dieing over here. I mean look at me, I'm withering away."

Once JT was gone from the room Misty rolled onto her side bringing her legs to her chest and wrapping her around them burying her head into the pillow. She was alone, alone in everything, like always. Maybe forever she would be. Weeping into the pillow Misty just let the tears and screams come. Thats all she would do till she just cried herself to sleep. Maybe when she woke Alec would be there again.

Dancing with Garret was sometimes rare at these events but when it happened Victoria was in heaven. She smile was genuine, but one would know what because she faked smiles with everyone who danced with. It was the closest they would ever get in public and sometimes her heart just wanted to scream and it was the only time she could show it a little more.

Something was different tonight though. She felt almost like something was wrong. As the music stopped, and she heard Garrets words trail off, her heart started to race. It was not like him to talk like this, not here.

   "I'd love you no matter what too, and though sometimes we are far apart, it makes coming home that much better. If you weren't here I don't know if I could survive."

There was more that Victoria wanted to say but as the music stopped so did her words. It never got easier, and never became more fair. Giving a small smile to Garrett and a slight curtsey thanking him for the dance.

   "Meet me later to talk more? You have me worried."

Walking back and forth in the office Rosetta continues to wait on hold with the feed store. She had dreaded asking them to extend there credit but it was the slow months and they needed more supply. There payments were almost always on time so she only had hope that they would. 

Passing the window Rosetta stops and takes a few steps back looking out again. A small gasp came forth as she watched Mick and Eric. For a moment she was upset. Mick new he shouldn't ride like that anymore. But than seeing the smile on his face Rosetta could be mad. He looked....happy. Something she hadn't seen in a long while.

   "Ms. Henson, we can extend your credit one more time with us but after that we wont be able to anymore."

Not really even fased by the voice on the other end Rosetta gave a nod like it could be felt from the other side of the phone and than hung up placing it down on the desk and heading for the door. Heading twords the barn Rosetta couldn't help her own little smile. She wanted to be mad, but couldn't be. 

   "Mick Henson....You do realize Angel will have your head if she saw you right? You are lucky, I don't."

Hearing a noise outside Ashlee goes to see what was going on. Watching Mick and Eric race drew her out even more. How it must feel to fly on a horse like that, and they were both good too. A small smile forms on her lips as she continued to watch. She new Eric could ride, but she didnt know he could ride this good. She wondered if she'd ever be that good, but than shed have to ride for that to even be possible.

Winds of Change

Scott nodded absentmindedly, only half listening to Dalton. "Interesting, isn't it?" He clicked through a few items on his computer. "The way things circle back around, I mean."

He had to turn his head to see Dalton with his good eye. "I got attacked in my home by Alec. Now he's on the other end." His gaze fell and he swallowed hard. "Guess maybe it's kinda hard to feel bad for him is all. Misty didn't deserve this but..." He shrugged. "I know it's wrong, but there's part of me that's not at all bothered Alec got a taste of his own medicine."

His focus remained downcast. "I don't like the way it makes me feel, but I guess maybe I'm not as good in the forgiveness department as I thought."


Alec was a little surprised at Sapphire's willingness to help, regardless of Reese's orders. "Thanks. I...appreciate it."

After grabbing an extra chair, he joined Sapphire in her cubicle and set to work on her laptop. It felt a bit strange - not only being here in the Elite office again, but working this closely next to her. At least someone trusted him to a certain degree. He still felt like an outsider though, and he was pretty sure nothing could ever gain him back any sort of position here.

Focusing more on the task at hand, Alec aimed first for a bunch of files that would catch him up on recent cases Misty had been involved in. It couldn't hurt, and he was so far out of the loop, he needed to make a starting point somewhere.

Minutes turned into hours, and Alec's attention rarely diverted from the laptop. He could feel it when others passed by the cubicle, and could sense their questioning eyes, but he wouldn't look up. He didn't need that distraction right now. This was about Misty, and he was going to help find the attackers.

Stretching his arms high, he realized just how stiff he'd become, and his back and shoulders ached. Not to mention, his eyes. He had a notepad full of scribbled memos as he pieced together his own theories, but so far he had no strong leads. Not that he expected to this soon - they'd be lucky if they could trace the men inside of a month.

Needing to move his legs, he left the cubicle without saying anything, but was back within a few minutes. He came up behind Sapphire and reached down over her shoulder, setting a can of Mountain Dew in front of her before he silently sat down again with his own can. It wasn't all that long ago, he wouldn't have thought twice about anybody doing anything for him. But now...now he knew that Sapphire didn't have to let him sit here - she could have set him up in some corner somewhere that he wouldn't bother anyone. But she hadn't, and he genuinely appreciated it.

He took a long swallow of pop and stared at the computer screen once more. Nothing was adding up, and it was already getting frustrating. But his eyes moved to his notepad. Sector Seven. He'd jotted that down earlier, then had dismissed it, but it continued to haunt him. He traced over it with his pen again. And for a moment, he questioned what he'd be willing to sacrifice to solve this case. But he already knew. Misty was family, and he'd give his life if he needed to.


“Okay, okay, it’s fine.” JT held up his hands in quick surrender, not wanting to upset Misty any more. “I just said I would ask, that’s all. I won’t let anyone in here you don’t want to see.” He’d hold to that promise. No matter his opinion of the whole situation, his job here was to make sure Misty recovered, and having her continually upset by Carson was not going to help. 

“I’ll see you again later. Try to rest.” JT headed out into the hall, and immediately aimed for the waiting room where Carson had seemingly taken up residence. 

Seeing JT again, Carson straightened in his seat, ready to get up, but JT waved him down. Carson’s shoulders dropped. Again. “She said no?”

JT nodded as he tucked his hands in his pockets. “Look, I don’t know all the details, but what I do know is that the mere sound of our name is upsetting to Misty. I’m sorry. I know you’re just worried and you care, but as her doctor, I can’t keep asking her if she’ll see you. It would probably be better if you went home.” 

Carson’s eyes fell. He didn’t even have the strength to argue. 

“She’ll be fine,” JT assured. “It’s going to take time, but I’m predicting a full recovery. You don’t need to worry.”

“But I just…want to see her.”

JT’s eyes showed compassion, and his tone softened. “I know. But if you really want to do what’s best for her, then you need to create some distance, okay?”

Carson nodded slowly. “Okay.” He’d try not to ask again. But he wasn’t ready to leave just yet.


Garret knew well enough to let the subject of him and Victoria drop. The more they spoke aloud their feelings, the more they risked. So instead, he simply nodded at her question. “I will. I’ll be on duty as usual, but I’ve made it so I’ll be nearby.” 

He dared give Victoria a sidelong glance with what might possibly be considered a hint of a smile – but that’s as far as it went. Yes, he’d intentionally lined up watchmen, placing himself in the center room for the sole reason of being able to be around Victoria, if only to see her from a distance. “See you later.” 

For now…he needed to finish this task, get cleaned up, then see to Medridge as he’d been summoned earlier…


“…Sonya Hashamita.” Medridge tossed a bulging folder onto his desk. 

Garret, dressed smartly for that night’s banquet, remained standing in the center of the office. “Yes, sir?”

“You have visited her off an on for two years now, have you not?”

“I have.” Sonya was one on a short list of woman to whom Garret was assigned to…retrieve information. And generally that meant a weekend stay with said women – long enough to get them to talk without scaring them off. 

“Then why have you yet to discover where her superior’s warehouses are located?” 

Garret’s eyes narrowed slightly, but he dared not reveal irritation. “Her tongue is not easily loosened. It took a long time to gain her trust.” 

“Time…time is what I detest the most.” Medridge took his cane and wandered to the grand map on the wall. “In two week’s time, you’re going to Miss Hashamita again. And you will access the information I desire, by whatever means it takes.”

Garret inwardly cringed. “Yes, sir.” 

“And when you’re through, you will destroy all evidence.” 

Garret knew exactly what that meant…and it meant just how it sounded. This would be his last visit to Sonya. And it would be Sonya’s last day. “Yes, sir...”

