Better Off Then

Feeling a hand on his leg, Carson needn't look up. He knew instinctively who it was just by hearing the way she moved and how her quiet spirit felt when she was near. Her words made his heart ache so very much, though they did soothe as well. If she could see he indeed cared for and loved Misty, why couldn't Misty see it? Why couldn't anyone else? Why had everyone abandoned him when he needed them most? 

With his face still hidden, he nodded, all the while still trying to keep himself from breaking down and crying. "I'm sorry," he mumbled. Finally, he lifted his face, though wouldn't look at Katie. "I need to apologize to Jason," he admitted quietly. "I just..." He shrugged. He knew she'd understand he hadn't meant to hurt anybody - he'd just been so angry, and Jason was all wrapped up in it somewhere and it was just...easy. 

"Just tell me this is better." His voice was still quiet. Shaky. "Tell me this is better than the life I had before because..." He choked on his words as the tears finally spilled over. He couldn't help it. He just couldn't stop them any longer. "Because right about now, I'd... I think I'd rather be a murderous crook than live through this." He swiped at his eyes angrily and tried to stop the tears. "It wasn't supposed to be like this."


Alec slowly entered Misty's room and walked quietly to her before he sat on the edge of her bed and set a hand on her arm. "Hey." His tone was gentler than most people normally saw. "I just...wanted to see you. I had quite a scare when I thought I'd lost you..."