"Even small steps still count. We have to take the victories as they come."
It was quiet around the office today, and Hope really didn't have much work. She really didn't want to be there after all that had happened. It was a lot for one person to take in even if they didn't know Alec all that well. So hearing Scott suggestion made Hope jump a little. She was definitely ready to get out of there.
"At a time like this I think ice cream sounds like the perfect answer. Lets go get some. I'll even let you pay for it."
Hope smiles and gives Scott a little nudge at least hoping to get a little humor to spark in his eyes. Even if it was only a little sliver...it was the small victories after all.
Giving a nod at Eli Ryan looks down at her phone again.
What is so important that you give up lunch with me? Why I never...
Shaking her head and rolling her eyes Ryan replys.
I've got a lot of work to do and I think Eli wanted to do lunch or something. If anything changes I'll text you.
Looking back up at Eli and realizing he said something Ryan nods again. Before putting some toast in the toaster.
"Sounds good Bro. Have a good day."
Ashlee jumps up and gives a small punch to Eric's arm. She was dieing to ride and happy to hear him ask. All together she felt so much better and that little reassurance from Eric really helped.
"I dont know, do you think you can handle riding more? I think you might be more sore than I am."
Her eyes twinkled with a new challenge, and a slight taunting tone. She loved being to joke around with Eric and have him just joke back.
"I'm game if you are though."
7/20/15
Forgive Me
Scott sighed as his mind continued to calm down. He appreciated Hope, even if it had been difficult for him to rebuild any kind of relationship. He hated it that he had scars so deep that they inteferred with the emotions he should be able to enjoy rather than having them torment him.
"I miss you, ya know..." His expression didn't change much as he simply spoke what was true. He'd had coffee with her a couple times. Lunch once or twice. But he still kept her at arm's length.
He let his feet slide back to the floor and leaned back, rubbing his bad eye with the heel of his hand. "Sometimes I wonder what I'd be like if ...if all this hadn't happened." His gaze wandered in her direction before finding it way to the floor. "I feel like I'm stuck. Like no matter how hard I try, each step forward is so small that I'll never reach where I should be...not unless I live to be a hundred and thirty, which isn't very likely."
Another sigh surfaced. "I don't wanna stay here any more today, but I don't wanna go home." He bit his lip. "My stomach usually handles ice cream pretty well," he hinted.
Eli was rather surprised by Ryan's perky attitude this morning. He'd expected less of a smile after last night.
He just watched her walk by, noting her happiness as she checked her phone. Maybe Tal was texting her. Who knew? He followed her to the kitchen, trying to shrug off her odd behavior. "Okay well... I'm off to work then. Call me if you need anything."
Eric hadn't expected Ashlee's affection, but he didn't pull away. Instead, he returned her hug, squeezing her tightly and kissing the top of her head. Was this what it felt like to have a daughter? No matter, it felt good. Having someone look up to him and want him around that much...it was hard to ignore.
Backing away, he smiled and tossed her a wink. "So. Now that that's settled, how about that ride I've been asking you about? I've only got a few days left, so we should make the most of them by getting as saddle sore as we possibly can."
Sitting on the edge of the bed, Garret leaned down to lace up his boots before standing and pulling his shirt over his head. It only took him a few minutes in the bathroom to splash some water on his face and waken his senses. He should have been gone an hour ago.
Stepping back into the plush bedroom, he patted his face dry with a hand towel as his eyes wandered back to the bed. She was still asleep. That would make his next job easier.
As he was donning his leather jacket though, the comforter on the bed moved, and two slender arms and a leg appeared, stretching long to accompany a yawn. “Sneaking away as usual?” Sonya peaked sleepily over the covers and reached up to brush aside her long, dark hair.
Garret didn’t reply. He simply slipped his wallet in his pocket, strapped on his watch, and checked his handgun.
Sonya sat up a little, the thin strap of her nightgown sliding off one shoulder. The atmosphere wasn’t nearly as warm as it had been last night. “Garret?” Her tone indicated a deeper concern than simple curiosity. When met with continued silence, her reflexes took over. But no sooner had she opened the drawer to her nightstand, when a sickening click stopped her. Looking back over her shoulder, she stared at the handgun which was now aimed at her.