…It wasn’t much later, and Garret, though still and always on duty, had been allowed a short reprieve amidst the guests – more of a privilege than anyone knew, as he was honored by Medridge himself to dance with his granddaughter – a rare occurrence. It was hard not to hold Victoria closer – to caress her face and lean in to the sweet smell of her perfume. But with one hand in hers and one on her waist, it was more than he usually got, and it had to be enough. 

His smile had to be kept professional, as there were many eyes in the room tonight, but his lips curled slightly to prove he enjoyed this brief moment with the most beautiful woman in the room. Yet his eyes…the darkness had grown, and was threatening to snuff out the spark. 

“I’m being sent out in a couple weeks again.” He kept his voice low, as his body language portrayed nothing but a man enjoying the evening. His grip on her hand tightened just a little. “If…anything should ever happen to me…should ever our parting be our last…” 

The music fading away forced him to stop and clap. He had only moments before Victoria would be traded off to the guest of honor for the next dance. “Just remember I love you,” he whispered. “Even if thousands of miles separate us…my feelings will never change.”


“Well, I wish I had an answer.” Mick leaned against the corral fence, his eyes on two new horses Sparky and Dylan had picked up at an auction the week prior.

“Me too.” Eric shrugged and picked at a sliver on the fence rail. Morning chores were done and there was plenty of other work to do, but instead, he’d found himself out here. “Just wish I knew if it was something I did. Or maybe I’m just moving too fast. Am I?”

Mick gave him half a grin. “You and Stacy are none of my business, but I don’t think so. And last I could tell, Ashlee adored you.”

“I’ve been home three days and only have three more before I’m gone for a month, but I’ve hardly seen a smile out of her. She won’t do anything but give me one-word answers and shrugs. She won’t even ride with me. And Stacy apparently doesn’t know what’s wrong either. I just…”

Mick cocked his head. “You just what?”

“I dunno. I feel silly it bothers me this much, but if we’re wrong and Ashlee really doesn’t want me dating her mom anymore, then I’ve got a real issue. I won’t go any further if I’m just gonna cause trouble.” 

“I understand and I’d feel the same – it’s not silly. But you might just have to let whatever it is work its way out of her system. Who knows? She’s a teenager – it could just be crazy hormones and she might not even realize she’s acting strangely.”

“I suppose you’re right.” Eric sighed, trying to get his mind on something else, and gestured to the two young mares. “So these the newest residents?”

“Mm-hmm. Half-sisters according to the previous owners. I’d say they’ve got Thoroughbred in them, looking at their build. What do you think?”

“Agreed.”

“Someone said they both had some good speed under them.”

“I wouldn’t doubt it.”

Mick nodded, still looking at the mares. “It’d be a shame to turn around and sell them without finding out.”

Eric gave his brother-in-law a sidelong glance. “Don’t even think about it, old man.”

Mick chuckled. “Who are you calling old? Besides, you and I both still got it.”

“Oh, sure.” Eric hadn’t gone any faster on a horse than a gentle canter - maybe a slow gallop - since his accident so many years ago. Besides, Static was a great horse, but he wasn’t a racer. “You put me in an English saddle again, I’d prolly fall off after three strides.” 

“Nah…I think you’d be surprised. I mean…that is…if you’ve got the guts.” 

“Guts?!” Eric turned to look Mick square in the face. “It ain’t got nothing to do with guts. It’s got all to do with this body of mine that could fall apart just by looking at how hard that ground is. Been there done that, and I was in my prime.” 

“And your point is…?” Mick’s eyes wandered back to the mares. “They look like they could be a lot of fun.”

“No.”

“Just once.”

“Nu-uh.”

“What else you gonna do but sit around and mope?”

“Rosetta would kill you if she knew you wanted to go out for a  joyride. Your bones are just as brittle as mine.”

Mick’s eyes twinkled mischievously. “So she won’t know. And neither will Stacy ‘cause she’d prolly kill you, too.”

“And don’t forget about Angel – you know she wouldn’t like me doing that sort of thing with this leg of mine.”

“Oh sure, sure. You’re right. We shouldn’t do it…”


“…What on earth are we doing?”

“Three laps.” Mick adjusted his weight in the English saddle.

Eric shook his head as he tightened his reins on the anxious mare. “That’s not what I meant.”

“I know.” Mick grinned and nodded to the open field in front of them. “Three times around.”

“And the winner?”

“We’ll figure that out later.”

“What about the pile of brush at the other end?”

“Better go over it, or I’m adding ten seconds to your time.”

Eric’s mouth twitched. “Ready?” He rose just slightly out of the saddle.

“Set.” Mick pulled his hat down harder on his head.

“Go!” 

At the barn, Dylan stopped his work with the pitchfork to look out the open back door. Seriously? Was that really his dad and Eric on those two new horses? Racing around the field? Yep. And they were going fast. Really fast. Dylan had seen them warming up in the corral a few minutes ago, but had just thought they were giving the horses some light exercise. Apparently it was more than that.

Eric leaned low over his mount’s neck, feeling her mane whip his face as the wind rushed past his ears. Out of the corner of his eye, he could see Mick running neck and neck with him. As the pile of brush came up, both men urged their horses on, and up and over they went. Mick’s cowboy hat went flying, but it was ignored. The horses raced on down the long stretch, around the corner, back to the start and on to the second lap.

Dylan’s pause at the door caused some of the others to stop their work as well, wondering what he was looking at. Jeff came up beside him, his eyebrows raised high. “Really?”

Dylan didn’t take his eyes off the field. “Uh-huh.”

It was Sparky’s voice next. “What are those two numbskulls doing? They’re gonna break their necks.”

Jeff smirked. “At least they’ll go out happy.”

This kind of racing was almost always frowned upon if not banned completely, but there they were, taking the horses out to prove nothing other than the fact they were still alive.

And they did feel alive.

All Eric would hear was the wind and pounding hooves. The hard leather reins felt so natural in his hands, as if just yesterday he’d been on the racetrack. His eyes were barely slits as he focused on their route before pulling back, shifting left and driving ahead again. He’d just pulled to the inside to skirt past Mick on the far turn.

Mick was smiling, though still very focused as Eric sidled past. His mount had more in her though, but he held her just behind Eric, saving that last ounce of energy for the home stretch. Mick had ridden fast many times in the last few years, but it had been a very long time since he’d pushed this hard for the fun of it, and he hadn’t done it with Eric since their track days. There was something surreal about it. Something precious. Something he didn’t want to give up. Not yet. 

As Dylan watched the two riders, perhaps he wasn’t even aware of the quiet pride gently pushing forth deep in his soul. That was his dad out there. He’d heard sotries of their younger days and racing, but seeing it was something different. His dad was a good rider. Real good. And it was more than obvious in this moment. Not only that, but it looked like he was having fun. Dylan rarely saw his dad let loose and have fun, let alone in the saddle, so this…this was a new experience.

The horses raced on, up and over the pile of brush for the third time, and down towards the home stretch. Mick pushed his mount hard as he pulled up beside Eric once again. Nose to nose they ran, both horses straining to win. As they approached their original starting point, neither slowed. Only after shooting out the gate did both men stand tall in their saddles to pull back hard and rein in the horses. They slowed to a much gentler gait and circled a few times before gradually bringing the horses down to a trot then a walk. The riders were possibly just as winded as the horses, which made their laughter even funnier.

“Who won?” Mick asked between gasps for air.

Eric shook his head and leaned on his horses’ neck. “I…have no idea.”

“Aw great… We’ll have to do it again.”

They both continued laughing.

“Least you didn’t fall off,” Mick pointed out. “You can say what you want, but you still got it.” 

Eric shrugged off the compliment. “Yeah, well…I did keep my hat. You gotta go find yours.”

Mick grinned and rolled his eyes. “The walk will help this girl cool off.” As he turned to head back to the field, Eric came up alongside him. 

“I’ll help. Wouldn’t want you getting lost.” 

It didn’t take them long to find Mick’s hat, and by then, the horses had their breath back…as did Mick and Eric. 

“I’m not gonna be able to walk for a week,” Eric muttered under his breath as they rode back to the barn.

Mick snickered. “Better hide it. Wouldn’t want the ladies to make fun of you.” 

