6/16/12

Uh...

Catching sight of Beth, Justin can't help it when his heart skips a beat. She was... wearing a dress. A very pretty dress. She looked... fantastic. He doesn't even realize that his eyes had widened. He'd always thought she was attractive but... wow.

Without even time to greet her, Justin is suddenly pulled down a little and towards her, closing the gap. He stares into her eyes and blinks, unsure of her behavior. What was she doing? Why was she so close? What was -

His thoughts are brought to a screeching halt as without warning, her lips are touching his. Pressing. Enveloping them in a warm kiss. 

Still stunned, his first instinct is to pull away, but his muscles move on a different path than his brain. Without thinking, his hands automatically slide around Beth's waist. His eyes fall shut as he cocks his head and bends a little more to make it easier to continue the kiss. 

His brain reeled with questions. Why was she doing this? Why was she kissing him? Wasn't she dating Zach? And why was he returning her kiss if he was questioning her motives anyway? He didn't have an answer. But he didn't care. And he shuts out the questions. 

With arms tightening around Beth, he pulls her closer to himself. Turning his head the opposite way, he doesn't let his lips leave hers. There was something about this whole thing that felt so very strange - embracing his friend like this. And yet there was something about it that also felt like it was the most right thing in the world.

Feeling Beth's permission and willingness, he deepens his kiss, letting it prove how much he'd regretted not doing this sooner and admitting that he had feelings for her. Whether this was hello or goodbye, he wasn't going to let this opportunity slip by. He'd prove he did care for her. And he lets his passionate kiss do the talking.


Was Katie right? Would Crystal love him just the same today if she were still alive? Jeff had to wonder.

Finally looking back at his daughter, he gives her a new small smile. Dwelling on the "what ifs" wouldn't do either of them any good. Cyrstal was gone, and the past was the past. 

"She talked about your future all the time ya know... while she was pregnant. She dreamed of you as a little girl then growing up, having boyfriends, moving from home, having you own family..." Jeff chuckles. "She liked to plan ahead. Me, I flew by the seat of my pants and she always chided me for that. I always liked to say I was just letting her be in charge by letting her do the planning." 

He shakes his head and sighs deeply. "We hadn't been married only a couple months when she found out she was pregnant. Neither of us minded though. It was kinda like we had just stepped into the middle of a fairytale and wherever the pages took us, that's where we'd go. We both knew God was in control and that's all we needed. I never..." He stops and swallows hard. "I never thought about something happening to her or what I'd do. When you were born and she died I just... panicked." He'd had Crystal for such a very short time. They'd only dated a few months, married, and then she was gone. It had all happened so quickly and yet had changed his life forever. 

Turning to Katie, a tear slips out to run down his cheek but he doesn't stop it. "I know you don't hate me for giving you to Jay... but I often wonder if that's what your mother would have wanted. Sometimes I feel like I let her down, not raising you like she'd planned." 

 

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