Garret moved slowly around the room and, while keeping the gun aimed at Sonya, reached with his free hand into her nightstand to retrieve the small revolver she’d been going for. He tossed it aside before easing down to sit on the deep window sill just feet from the bed. “How long have you known?”
Sonya’s lips curled into a thin smile. “Long enough. I knew you only came here to satisfy your boss’ curiosity - not your thirst for love.”
“Yet you continued to feed me information. Why?”
Sonya shrugged. “I don’t like playing sides, no one knew I was the leak, and…you’re good company. Aren’t those reasons enough?”
Garret tilted his head. “If you knew this would happen, why did you give me what I wanted? Why not string me along?”
“I guess I got tired of playing the game.” Sonya sat up a little straighter. “And…I knew eventually you’d get what you really wanted, but…I didn’t know exactly when that would be.”
“So how long have the bullets in your revolver had my name on them?”
“Oh now that…is for me to know.” Sonya’s eyes locked with his. As cool as she was, there was fear behind her gaze. “But you do have all of the information you require now.”
“I do. You talk too much.”
“Indeed. And you never talk enough. Even so, I know you’re just an assassin with a heart of ice. And I know that killing me will stir nothing inside of you. You’re a cruel man, Garret. I hate myself for leaving the door unlocked for you.” Sonya swallowed hard. “But I did. So put me out of my misery before I regret ever having let you in.”
Garret straightened his arm to line up his gun’s barrel with Sonya’s head, his figure reflected in the elegantly framed mirror that hung above the bed’s headboard. And the moment of silence that followed could have easily been confused with an hour’s time.
A gunshot and the sound of shattering glass pushed a scream from Sonya’s lungs, and she flinched violently enough to shake the bed. The mirror was now in countless pieces scattered everywhere. Shards had cut into Sonya’s arms, leaving tiny trails of blood to stain her nightgown and bedcovers, but her wounds were far from fatal. “What…” She glanced behind her where only traces of the mirror still clung to the edge of the frame, then back to Garret. She knew well enough to know he could never have missed his target by that far.
Garret slowly lowered his gun and returned it to the holster inside his jacket. “Rule number one. Never, ever believe you know your enemy’s next move.” Standing, he headed for the door.
“Garret…”
He paused and looked over his shoulder.
Sonya was still shaking. “I’m…not going to see you again, am I?”
“No. You’re not.”
“Why didn’t you kill me?”
Garret’s eyes returned to the door, his back remaining to her. “Because your eyes reminded me of someone else’s.”
“A woman?”
Yes. Victoria’s mother had worn the same look of dignified fear. It was an image that haunted him still. “A brave soul.” He turned a little to glance at Sonya one last time. “You should probably change your name and leave the country. It won’t be me behind the gun next time.”
“But what about you? Won’t they kill you for not getting rid of me?”
“Perhaps. But every assassin has a new trick up his sleeve.” Leaving the room, he knew his route well through the house and to the grand back courtyard where his vehicle waited. His route after that though? Suddenly, his options had become more clear. Especially after last night’s message. Alec Banks was dead. And that was the opening he’d been waiting for.
Getting into the car, he took a deep breath. "Forgive me, Victoria," he whispered.
"I miss you, ya know..." His expression didn't change much as he simply spoke what was true. He'd had coffee with her a couple times. Lunch once or twice. But he still kept her at arm's length.
He let his feet slide back to the floor and leaned back, rubbing his bad eye with the heel of his hand. "Sometimes I wonder what I'd be like if ...if all this hadn't happened." His gaze wandered in her direction before finding it way to the floor. "I feel like I'm stuck. Like no matter how hard I try, each step forward is so small that I'll never reach where I should be...not unless I live to be a hundred and thirty, which isn't very likely."
Another sigh surfaced. "I don't wanna stay here any more today, but I don't wanna go home." He bit his lip. "My stomach usually handles ice cream pretty well," he hinted.
Eli was rather surprised by Ryan's perky attitude this morning. He'd expected less of a smile after last night.
He just watched her walk by, noting her happiness as she checked her phone. Maybe Tal was texting her. Who knew? He followed her to the kitchen, trying to shrug off her odd behavior. "Okay well... I'm off to work then. Call me if you need anything."