Finally back at the barn, both came to a stop and slid off their horses only to find more than one person staring at them. Neither realized just what a spectacle they’d made of themselves.

Never Again

Katie gives a small smile at Jason's humor but new at the same time it was more than likely the best thing for right now with Carson. He was dealing with a lot and she new how it was when emotions ran high. Our bursts were bound to happen, and it would be taken out on the person closest to you.

Sticking her hands in her pockets and looking around for a long moment Katie didn't see anything better to do. She really didn't like hospitable, and standing around in one waiting made her uneasy. She wanted to see Misty, but maybe for now walking till it was time was the best option.

   "Maybe I'll grab a coffee but I doubt I'll find anything more than that. I'm tired of hospital food, it never improves."

Watching Alec leave Misty lets out a long studded sigh as tears started to sprint into her eyes again. She was alone in the room once again. Alone...maybe that was what she deserved, her punishment for her own crimes she commented so long ago. Rolling over on her side, her back to the door Misty continues to sob as she curles up in the bed. Dread, dispare was all she felt.

Hearing the knock on her cubical wall Sapphire sits up with a start. Looking and seeing Alec she remembers Reese letting her know this morning that Alec would be in and she was to help him. She didn't mind to much, she got along with Alec when he was here before.

   "Oh ya ya thats right. He told me this morning but I was thinking more about being out of Moutain Dew than what he was talking about.."

Sapphire gives a small smerk. Some days it just happened when her mind wondered and she though of everything but work.

Reaching over to the table along side her Sapphire takes a bunch of the paper work and puts it into a plastic bin. That was stuff she was meaning to go through anyways and most of it was probley not to important anyways.

   "Here you go, you can sit here, and use my lap top. I just dont have an extra char so just grab one from one of the empty cubicles.  If you need any help just let me know. I'm pretty much free all of today to help."

Watching Scott out of the corner of his eye Dalton continued to type away at his computer. His little friend didn't need to say anything, he didn't need to express his feelings, Dalton could already tell what was going on. This had to be hard for him, everything that was going on from Misty, to Alec being here it had to be hard and he wondered how Scott was keeping it together as good as he was. If it had been him he wasn't all that sure if he could or not.

   "I haven't found much yet. I got some facial hits off of the traffic cam outside Misty's house, and than I got some matches going east, but the car they were driving just vanished after that. I know there is a underground parking lot that way, so I am running a scan to see what cars left that area within a fifteen min time frame. Might be worth checking it out if they dumped the car there."

   "I'll never be fine. Not anymore."

Misty stairs up and slowly blinks her eyes letting a few more tears escape. She admits she wasn't thrilled at first about having a baby. It's not something she'd expected at least not yet but after the shock wore off, after she'd heard the baby's heart beat, she'd become more and more excited. No one new either, she'd found out only a week ago that the baby was a girl. It was her little princess. She'd been excited to tell people but when everything with Jason had happened it just slipped her mind, and now...now it was so hard to deal with let along talk about. Her little girl was gone before she even got a chance to breath life. How did someone deal with that.

Hearing Carson still wanted to see her brings Misty back, and her face goes from sad to anger and she can't help the tone in her voice. The more she thought about him, the more than anger ran through her from everything that happened.

   "NO I don't want to see him. I already told him I dont want to see him. I dont know why he'd think I would change my mind!!!"

Victoria couldn't help the small smile that lingered on her lips for just a moment. Anything longer than that and she'd fear someone would see it and suspicion would be raised. No one was safe here, to exempt from the rules not even her.

   "It's these moments I feel like nothing else exists. You words comfort me, and I wonder...if I'll every be able to find joy in them, or if we are doomed to hide them away and never really be as one."

Looking down at the ground for a moment Victoria lets out a small sigh that most people would not be able to notice. Sometimes Victoria hated this, this hiding but she new it was how it had to be even if she didn't like it. 

   "I guess I better get back to the house. There is a big party tonight. Will I see you there?"

Help

Jason dabbed his lip again before nodding. Katie was probably right. Carson was going through a lot right now, and though Jason was in the mix because of his history with Misty, he and Carson had, surprisingly, been pretty civil about the whole thing until today. 

"Well, just to be on the safe side, I think I'm gonna stay out of his way for a while."

Noting that his lip was beginning to stop bleeding, he sighed and looked around the hall, not liking all the tension in the air. He wanted to see Misty, but knew it would probably be best to wait a while. He glanced back down at Katie and quirked an eyebrow. "You...wanna go check out the cafeteria with me? Grab a coffee or donut or something?" 


Alec appreciated Misty’s words, and the fact that she didn’t blame him – whether he still blamed himself or not. But when she mentioned another Banks, he couldn’t help the chill that ran down his spine. Surely she didn’t blame Carson for this…did she? He supposed if she really wanted to trace the steps back, she could wind up blaming him – after all, it was obvious this was the Agency’s doing, and had Carson been honest in the first place, perhaps everyone would be in a different place now. But even then, it was all just guesswork. Carson hadn’t called the thugs to come to the house. He hadn’t wanted the death of his unborn child. Yet…what Alec saw in Misty’s eyes now was something not easily thwarted. And he feared she really did hate Carson to the core.

Pushing aside those feelings, he returned a gentle squeeze to her hand, and forced the best smile he could. “Yeah…you get some rest, okay? I’ll let the others know to give you a break for a while.”

He stood, but still hesitated for a long moment, just looking down at Misty’s frail form. A terrible deed had been done here, and he could only hope that eventually, her heart’s pieces could be glued back together again. But sitting around and waiting was no way to accomplish justice. “I’ll see you again soon.”

Heading out into the hall, he almost ran into Reese. “Whoa. Sorry.”

“How’s she doing?”

Alec shook his head. “Not good. Okay. But not good. She needs to rest now. I said I’d keep the visitors away for a bit.” His eyes met Reese’s for a long, silent moment.

Reese cocked his head. “What is it?”

“Let me help. Please.” Alec’s voice was wrought with emotion. “I know…I screwed up. A lot. And I’m sure I’m not welcome anywhere near the Elite office, but…”

Reese’s eyes narrowed. “What are you asking?”

“Let me help find who did this. I can’t just stand idly by while everyone else is on task. Just…I promise I won’t cause any trouble.” His eyes begged Reese. “Can I just have access to a computer at the office? Let me dig a little for the sake of the case?”

Reese let out a long sigh, his expression one of mixed anguish for the situation, and mercy towards the young man. “I can’t promise everyone will be enthusiastic about your presence – know that. But yes – I’ll allow you back to the Elite base for the duration of this case.”

Alec struggled to contain his emotions. “Thank you. I’d like to get started right away.”

“Tomorrow. You need to be on your game. Rest, and give your head a few more hours to heal. Then come to the office in the morning….”


…To say it was strange to be here this morning would be a severe understatement. But motives were such that they would not keep Alec away. He stared at the Elite door for a few minutes before finally entering, remembering Reese’s mild warning that he might not be welcomed here.

Making his way across the main floor, it felt so familiar, yet so awkward at the same time. Though he could feel others looking at him, he made eye contact with no one, and was glad no one spoke to him. It wasn’t until he’d reached Sapphire’s cubicle that he stopped.

He hesitated before knocking on the short wall. It had been a long time since he’d seen her, let alone talked to her. “Um…Reese said he’d let you know I was coming… He thought it would cause less of a…disturbance…than working with your brother.” He gave Sapphire a bit of an awkward smile. “I…guess I just need a laptop and somewhere to sit.”


Scott leaned back in his chair and chewed on the inside of his lip as he watched the security camera screen he’d just pulled up on his computer. With all that had happened to Misty, horrors of being attacked were again fresh in his mind, making it hard to concentrate. Seeing Alec now, with his sister no less, made it even more difficult.

A wave of nausea forced him to regret having indulged on beef jerky for breakfast. Though his overall health had improved with time, his stomach remained quite sensitive, which was more irritating than anything, especially since his two favorite things – jerky and Mountain Dew – didn’t always agree with him. Not that it kept him from consuming them anyway though.

He finally reached to his keyboard and closed the window, trying to get his mind back on task with Dalton as they hunted for clues as to who had attacked Misty. “Find anything on the satellite surveillance footage?” 


“I’m pleased with your progress.” JT tucked his stethoscope in his pocket and folded his arms before offering Misty a gentle smile. He knew that it was her spirit that had been damaged the most, but he had to remain positive about her physical condition.

“I can’t say yet how long you’ll be here, but I’m confident that with a little time, you’re going to be fine. You just need lots of rest.” He glanced back towards the door. “I’ve…limited the number of visitors for now, because I know how easy it is to get overwhelmed, even when friends mean well. But, um...” He hesitated, but he’d made a promise to at least ask. “Carson…he hasn’t left since he got here and he wanted me to ask if you’d see him. It’s your call and no one else’s.”


Garret felt a new little pang in his heart, but he hid it well, just like always. Yet if one looked closely – very closely – in his eyes, they might see a flicker of dimness that was beginning to spread like black ink in a crystal pool. It had already begun to cloud his perspective on life. It had already begun to cloud his spirit.

“Feeling badly isn’t allowed.” He set aside his weapon and retrieved a rag to slowly clean off his hands. His voice held an icy edge, that might create fear in someone who didn't know him. His eyes continued to drift about, not landing on anything or anyone for more than a moment or two at a time.

“And even if it was allowed, all it does is create room for more pain.” He stood in preparation to clean up his mess and return the weapons to where they belonged. But he first dared to find Victoria’s gaze. “Yet your feelings also prove you’re still human, not yet molded completely into the monster’s robot. And that humanity…is why I love you.”

Feelngs...

Hearing Jason call her Hero Katie gives a soft smile. It had been a long time since she was called that, and just hearing Jason say it made her feel warm inside. Another little thing she'd keep to herself and get much joy out of it.

   "Nah, I think he's tearing apart himself more than anything else."

Katie looks to the waiting room for a long moment. She really did feel bad for Carson and wished things could be easier. He needed someone as much as Misty needed someone, and yet he was left with hardly anything.

   "We all deal with sadness a different way, maybe Carson's not sure what to do with that sadness and it just comes across as anger. I dont think He's really mad at you J."

Misty looks at Alec her eyes so full of sadness. How could he think this was his fault? He didn't know this was going to happen, and even if he was inside, it might not have changed anything. No this wasn't Alec's fault at all, and if she was to blame someone it would be maybe the same family, but a completely different person.

   "It's not your fault Alec."

Her voice was soft, sad, but she really did want him to know that this was not on him. The last thing she wanted was for Alec to blam himself. 

   "Please don't think it is. Your not the Banks that is to blame."

Shifting her hand to Alec's she gives it a soft squeeze before letting go and closing her eyes. She felt so tired, and alone even though Alec was right there and she new other people were in the hall waiting for her. This just all seemed like a dream.

   "I'm just going to rest. I feel so tired."

Taking the rifle Victoria started to check it. Looking busy was always a good thing around here, specially when she was talking to Garrett. How she wished though that there talks to be a little more normal. Less about work, not holding a gun, plan, or drink in her hand at the same time. This was normal and she longed for something more, never understanding why it just couldn't be. 

   "I'm sure it will be that last option. I've never understood why my Grandfather likes to do what he does, but it sure does never fail thats the option he goes with. Unless they really have worn out there usefulness, and  with Misty and Carson not being together anymore, that might possibly be an option."

Looking over Garrett's face for a brief moment Victoria can see something different behind the coldness. She wondered about it but did say anything. Movement out of the corner of her eye forced her to look back down at the gun.

   "I guess better dead, than alive to rune it for us all. I guess deep down somewhere..."

Victoria looks around for a moment as someone walks by before continuing to talk.

  "...I kind of feel bad for Misty."

She didn't know why she felt bad, but there was a pain in her own heart for the woman who lost her baby. Maybe it was losing her own mother that made her feel slight sympathy, but it something no one else would see, and she keep locked away.

Two More

Left alone, Carson sat for the longest time, just staring at the floor. Katie had calmed him, but his soul was still in so much turmoil. What was going to happen now? Nothing? Were he and Misty really supposed to never have a relationship again? He didn't want to think about it, but if he really wanted to know how she felt, all he had to do was recall that look she'd given him. Not only was she angry, but she blamed him. He knew it without asking. Without her saying so. 

How badly had she wanted a child? How many plans had she made? What hopes and dreams had she developed around having a baby? Had she been scared? Looking forward to it? He hadn't a clue what any of those answers were. All he knew was that deep down, he'd looked forward to being a father again...a father to the product of his and Misty's love. He didn't feel like father material, and he was struggling to connect with Mackenzie - raising a baby was something that, quite frankly, scared him. But he would have done it. He would have accepted it. He would have figured it out somehow and would have loved his child. Their child. And now...that was all gone. Maybe the baby would have helped reunite him and Misty. That chance was now gone. Just like that. 

The Agency had won again. 


"Thanks, Hero." The nickname rolled so easily off Jason's tongue that he hardly even realized he'd said it as he took the water and cloth from Katie.

Dabbing his lip, he rolled his eyes. "Well now... that was exciting. Is he tearing apart the waiting room?"


Alec shook his head and reached up with his free hand to brush Misty's cheek. "If you want to sleep, then sleep. Nobody will mind. You just need to rest so you can get out of this place, okay?" 

He cared. Oh, how he cared. And oh how much his heart ached. For more reasons than one. "Misty, I..." He stopped as his eyes fell. "I'm sorry." He swallowed hard. "If I woulda stayed inside a while longer or would have been more alert..." He shrugged. "I just...I'm sorry I wasn't there for you. None of this should have happened. I should have paid more attention and...I didn't. I wouldn't blame you if you thought this was my fault." 


Garret's arms cried out to hold Victoria. But, as always, he kept himself in check. Instead, he could just enjoy the brief moment her hand brushed against him. "I'm not sure what's going to happen now," he admitted. 

Reaching to the side, he picked up another rifle before handing it to her. She wasn't dressed for combat, but around here, it would not be strange to see her involved in checking weapons - at least while no important social events were happening - so this would give her some kind of excuse to stick around for a few moments. "Here. Look busy." 

He continued to work with his own gun, although his eyes kept track of every little movement in the near vicinity. "Your grandfather wanted that mother and child for some very specific plans. To have the child of Carson and Misty Banks...that would give him not only a good bloodline, but certain power, too." The names of Misty and Carson were nothing to sneeze at around here. They were well-known adversaries that Medridge loved to toy with. "And even though Misty lived, it doesn't look good for having another child of theirs in the future. As far as what's going to happen now..." 

The shots still echoed in Garret's ears. Two shots. Two lives. Two more, added to countless others. "The idiots have been taken care of." His voice had turned cold. It was the only way he could handle the stress - to let his coldness take over. "And your grandfather would rather see his adversaries dead than let them win."

His peripheral vision was the only gaze he'd afford to Victoria. "Which means he'll either tag the Banks family to get rid of them, or find new and exciting ways to torture them."

Maybe

Katie gives a small nod to Carson. She new he didn't want to leave, she didnt blame him, but she could tell at the same time he was trying to respect what Misty wanted too. Maybe she would come around, maybe after a little of the hurt had gone away she'd lean on Carson once again. There was lots of maybes but Katie left them unspoken. She didn't want to give false hope just in case.

   "I'll come back in a bit and see you. Hang in there Carson."

 Turning and leaving Katie hurrys down the hall to the others once again. Giving a smile to Jason she hands him the cloth and the water. She didn't see Alec anymore so she assumed that he was in with Misty right now, and that would give Jason some time to clean up.

   "Here you go J. It's the best I could do, and figure it was better than nothing. At least you can clean the blood off yourself. Last thing Misty needs is to know you got in a fight too."

Listing to Alec's words brought Misty a little comfort. It was extra nice to know he cared, and that he really was happy she was still there. Not that she ever thought he wouldn't but at the moment it was nice confirmation in his own strange way. 

   "Never know maybe the new people who would of moved into my house would of actually let you have a room in it."

Misty gives her best half smile trying to tease back, but knowing she lacked everything right now to actually make the joke funny. Everything hurt inside and out, so it was hard to find humor in anything even if she tried to force it.