Eric hadn't expected Ashlee's affection, but he didn't pull away. Instead, he returned her hug, squeezing her tightly and kissing the top of her head. Was this what it felt like to have a daughter? No matter, it felt good. Having someone look up to him and want him around that much...it was hard to ignore.
Backing away, he smiled and tossed her a wink. "So. Now that that's settled, how about that ride I've been asking you about? I've only got a few days left, so we should make the most of them by getting as saddle sore as we possibly can."
Sitting on the edge of the bed, Garret leaned down to lace up his boots before standing and pulling his shirt over his head. It only took him a few minutes in the bathroom to splash some water on his face and waken his senses. He should have been gone an hour ago.
Stepping back into the plush bedroom, he patted his face dry with a hand towel as his eyes wandered back to the bed. She was still asleep. That would make his next job easier.
As he was donning his leather jacket though, the comforter on the bed moved, and two slender arms and a leg appeared, stretching long to accompany a yawn. “Sneaking away as usual?” Sonya peaked sleepily over the covers and reached up to brush aside her long, dark hair.
Garret didn’t reply. He simply slipped his wallet in his pocket, strapped on his watch, and checked his handgun.
Sonya sat up a little, the thin strap of her nightgown sliding off one shoulder. The atmosphere wasn’t nearly as warm as it had been last night. “Garret?” Her tone indicated a deeper concern than simple curiosity. When met with continued silence, her reflexes took over. But no sooner had she opened the drawer to her nightstand, when a sickening click stopped her. Looking back over her shoulder, she stared at the handgun which was now aimed at her.
Garret moved slowly around the room and, while keeping the gun aimed at Sonya, reached with his free hand into her nightstand to retrieve the small revolver she’d been going for. He tossed it aside before easing down to sit on the deep window sill just feet from the bed. “How long have you known?”
Sonya’s lips curled into a thin smile. “Long enough. I knew you only came here to satisfy your boss’ curiosity - not your thirst for love.”
“Yet you continued to feed me information. Why?”
Sonya shrugged. “I don’t like playing sides, no one knew I was the leak, and…you’re good company. Aren’t those reasons enough?”
Garret tilted his head. “If you knew this would happen, why did you give me what I wanted? Why not string me along?”
“I guess I got tired of playing the game.” Sonya sat up a little straighter. “And…I knew eventually you’d get what you really wanted, but…I didn’t know exactly when that would be.”
“So how long have the bullets in your revolver had my name on them?”
“Oh now that…is for me to know.” Sonya’s eyes locked with his. As cool as she was, there was fear behind her gaze. “But you do have all of the information you require now.”
“I do. You talk too much.”
“Indeed. And you never talk enough. Even so, I know you’re just an assassin with a heart of ice. And I know that killing me will stir nothing inside of you. You’re a cruel man, Garret. I hate myself for leaving the door unlocked for you.” Sonya swallowed hard. “But I did. So put me out of my misery before I regret ever having let you in.”
Garret straightened his arm to line up his gun’s barrel with Sonya’s head, his figure reflected in the elegantly framed mirror that hung above the bed’s headboard. And the moment of silence that followed could have easily been confused with an hour’s time.
A gunshot and the sound of shattering glass pushed a scream from Sonya’s lungs, and she flinched violently enough to shake the bed. The mirror was now in countless pieces scattered everywhere. Shards had cut into Sonya’s arms, leaving tiny trails of blood to stain her nightgown and bedcovers, but her wounds were far from fatal. “What…” She glanced behind her where only traces of the mirror still clung to the edge of the frame, then back to Garret. She knew well enough to know he could never have missed his target by that far.
Garret slowly lowered his gun and returned it to the holster inside his jacket. “Rule number one. Never, ever believe you know your enemy’s next move.” Standing, he headed for the door.
“Garret…”
He paused and looked over his shoulder.
Sonya was still shaking. “I’m…not going to see you again, am I?”
“No. You’re not.”
“Why didn’t you kill me?”
Garret’s eyes returned to the door, his back remaining to her. “Because your eyes reminded me of someone else’s.”
“A woman?”
Yes. Victoria’s mother had worn the same look of dignified fear. It was an image that haunted him still. “A brave soul.” He turned a little to glance at Sonya one last time. “You should probably change your name and leave the country. It won’t be me behind the gun next time.”
“But what about you? Won’t they kill you for not getting rid of me?”