Letting out a long sigh and leaning her head back against the pillow Misty looks twords the window as a few more tears escaped her eyes. She really didn't want to talk to anymore, but sooner or later she was going to have too. It might as well be sooner, than later and get it over with.

   "I don't mind if they come in. I might fall asleep on them though so I hope they wont mind."

Walking down the sidewalk Victoria's stride was slower with no one around. She'd heard what had happened, heck everyone heard what had happened in Nevada. And for a strange reason this time, it seemed troubling, her heart felt heavy. Not for the men they lost, but for the unnamed child that was lost, and the family that now had to suffer.

Looking up and seeing Garret, Victoria was at least happy seeing him took her mind off of wondering. He just always had that way about him, no matter the situation.

   "Ya know, I never liked Barrit, and Anderson anyways...and dont get me started on Rod. Maybe I'll get a little peace and quite now."

It was the truth She really didn't like them and Rod the most. How he'd slipped by thing long with all the flirting he's tried to do with her she had no idea.  Maybe he deserved to be stabbed she definitly wouldn't wast her tears over them.

Sitting down on the step for a moment she lets her hand fall down next to her and just brush Garret's leg for a moment, not letting it linger. It was the middle of the day and anyone could be watching. This was not the time to try and test the waters.

   "Any idea what my grandfather has planned now? I haven't seen him that angry in a long time, and I didn't dare ask him anything least I be next to the other shot. The quiet worry's me now, the calm before the storm!!!"

Blackened Soul

Carson might have resisted anyone else’s touch, but Katie was one of the few people he could trust. Instead of pulling away, he leaned into her just a little, his tense muscles automatically relaxing in her embrace. Other than Mackenzie, getting a hug was something he had not received in a very long time.

Katie’s words made sense, even in his troubled heart, and he nodded again as he straightened up. “Thank you…” He finally glanced her way, catching her eye. “That means a lot to me…it really does.” He took a deep breath and cleared his throat. “I wish everybody was as understanding as you. But…I guess that might not be possible, even under normal circumstances.” She’d always been understanding. Even if she hadn’t always agreed, she was one person he’d always been able to count on. And he appreciated it more than he could express.

“You better go help clean up Jason.” He gestured to the water and cloth in her hand. “I’ll um…I’ll just stay here a while. I won’t cause any trouble. Misty doesn’t want me around, so…” His eyes fell once more. “Yeah. I’ll just stay here.”


Alec squeezed Misty’s hand and gave her a little smile too. “The world might be a better place without an Alec Banks in the way, but it’s far from being able to survive without you.” He cocked his head. “So don’t ever think it would have been better if we’d lost you, okay?” His voice was still quiet. Still calm. But he didn’t like thinking about what would have happened, had she not made it. It was bad enough having lost the baby – to lose her too…he didn’t want to try imagining it.

“Besides…” A new quirky smile surfaced. “If you were gone, I wouldn’t have a place to live.” He knew her well enough to know that she’d get he was just trying to tease, because it was hard to him to actually say, “I care about you.”

“You’re gonna be okay,” he comforted. “I know it doesn’t feel like it, but…I know you, and I know it might take a while, but you’re gonna come out of this. I promise.” He lifted her hand and gave it a gentle kiss. He knew she was tired and probably would rather just rest than talk. “Some others are here. Wyatt. Reese. Up to you if you want to see anyone else, though.”


A new tension had formed. Something was off kilter. Something was wrong. More wrong than normal. One wasn’t usually able to hear beyond the house walls, but today, though words could not be distinguished, the loudness of arguing could easily be heard. Though evil deeds were done, tempers were usually kept in check with a professional reserve. But today, anger stirred into action. And an execution was inevitable…

…Garret sat on the steps of the ammunition house, cleaning his rifle. He usually did this kind of work inside, but today, the fresh air felt nice. Not that “nice” was a luxury often offered around here, but today it was one he chose. He had just put bullets through the heads of two men who had failed in their tasks. Failure – the ultimate route to death when working for Medridge. Failure to complete a job. Failure to do his bidding. Failure to comply. No kind of failure was ever acceptable or forgiven. Those two guys should have known better than to return here from such a sensitive case anyway. Returning…not returning. That wasn’t normally an option pondered…

Garret realized he’d sat motionless for several minutes before bringing himself back to his work, and he shook his head. He could be shot himself for just thinking the things he was. Yet the thoughts were retuning more and more often, creating an undeniable longing in the pit of his blackened soul.

Clicking the pieces of his rifle back in place, he held it up to his shoulder and gazed down the barrel. Catching a certain woman in his sight though, he lowered the weapon. And right there was another factor that tormented his heart.

Better Off...

Hearing someone else come into the room Misty was happy to see Alec even if her eyes really held very little emotion. She didn't feel like seeing many people right now, or talking, or answering questions but Alec, he was different. The brother she'd always wanted but never really had, The brother that was closer than her own. Alec was special to her, and she was happy he was ok.

   "Maybe in the end, it would of been better off if I had."

It sounded morbid, and extremely depressing but suicide was the last thing she was thinking about even if it came across that way its not what she meant. It was just hard to comprehend and handle her emotions at the moment. She felt so cold, so empty, more empty than she ever had before because now she was. 

Taking Alec's hand in her own Misty just looks at it for a long moment as tears well in her eyes once more like a never ending river. Playing with his fingers for a long moment she sucks in a breath in a failed attempt to try and collect herself. 

   "I'm glad you are ok Alec. I don't know what I would of done if something had happened to you."

Looking up at him Misty gives a small smile that is more of a lame attempt to prove she was ok. But it was all she could really offer right now if that.

   "Yes, I think an I'm sorry is in order to him, but at the same time I have a feeling he understands and is not going to hold it against you."

Jason might be hard to deal with sometimes, and thick headed, and maybe not like Carson all that much at the moment but she believed he still had a good understanding of what was going on and that Carson just took his frustration out on anyone he could. Laying a hand on his shoulder Katie's heart broke just a little more of her friend. Leaning down over him and letting her hand slide around him Katie just held him for a long moment in a big bear hug.

   "Of course this is better. It's because you are not a murderous crook that you feel this pain. This life we have...it doesn't come easy and maybe ours is a little rougher than most others, but thats what makes it worth living. Thats what makes the reward at the end of the tunnel seem so much better."

Letting go Katie smiles just a tiny bit maybe hoping to bring just a little bit of comfort to her friend she felt so bad for. Maybe just a little something for him to hold on to...a little hope as to not give up.

   "Never doubt who you are, never let them win, because thats what they want. You are a man with a big heart, unconditional love, a man who has seen the easy road and walked away from it. You are Carson Banks, and I am proud to call you my friend, no matter what your past might look like."

Better Off Then

Feeling a hand on his leg, Carson needn't look up. He knew instinctively who it was just by hearing the way she moved and how her quiet spirit felt when she was near. Her words made his heart ache so very much, though they did soothe as well. If she could see he indeed cared for and loved Misty, why couldn't Misty see it? Why couldn't anyone else? Why had everyone abandoned him when he needed them most? 

With his face still hidden, he nodded, all the while still trying to keep himself from breaking down and crying. "I'm sorry," he mumbled. Finally, he lifted his face, though wouldn't look at Katie. "I need to apologize to Jason," he admitted quietly. "I just..." He shrugged. He knew she'd understand he hadn't meant to hurt anybody - he'd just been so angry, and Jason was all wrapped up in it somewhere and it was just...easy. 

"Just tell me this is better." His voice was still quiet. Shaky. "Tell me this is better than the life I had before because..." He choked on his words as the tears finally spilled over. He couldn't help it. He just couldn't stop them any longer. "Because right about now, I'd... I think I'd rather be a murderous crook than live through this." He swiped at his eyes angrily and tried to stop the tears. "It wasn't supposed to be like this."


Alec slowly entered Misty's room and walked quietly to her before he sat on the edge of her bed and set a hand on her arm. "Hey." His tone was gentler than most people normally saw. "I just...wanted to see you. I had quite a scare when I thought I'd lost you..."

That's Love...

Jumping a little and giving a gasp as Carson hit Jason Katie was surprised. She hadn't expected that at all even though she new Carson was upset and beside himself. Sometimes it was just a lot easier to show anger and sadness than express it, so though Katie didn't expect it, she really wasn't all that surprised either. Her heart ached even more for Carson as he left. She'd had some hard times with Jason in the past, but nothing like this and she couldn't even start to try and understand how anyone felt. All she did know is her own heart hurt a lot for everyone, and it could only be ten times harder for those involved. And somewhere inside for maybe the first time Katie was happy her and Jason weren't connected.

Laying a hand on Jason's arm and giving a small nod to him Katie looks at his lip quick to see if he was ok. There was some blood but he'd survive. He was right though and a little clean up was in order before he went and saw Misty. The last thing she needed was to see more blood.

   "Let me see if I can get a cloth, and some water to rinse your mouth out with. I'll be back."

Turning Katie makes her way down the hall and turns the corner. Spotting some cloths she grabs them before making her own way to the waiting room to get a bottle of water. Entering and seeing Carson there Katie lets out a small sigh. She new he wanted to be left a lone but he was her friend, and she needed to know he was going to be ok too. 

Sitting down next to him Katie rests her hand on his leg for a moment. All words seemed stupid to say and asking if he was ok was even dumber in Katie's mind. Of course he wasn't ok, and there was no point in pretending so why even ask. 

   "You haven't lost all your friends you know, and I'm happy to see you here. It's nice to know you still care, and are still trying. That's love right there, to not let go when everything and everyone says you should. Even if the other person can't see it."

Letting out a small sigh Katie new she had to get back. She didn't care if the others new she was talking to Carson. He was her friend, and he always would be but she needed to get the cloths and water to Jason.

  "I'll be around for a while, so if you need anything ask.....ok?"

Fire

Misty's stare might as well have driven a stake right through Carson's soul, because that's what it felt like. There was a new coldness there. An anger. A hatred. Blame. And Carson knew that all those things were not aimed at the Agency, but at him. He would have tried to convince himself otherwise, but there was one factor that tipped him off. In that stare, one thing was lacking. There was absolutely no trace of love for him left. He had been living on pure hope that somewhere, deep down, a love for him still lingered, even if it were small. But in this moment right now, non existed. 

He straightened and swallowed hard, finding it difficult to think of any words. He wanted to comfort her. Mourn with her. Care for her. And none of it - absolutely none - was possible. 

Having her pull her hand from his, his eyes fell. He automatically started to reach for her again, but stopped. Though it took all of his willpower not to, he knew that at this point, his touch was not welcome. And apparently, neither was his presence. All he wanted to do was help and be there for her, and all she wanted was for him to leave. It didn't make sense and it didn't feel right. But it was fact. 

Slowly, Carson stood, though his eyes lingered on the woman he was losing. "Okay." His voice was but a whisper. "But it's not charity. I do care. And I do love you, even if you don't believe it." Oh how he just wanted to lean down and kiss her cheek. That's all. But instead, he turned and walked away. There was more than sorrow on his heart though. More than anguish. A burning flame had begun - one of anger. One of rage. Rage against the Agency. Rage against those who refused to understand him. Rage against circumstances beyond his control.

By the time he reached the hall, adrenaline was already surging through his veins. There were more people there now. Jason and Katie had joined the others. And it was Jason on whom Carson's fiery gaze landed first.

Jason wasn't sure all that had happened just now, but he truly was sorry about the circumstance and was hurting for Misty. The look on Carson's face was not easily interpreted, but Jason even felt genuine sorrow for him as well. The first words were the only words he could think of, after a slight nod hello. "I am so sorry." 

There wasn't any hesitation. Or if there was, no one noticed or even heard the curse that slipped out from under Carson's breath. For in the next moment, he had hauled back and with true aim, sent a punch directly into Jason's mouth. Taken so by surprise, Jason didn't even block or move out of the way, taking the full brunt of Carson's swing. Knocked off balance, he stumbled back into the wall, putting a hand to his already-bleeding mouth. 

Before Carson could even move another inch, Alec grabbed his arm and Reese stepped between him and Jason. "What in blazes do you think you're doing?!" 

Carson's glare shifted to Reese as he yanked his arm loose from Alec's grip. "Aw, rack off." 

"Hey!" Reese was not about to let this one go, and gave Carson a hefty whack on the chest to keep him in line. "We let you be here because I thought you were going to keep control of yourself." 

"You...you let me be here?" Carson's eyebrows rose, and he blinked. "Let me?" He pointed to Misty's room. "That is my wife in there!" Tears sprang into his eyes. "I lost a child today too, or does that not count?" His voice started to crack, but he kept himself in check. "I have lost everything. My friends, family, my wife, and now my child. And all anyone can do is keep pushing me away because they think they know better than me." The fire in his eyes glowed hot. "Hang all your condolences and sympathies. None of you want me here anyway." 

Shoving his way past Reese, he ignored all the others, and aimed for the nearby waiting room. He let the door fall shut behind him, and was glad to find the room void of other people. Sinking down in a chair, he leaned forward to rest his elbows on his knees, and buried his head in his hands. His body shook with adrenaline as he fought against his rage, his sorrow, his confusion and his misery. Never before had he faced this kind of trial, and he didn't know what to do. And never had he ever felt so alone. Being a part of the Agency...that had been better than this.

Back out in the hall, Jason wiped his bloody lip with his sleeve, and rolled his tongue around his teeth to make sure they were all still in tact. "Dang... I swear he's got knuckles made out of steel." 

Reese was still frowning. "You alright?"

"Yeah, I've had worse." Jason rolled his eyes. "I don't want to see Misty like this though - it'll just upset her."

Wyatt shook his head. "You two get into something recently or what?" 

"No." Jason knew better. As much as he wanted to lash out at Carson's actions, he just couldn't. "I'm just an easy target after everything that's happened." He glanced at Katie. "Guess I need to work on my timing. Or my evading skills." He wiped his lip again. "Maybe both."

Always Suffer the Most!

Hearing people come into her room Misty couldn't help but jump a little. She had heard, but it really hadn't registered much people were coming in there to see her. So many things floated in her mind, and it was hard to tell if this was all really, real or not. Carson's words bounce off her, and she doesn't even take notice for a moment his hand went into hers as she just looks past him at the others for a long moment.

Registering that Carson was there Misty looks back to him. Her eyes seemed so cold, so dim. Her sadness, her angry it was all his fault. If he hadn't had been dumb and messed up none of this would of happened.
  
   "It's not ok, nothing will ever be ok now and no one is safe. It wont ever be safe with stupid people who only thing of themselves in the world. It wont be safe with The Agency around, and its the good people who always suffer the most. It's the good people who don't deserve to be alone, who always end up that way!"

Misty moves her hand from Carson's as some tears fall from her eyes. If it had only been several months ago she would of welcome him there, she would of thrown her arms around him and cried on her shoulder. But now she didn't want him to be. He just reminded her of what she would never have, her family was destroyed, ripped apart, and the only one she could point fingers at was him.

   "Please leave...I don't want you here, and I dont want your charity. I'd rather have no one here at all, than someone who pretends to care."

Painful Assurance

As Misty’s scream filled the hospital hallway, actions of friends and family were faster than those of the nearby nurses. It wasn’t just another person in that bed – it was someone loved by more than one.

It was Wyatt and Carson both who made it to the doorway first, but one of them had to give. Their eyes locked, but Carson’s stare was strongest. “We’ve been over this once, mate,” he hissed. “Don’t make me repeat myself.” Entering Misty’s room, he left Wyatt behind, along with Reese and Alec, who stayed put. Not because they wanted to, but out of simple respect. And all, including Alec, were ready to intrude, should Carson’s presence not be wanted…

The day before…

Carson had just finished his morning run and was starting to get things going in the restaurant. Though not open until later, there was plenty to do every day before any customers arrived. The day felt…off kilter somehow. Not that any day was really all that great anymore, but today there seemed to be an unexplainable gloom hanging in the air – one that just made Carson’s mood all the more sour.

Hearing the bell on the front door, he sighed. This is why he always kept it locked until Thirteen or Aerith were supposed to come – couldn’t customers read the closed sign?