“Perhaps. But every assassin has a new trick up his sleeve.” Leaving the room, he knew his route well through the house and to the grand back courtyard where his vehicle waited. His route after that though? Suddenly, his options had become more clear. Especially after last night’s message. Alec Banks was dead. And that was the opening he’d been waiting for.
Getting into the car, he took a deep breath. "Forgive me, Victoria," he whispered.
Good Guy
Sitting down next to Eric Ashlee still couldn't help the small wave of embarrassment as she new her cheeks were more than likely going red. Listing to him Ashlee gives a small nod here and there. Everything he said really did make more sense than what she made up in her own head.
"Ok"
It was a small reply but at least Eric new she was listing to him. Looking up at him and into his eyes Ashlee searched for truth in what he said. It was hard to try and trust him, but he'd really never given her any other reason not to. Maybe her had just let her own mind run away with itself.
"I'll be holding you to that."
Finally giving a small smile Ashlee turns so she is facing Eric more and wraps her arms around His neck in a tight hug. She'd hated being mad at him and not talking to him was the worst too. Things were going to be ok, and she was happy about it. Eric had come into her life and she'd gotten attached before she even new it. To know he'd be sticking around made her feel good.
Hearing Eli know at the door Ryan opens the door slightly, and gives a small smile at him. She wouldn't let on that she new Alec wasn't really dead, but she couldn't help but hide how she was happy either.
"I'm good thanks. Just finished getting ready for work. Going to grab some breakfast and leave. Thanks though."
Slipping past him Ryan goes down the hall way doing up her shirt along the way.
Want to do lunch today?
Getting another text from Alec She shakes her head slightly. Something was up with him she could tell. But it was nice he wanted to do lunch. Unfortunately she couldn't today and he would just have to deal with it.
Not today. Sorry!
Continuing down the hall way she goes into the kitchen banging a few things around while she trys to figure what what to do for breakfast.
Though she didn't say anything Misty really did enjoy hearing Kyle's voice. It was always so soothing, comforting, and just nice to listen to. It was a nice break up of the bleek, depressing day. As Kyle leaves Misty rolls over and just watches him. Kyle was a good guy, He always had been.
Giving another small soft smile to Scott Hope gave a small nod. She new he hated when this happened, and she new he wished so many things. Now if only he could believe in himself and see that he really was more.
"It's alright. You're doing good. One step at a time."
Hope leaned back in the chair next to Scott and gave a little stretch. Scott didn't need to be treated like a baby, he was to smart for that but at least he would know she was there for him, and for him. She would always be there no matter what.
"Ok"
It was a small reply but at least Eric new she was listing to him. Looking up at him and into his eyes Ashlee searched for truth in what he said. It was hard to try and trust him, but he'd really never given her any other reason not to. Maybe her had just let her own mind run away with itself.
"I'll be holding you to that."
Finally giving a small smile Ashlee turns so she is facing Eric more and wraps her arms around His neck in a tight hug. She'd hated being mad at him and not talking to him was the worst too. Things were going to be ok, and she was happy about it. Eric had come into her life and she'd gotten attached before she even new it. To know he'd be sticking around made her feel good.
Hearing Eli know at the door Ryan opens the door slightly, and gives a small smile at him. She wouldn't let on that she new Alec wasn't really dead, but she couldn't help but hide how she was happy either.
"I'm good thanks. Just finished getting ready for work. Going to grab some breakfast and leave. Thanks though."
Slipping past him Ryan goes down the hall way doing up her shirt along the way.
Want to do lunch today?
Getting another text from Alec She shakes her head slightly. Something was up with him she could tell. But it was nice he wanted to do lunch. Unfortunately she couldn't today and he would just have to deal with it.
Not today. Sorry!
Continuing down the hall way she goes into the kitchen banging a few things around while she trys to figure what what to do for breakfast.
Though she didn't say anything Misty really did enjoy hearing Kyle's voice. It was always so soothing, comforting, and just nice to listen to. It was a nice break up of the bleek, depressing day. As Kyle leaves Misty rolls over and just watches him. Kyle was a good guy, He always had been.
Giving another small soft smile to Scott Hope gave a small nod. She new he hated when this happened, and she new he wished so many things. Now if only he could believe in himself and see that he really was more.
"It's alright. You're doing good. One step at a time."