He emerged from the kitchen, ready to state his open hours, but seeing Alec, he stopped short. This was odd. “Hey…” Confused, he neared, immediately put on guard by the look on his brother’s face. Something was wrong. Terribly wrong. “Alec?” His approach was made more cautious. “What’s wrong?”

Alec swallowed hard. He obviously couldn’t hide the raw emotions in his eyes. “I thought I should come in person instead of call.”

Carson’s pulse quickened. “Alec…what happened?”

“Look, can we sit down?”

Carson took his brother by the shoulders. “What. Happened? Is it Mac? Misty? What?”

Alec chewed on the inside of his lip, perhaps a little sorry he’d volunteered for this. But he knew it was still best. And he also knew Carson would prefer hearing it straight. “Someone broke into the house last night.”

Carson’s hands dropped from Alec as his eyes widened in panic. “Is Misty okay?”

“She will be. But she was hurt.”

“How bad? Where is she?”

“She’s at the hospital. She…” Alec’s words trailed off as Carson was already on his way to grab his keys, and he rolled his eyes. “She was knifed. In the throat. She lost a lot of blood, but JT says she’s gonna pull through.”

Carson was already back and aiming for the door, but as he opened it, he stopped short and turned to look back at Alec again. A new and horrible thought had struck. “The baby…” His words were but a whisper.

Alec’s jaw tightened. The answer just wouldn’t come. All he could do was shake his head. “I’m so sorry.”

Tears sprang into Carson’s eyes, and he had to take a moment just to absorb the shock. He wasn’t sure whether he wanted to scream, pass out, get sick, or all three. He’d thought his heart could not hurt more, but he’d been wrong. Never had there been a pain anything like this – so deep that it went past pain into a numbness of his very soul. A single tear etched a trail down the side of his face. “Who was it?”

A chill ran down Alec’s spine, hearing the icy cold question. “We don’t know. But the Agency would be an awfully good guess.”

Carson took a deep breath to regain control, and he nodded. “You want to ride with me back to the hospital? Or maybe you should drive?”

“I shouldn’t. I’m still kinda dizzy.”

“Wait…are you okay?”

“Yeah. Just got conked on the head. I’ll be alright. Prolly shouldn’t drive though til I stop seeing double.”

“Right.” Carson finally stepped outside. His legs didn’t feel like he was even moving, but somehow…somehow he’d make it…

Carson had been met with opposition upon getting to the hospital. Though he still did some work for the Elite, he avoided the office as of late, due to all the ill feelings against him. Most relationships had not been mended, though he would always be grateful for the few that had forgiven him. Like Katie. But today, he was wanted by very few. Reese had been unhappy but respectful, while Wyatt had threatened to send him packing. Jason had not been thrilled with his presence, but was tolerant. Anyone else kept their distance. Carson ignored most, unwilling to leave. The sight of Misty lying in that bed was almost too much to bear, and more tears were shed than anyone else knew about. If only he could have been there for her. To protect her. And their child. Their child that now, they would never know. The child whom he had grown to love and look forward to, even if he’d never told anyone. The future was now even foggier than it had ever been before…

…Entering Misty’s room once again, Carson was by her bed in just three strides. “Misty?” His hand automatically went to grasp hers gently, his other palm brushing her cheek. “Hey…shh… it’s okay. You’re okay. You’re safe.”


Jason’s head snapped up quickly enough to give away the fact that he’d just been startled by Katie’s appearance. He’d been so lost in thought that he hadn’t even noticed anyone walking by, let alone her stopped at his doorway.

His eyes were tired, reflecting his heart that was pained with the recent events. Though he’d broken up with Misty, he still cared, and he was still saddened things had turned out like they had. He had a different kind of sorrow – it had not been his child she carried, nor had he had the hopes and dreams tied up in a future with the baby. His pain was simply that of watching his friend suffer.

“Hmm?” It took a moment to get his mind on task, and he finally shook his head. “Oh. Yeah, okay. I didn’t expect we’d find much. Thanks.”

Katie’s invitation took him a little by surprise, but ever since their recent chat over coffee, things seemed to have been better between them. Easier. Less stressed.

He let his eyes land on hers and linger there for a moment or two. She knew he was having a hard time with all this, and he appreciated her insightfulness…even if she couldn’t feel his emotions.

Blinking, he cleared his throat while he stood. “Fresh air sounds good, and I was planning on stopping by the hospital to see if anything had changed, so…yeah. That’d be great.” He grabbed his jacket and joined Katie in the hall. There would be no other witness to the wayward route of his hand – old habits died hard… as did the motion of his hand towards Katie’s shoulder. He caught himself before it reached its destination though, and he inwardly cringed before shaking it off. “Lead the way, driver.”

A Moment's Wish...

Somewhere caught between asleep, and waking Misty could hear talking. Words being thrown around her like lost, answer, saving, and baby. None of it made sense to her as she tried to wake herself a little more. Was this all just a dream, and none of this real. The last thing she remembered was hearing someone in the house. Shadows, falling, the smell of blood, and the fear that rushed over her. What had happened...

The next day...

Feeling the warmth of the morning sun on her face Misty rotates her head to the side and smiles watching Carson laying next to her fast a sleep. She liked watching him sleep sometimes. He seemed so at peace, and calm. It was one of the best ways to wake up. 

Looking back up at the ceiling Misty smiles, but soon it fades as a sharp pain coursed through her body shocking herself away. As her eyes open the sun light was gone, and she was in a white room, a hospital room. Her body hurt all over, slowly memories come back to her about what had happened, about the attack. 

Slowly bring her hand up to her neck Misty feels the bandages wrapped around her. How bad was it? Letting her hand fall from her neck it rests on her stomach. In only another split moment a wave of fear rushes over Misty. Her baby! There was no need for anyone to tell her, for she already could tell herself by the empty feeling she felt. The next thing to follow was a blood curdling scream, and than sobs. How could this happen....why could this happen? This was the one good thing she had left and now like everything else it was gone. Her baby was gone, and she didn't even know why, the only thing she new and she felt was sadness, hurts, more hurt than all over her body injuries combined, her hear was shattered, and for a moment Misty wished she hadn't lived either.

Leaning back in her desk chair Katie lets out a long sigh. The last few days had been deadly quiet at work and everyone new why. Nothing seemed the same anymore, hurt, sadness...it was so thick someone could cut it with a knife. Misty was family to everyone at work, all so close and now...one of there family members had been hurt almost beyond repair, and no one new what to do. This wasn't something that could be fixed. Psychical Misty would get better, but mentally Katie didn't think it would be so easy. 

Sitting forward again Katie runs her hands over her face and lets out a long sigh. She'd been working almost all night to try and fit what had happened together and why. But every ally she looks up came to a dead end. This was just another sick game played by The Agency but still it seemed different some how. 

Looking over her shoulder at the light on in Jason's office Katie new thats where he was. She felt bad for him too and couldn't imagine how he was feeling through this all as well. It was hard on everyone but Jason and Misty were so close even if they were just friends again. Getting up she heads that way and knocks gently on the door before poking her head into his office. 

   "Hey J. I just got done looking through those old files Reese had me on and I came up with more dead ends. He just told me to let you know whenever I found anything or not."

Pausing for a second Katie just studied Jason and her heart sank a little even more. It was hard to actually read him, but still she could just tell by looking at him it was hard. 

   "I was thinking of going to see Misty, I didn't know if you wanted to tag along. Figured maybe you could use a little time away from work, and fresh air too."

Suffering

Making sure there were no more threats, nor anyone nearby the house as a witness, the one dark figure slowly weaved in and out of the shadows, waiting for his partners to reappear. But when he heard the muffled sounds of a commotion inside, he waited no longer.

Entering the house, he was quick to see one of his partners groaning at the bottom of the stairs, along with Misty, who was also lying in a heap, bleeding and not moving.

"What happened?! Are you insane?!" The only response he received was word that Joe was dead, upstairs, and this whole thing had apparently been an accident. And an ugly one at that.

Kneeling next to Misty, he felt her pulse, finding it weak. "She fell down the stairs? We were supposed to bring her alive! Idiot!" His backhanded whack to his buddy emphasized his statement. "She's prolly gonna bleed to death, and who knows about the baby now?! There's no way I'm dragging her along - we'll just have to report the incident and hope we don't get shot ourselves for lousing this up."

Not bothering to really even check to make sure the other guy was alright, he hurried up the stairs to sling the dead body over his shoulder - they would not be leaving that kind of evidence. And besides, if they had their dead partner when returning to base, that would be the proof that something had gone terribly wrong. Maybe they could even say that Alec had been in the house. Yeah. That would work.

"Come on." Once back downstairs, he aimed for the door. "Let's get out of here before Alec comes to. With any luck, this chick will be dead by the time he does, and that'll at least be one more agent out of our hair."

Outside, Alec wasn't sure how long he'd been out, when his senses finally returned. His head was throbbing, and things were rather blurry, but he managed to pull himself to his feet. What on earth had happened? Who had attacked him, and why? Then a new thought struck him. "Misty." He squinted to the dark house, just as his ears picked up the sound of squealing wheels. "Oh, no... Misty..."

Stumbling half-blindly to the back door, Alec caught himself on the porch railing, almost falling over from dizziness. "Misty!" Where was she? Had she been attacked too? Making it inside, he fumbled for the light switch. Able to see a little better, it was only after he'd rounded the corner that he spotted Misty on the floor. "Misty? Can you hear me?" He knelt quickly by her side, the sight of all the blood making his stomach churn. He'd grown numb to blood - but not when it belonged to someone he cared about.

Realizing she'd been cut on the throat, he pressed his hand to the wound, trying to slow down the bleeding. "No, no, no...." This couldn't be happening. "Misty, come on... don't do this. Not now. Stay with me." Finding a pulse - though weak - was a small bit of relief, but he knew he needed to act fast.

Daring to leave her just for a moment, he grabbed the cordless phone and was right back at her side with his hand to her wound again. Blood was smeared all over his hands and clothes, and he didn't even know if all the blood on the wall down the stairs was Misty's or someone else's. For all he knew, someone else was still here, but he couldn't risk leaving her to search.

His thumb dialed 911. What happened after that would forever be a foggy memory of an incoming emergency team, an ambulance ride, blacking out, waking at the hospital, seeing Misty wheeled down the hall, and being forced to the ER himself for care...

..."I'm fine, just lay off, will you?" Alec swatted at the nurse's hand and slid off the bed. 

"You need a bandage on that," she scolded. "And sit down before you fall down - again."

Alec swayed unsteadily as the room spun, and he held onto the rail at the foot of the bed to keep from keeling over. Mild concussion. So what? He was fine. He already had a few stitches in his scalp - that was good enough. 

The nurse's arms went around him to force him to sit back down on the bed, and she looked at him sternly. "Your friend is in the O.R. with the best care possible - there is nothing you can do for her, so you might as well take care of yourself right now." 

Alec finally relented, his eyes falling as the nurse returned to cleaning around the stitches on the back of his head, and applying a small bandage. "Have you heard how she is?" 

The nurse sighed. "Not good." She set a gentle hand on his shoulder. "But they're doing all they possibly can..."

..."Alec?" 

Having eventually given in to resting, Alec was lying on the bed now, staring at the ceiling. A visitor though, startled him, and he looked quickly to the door. "Reese. Wondered when you'd get here."

Reese was dressed haphazardly in an old pair of jeans and a wrinkled t-shirt, his hair rather a mess, indicating he'd been in bed. "Yeah, I hurried as fast as I could. What on earth happened?" 

To say this was awkward would be an understatement, but this was too important to dwell on that factor. Alec pulled himself up to sit a little straighter, trying to get his brain to think straight. "I'm really not sure. I just happened to get up at an odd time and got ambushed soon as I stepped out of my shed. When I came to, I went in the house and found Misty at the bottom of the stairs, unconscious and her throat slit. I called 911, and when the team arrived, they swept the house and no one else was there, but they said it looked like someone else had been upstairs, but there's really no telling what actually happened til someone can go through and look for prints and test the blood." He took a deep breath and let it out slowly. "I'm sorry."

"For what?"

"This shouldn't have happened. I should have heard someone there sooner. I should have stayed in the house. Something. Anything. I should have been more careful about protecting her." 

Reese cocked his head. "You really do care, don't you?"

It had been a long time since Alec had seen Reese. Getting kicked out of the apartment the Elite had provided had been the last interaction. And that seemed like a lifetime ago. "Of course I do." Alec let his eyes drop. "She's...family." He shook his head. "This...getting ambushed...I should have listened to my senses. They never should have gotten as far as they did. Misty, she..." His sentence dropped off as he struggled to control his emotions. "She's in bad shape because I let my guard down." 

"No one could have predicted this." Reese moved closer to the bed. His eyes were filled to the brim with worry, but blame was absent. "Were you in on this?"

"What? Of course not!" Alec hadn't even considered being under suspicion himself. "Do you really think I was?!"

"No...I don't." Reese's tone was oddly stern. "My point is, you cannot take the blame for this. There's no way you could have known something like this would happen. If -"

He was cut off by JT's entrance into the room. "Reese? Alec?" 

Reese turned quickly. "I didn't know you were working tonight."

"Well, I wasn't." JT set his hands in his pockets. "But I'm on call for any Elite patients." He looked between the two men grimly. "I just came from working on Misty."

"And?" It wasn't an employer's concern coming through, but rather an uncle's worry. 

"And...she's alive." JT's voice was not very positive. "She lost an awful lot of blood." He looked to Alec. "You probably saved her life by seeing to her wound and calling 911 as fast as you did."

Alec swallowed hard. He didn't feel anything near to a hero at this point. "Is she gonna live?"

"I think so." JT nodded. "I can't be a hundred percent sure, and she's gonna be in ICU for a while, but...if I was a betting man, I'd say she'll pull through. It's just gonna take some time for her body to recover." 

Reese's mind had already jumped one step farther. "And...the baby?" 

JT pursed his lips before he finally shook his head. "The baby didn't survive."

Alec felt like his soul was being suffocated. 

"I think it was the fall," JT continued. "The paramedics said she'd fallen down the stairs. Aside from the loss of blood and the emotional stress, I'd say that the nature of the fall is what caused trauma to the baby. By the time Misty arrived here...there were no life signs and nothing we could do. This adds to Misty's physical condition, but the worst of that is over."

Reese leaned his hands on the foot of the bed, his stare glued to the floor. "Physically. But not emotionally."

JT's nod was solemn. "Agreed." He looked to Alec. "You're free to go any time, but my advice is to take it easy for a couple days, and if you experience any ill effects like bad headaches, dizziness or vomiting, come back in - otherwise, you should be safe to leave." He gestured to the hallway. "You can see Misty for just a brief few minutes if you like, though it'll be a while before she regains consciousness." 

"Thank you." Reese straightened and shifted his gaze to the ceiling. Once JT was gone, the silence was overwhelming. He eventually looked back down to Alec, and was surprised to see the young man's eyes held tears just beneath the surface. "You alright?"

Alec shook his head. "No. But I'm far better than Misty." He sat up and swung his legs over the edge of the bed. He'd been so excited. That little baby was going to be his niece or nephew. And Misty...though unexpected, Alec knew she's been looking forward to being a mother. Preparing for it. Getting excited about it. And now...it had been ripped from her grasp. Everything else had fallen to pieces - this had been the one precious thing still good. And now it was gone. "This is gonna kill her."

Reese was quiet for another few minutes. "Yes. It is. But I have confidence she will pull through. She's tough. And this is one of the hardest things she'll ever face...but she'll survive. I know it."

Alec knew he was right. Misty wasn't the first to go through this. But it didn't make it any easier, and Alec hurt the most for her. "Who's going to tell Carson?" 

Reese pursed his lips. "I will, unless you feel it would be better coming from you."

Alec nodded. "I'll tell him. I'll stop by and see Misty, then I'll head his way." By now it was early morning. "He'll be at the restaurant already." 

It wasn't long before many others from the Elite had been called, including Katie, whom Reese called himself. They had not lost Misty, but this was a hard blow for all of them. It was a big issue that the baby was lost, and it was a big issue that someone had gotten this close and had attacked again - with no clue as to why.