Hope leaned back in the chair next to Scott and gave a little stretch. Scott didn't need to be treated like a baby, he was to smart for that but at least he would know she was there for him, and for him. She would always be there no matter what.
That's a Promise
Scott's reflexes caused him to flinch as he was touched, but it was
just as quickly that he relaxed. The touch was a familiar one. A soft
one. A safe one. No matter the past, Hope would always be safe.
Though his eyes remained clenched tightly shut, he managed a nod. He heard her. He understood. Unfortunately, the violent mental images continued to bombard him as he sat and rocked, trying desperately to regain control before it became an even worse episode.
It felt like the next few minutes were an eternity before he drew in a shaky breath as his shoulders started to relax, and eventually he was able to open his eyes again. He rested his head on his knees, but turned his face so he could see Hope. A few tears had escaped, though he ignored them. His fluctuating emotions never ceased to embarrass him, but he'd quit trying to hide them. Hope and Justin had seen him cry more than anyone else.
He searched Hope's eyes. Those gentle, caring eyes. "I'm sorry," he whispered. He hadn't been prepared for such a sudden attack. "I wish I could control it. I wish I was stronger."
As Kyle continued to strum his guitar softly and hum, he knew Misty was awake. He remained quiet though, not pressing her.
Still plucking strings, he eventually quit humming and started talking - about anything, really. He talked about the weather, him and Alice, their house, and his recent concerts. He never asked Misty to join the conversation - he just knew she could hear him and he wanted her to feel included.
"...So we just got back from up north. Nothing big but we managed to squeeze in about ten concerts so it's a good start. Tell you what, though, some nights I'm totally worn out. And you know it takes a lot to wear me out." He chuckled. "Wouldn't trade it for the world though. I've sold a few songs, too, so that's generated some extra income. My uncle and aunt still have a lot to do with keeping the band afloat but eventually it would be nice to be independent."
He talked a little while longer about the band, then church, then family. "...So I think Phil is getting serious about Rayne but the dork won't tell me about it. Jen, on the other hand, is bored out of her mind and thinking about a job at a dance studio. I can't decide if it would be good for her, or torture since she still wants to be more active and misses her gymnastics...though she never says so. But I guess that's her choice."
Kyle strummed a little more and finally set aside his guitar. He'd been there quite a while, and though he'd stay all night for her, he knew he needed to get home. By now, the band would have unloaded the equipment and Alice would be waiting supper on him.
"I suppose I should let you be and quit talking your ear off." He stood and stretched with a yawn. He still wouldn't push Misty into talking, though he was just a bit disappointed she hadn't even said hi.
He reached down an gave her shoulder a gentle pat. "You take care, Miss T. I'm sure I'll see you again soon."
Eli took his time lacing up his boots as he got ready for work. He hadn't slept well all night, his mind going too many different directions. It was hard accepting the fact that Alec was suddenly gone. Most recently, Eli had viewed him as an enemy in more ways than one. But his passing brought to mind when they'd actually been friends...pretty good friends, too. Maybe that's what Eli missed the most. It wasn't so much Alec's death in itself, but it was losing that friend all over again. And maybe...maybe there was guilt for not having made amends. Alec had done some pretty bad things, but he'd changed as of late. Eli had seen it. And everyone deserved another chance. Eli knew he couldn't dwell on the past or regrets, but he couldn't deny that this whole thing was just a bit tough.
He stood straight and grabbed his motorcycle keys, just ready to walk out the door, when he heard Ryan up and about. He was glad of that - hearing her crying last night had gotten to him, and he'd been a bit worried about her.
Deciding work could wait, he ambled down the hallway and tapped on her bedroom door. "Hey, Speedy. I'm heading to work... Need anything before I go?"
As Ashlee turned her back, Eric was worried that this conversation might not have been such a good idea. But her words caught him by surprise. Why would she think he didn't really love it here?
Though his eyes remained clenched tightly shut, he managed a nod. He heard her. He understood. Unfortunately, the violent mental images continued to bombard him as he sat and rocked, trying desperately to regain control before it became an even worse episode.
It felt like the next few minutes were an eternity before he drew in a shaky breath as his shoulders started to relax, and eventually he was able to open his eyes again. He rested his head on his knees, but turned his face so he could see Hope. A few tears had escaped, though he ignored them. His fluctuating emotions never ceased to embarrass him, but he'd quit trying to hide them. Hope and Justin had seen him cry more than anyone else.
He searched Hope's eyes. Those gentle, caring eyes. "I'm sorry," he whispered. He hadn't been prepared for such a sudden attack. "I wish I could control it. I wish I was stronger."
As Kyle continued to strum his guitar softly and hum, he knew Misty was awake. He remained quiet though, not pressing her.
Still plucking strings, he eventually quit humming and started talking - about anything, really. He talked about the weather, him and Alice, their house, and his recent concerts. He never asked Misty to join the conversation - he just knew she could hear him and he wanted her to feel included.
"...So we just got back from up north. Nothing big but we managed to squeeze in about ten concerts so it's a good start. Tell you what, though, some nights I'm totally worn out. And you know it takes a lot to wear me out." He chuckled. "Wouldn't trade it for the world though. I've sold a few songs, too, so that's generated some extra income. My uncle and aunt still have a lot to do with keeping the band afloat but eventually it would be nice to be independent."
He talked a little while longer about the band, then church, then family. "...So I think Phil is getting serious about Rayne but the dork won't tell me about it. Jen, on the other hand, is bored out of her mind and thinking about a job at a dance studio. I can't decide if it would be good for her, or torture since she still wants to be more active and misses her gymnastics...though she never says so. But I guess that's her choice."
Kyle strummed a little more and finally set aside his guitar. He'd been there quite a while, and though he'd stay all night for her, he knew he needed to get home. By now, the band would have unloaded the equipment and Alice would be waiting supper on him.
"I suppose I should let you be and quit talking your ear off." He stood and stretched with a yawn. He still wouldn't push Misty into talking, though he was just a bit disappointed she hadn't even said hi.
He reached down an gave her shoulder a gentle pat. "You take care, Miss T. I'm sure I'll see you again soon."
Eli took his time lacing up his boots as he got ready for work. He hadn't slept well all night, his mind going too many different directions. It was hard accepting the fact that Alec was suddenly gone. Most recently, Eli had viewed him as an enemy in more ways than one. But his passing brought to mind when they'd actually been friends...pretty good friends, too. Maybe that's what Eli missed the most. It wasn't so much Alec's death in itself, but it was losing that friend all over again. And maybe...maybe there was guilt for not having made amends. Alec had done some pretty bad things, but he'd changed as of late. Eli had seen it. And everyone deserved another chance. Eli knew he couldn't dwell on the past or regrets, but he couldn't deny that this whole thing was just a bit tough.
He stood straight and grabbed his motorcycle keys, just ready to walk out the door, when he heard Ryan up and about. He was glad of that - hearing her crying last night had gotten to him, and he'd been a bit worried about her.
Deciding work could wait, he ambled down the hallway and tapped on her bedroom door. "Hey, Speedy. I'm heading to work... Need anything before I go?"
As Ashlee turned her back, Eric was worried that this conversation might not have been such a good idea. But her words caught him by surprise. Why would she think he didn't really love it here?
What she said next, though, made everything clear. Suddenly, it all made sense. Her desire to have him around. Her getting upset when he was gone. And never had he felt so blind. How could he have so completely missed what was now so obvious?
Tossing the towel aside, he moved around the horse and came up behind Ashlee to gently lay a calloused hand on her shoulder. "Come here," he coaxed, and guided her to a couple hay bales by the barn where he sat down with her. The first thing he did was take his bandana and wipe the tears from her cheek.
"I think I better clear up some misunderstandings," he started. It wasn't easy trying to speak from his heart. "First, I drive truck to help support this place financially. I try to earn money driving so the ranch will survive...and so you and your mom will still be here when I get back. So I guess maybe I have been on the road more lately, but it's because I care. It ain't got nothing to do with avoiding anybody."
He paused, looking Ashlee in the eye. It was a tough topic, but he was man enough, and she was grown up enough to talk it out. "I know you've had it rough without your dad, and I'm sorry you've had to go through that." His voice became stern, though still remained gentle. "But I'm not him. I care a great deal for you and your mom both, and I ain't the type of man who takes things like that lightly. I know it might be hard for you to trust me, but believe me when I say no matter where I go, I will always come back. And that's a promise."