Spouting Off

Gunner hadn't moved from his seat in Hope's office, although his anger had subsided just a little by the time she came. He was still angry, but feeling less like he wanted to hit somebody.

Unwilling to look at her, his dark eyes stared at the floor, and he remained slouched in the chair. "Oh, people wanna help me alright," he retorted. "They all wanna help fix me. Change me. Just because they don't understand. It's the fact that nobody wants to help me find the truth - the only kind of help I want, and I get punished for it."

He scuffed his boot on the floor, making little ridges in the carpet.  If anyone were to observe, they might see a little boy acting as though he'd just been grounded for misbehaving.

"Reese didn't have his childhood ripped out from under him," he continued angrily. "He doesn't have nightmares, seeing his parents die night after night after night. He isn't tormented enough to want to go put a bullet in his brain every morning. Yet he thinks he knows what's best for me! He thinks taking away my privileges, like I'm his teenage boy, is what will work. Just 'cause I went a little too far last time, he thinks he's got it made by taking away my badge. That doesn't do anything but take away his responsibility. If I'm not on duty, then I can't go do anything stupid in the name of the Elite and have him be liable for it. All he's doing is taking care of his own rear end!"

Yet even as he finally looked up at Hope to give her a fiery glare, somewhere, deep down - way deep down - there was relief. Relief that he didn't have to worry about his job right now. Relief that he could now take time to focus on himself rather than the Elite. Relief that someone was forcing him to take care of his issues.

"I know I got problems," he grumbled. "I know I'm just a little off kilter. I always have been, ever since I got a metal plate fused to my skull. And so? I get a bit obsessed. I can't help it. I try to forget about it, and it comes back again and again. So sue me for being too tired to fight it anymore! Ridicule me for giving in and digging for the truth again."

His eyes blazed as he stared at Hope. "It's not my fault all of this came back again. It's not my fault that almost every night I wake up and think I'm in the hospital again after the accident. Reese thinks he knows my problems? If he had the same nightmares with the same degree of violence every night, he'd want to go walk off a bridge too."

Tears burned just under the surface, proving that more than just anger existed in Gunner right now. "I've been living on caffeine and adrenaline because I can't get a decent night's sleep." His voice cracked as he tried to hold himself together. "Yet I'm punished for not focusing on my job. I'm hounded for answers when I don't even have any. My fiance keeps asking me what's wrong and I don't even know how to respond. Nothing is wrong, other than the fact that I'm losing my sanity, and all anybody cares about is whether or not I'm getting to work on time!"

By now, he'd straightened in his seat and his leg was bouncing again. His body was tight and ready to bolt for the door. "I chased ghosts for years, I blamed myself, tried to kill myself, then I finally thought I'd let it go. Now it's back just as strongly as it was before. The nightmares, the obsession... all of it. All I want to do is solve that stupid case...or just forget the whole thing and finally see my parents again." It was the final statement that finally brought Gunner's eyes back to the floor as he paused. "I just wanna go home and sleep," he ended. "I'm too tired to deal with all this garbage."

Carson forced a little half smile at Thirteen. "Naw...I guess I'm not really okay. Not much anybody can do about it though."

His last visit with Mackenzie had been tough. Not because of her, or even Alec, but because there had been many comments about Misty and Jason. It wasn't Mackenzie's fault - she was just excited about having been with them and liked telling Carson about what she'd been doing. Carson enjoyed seeing his daughter happy, but there was a part of him that didn't want to hear any more. He missed Misty desperately, and hearing about her and Jason didn't help. He'd been so determined, and now...he wondered if it really was a losing battle. He wondered if he really should finally surrender to the inevitable fact that he'd never get his wife back again.

Still looking up at Thirteen, he tried to shrug it off. "Let's just say I'm glad you and Aerith have stuck around - not many people have, and...I appreciate it." He did, too. Phil had come around a few times, but he still hadn't seen Axel at all, and nobody from the Elite would give him the time of day, not to mention Reese hadn't used him at all on any cases lately. He didn't blame anybody, but it felt as though his life was getting more and more cramped every day. All he had was the restaurant. That was it. And sometimes...every once in a while...he wondered where he'd be if he'd never been touched by Jamie or caught by the Elite in the first place.

Standing up, he gave Thirteen's shoulder a pat. "Don't forget to take the leftovers in the fridge when you leave this afternoon." 

Starting the meal with Grace, Jared smiled. "You're welcome." To him, the effort was totally worth it. Grace was worth it. If not for her, well...he wasn't sure what kind of shape he'd be in right now. She deserved a whole lot more than he could give, that was for sure. 

Having dinner with her was nice. And even though it was really a date, the atmosphere wasn't awkward in the least, which made it even more enjoyable. It was only as they were finishing up dessert that Jared sat back and just watched Grace for a few minutes. He didn't rightly know what to do now. Innocent dates weren't exactly something he was experienced with. To have had dinner without plans to keep a girl all night was not his normal pattern.

"I don't know if there's anything good on tv tonight," he mentioned with a shrug. There wasn't much else to do - or much else he could do. "Then again, I don't know when you've gotta go home either." 

So why

Taking some potholders along with the big wooden bored Thirteen goes to the oven and pulls the pizza that had been cooking out. Setting it down into the pizza box and than cutting the pizza Thirteen turns around. Seeing Carson sitting down she cocks her head a little bit to the side before walking over to the table. Carson looked...tired today.
  
   "Are you ok Carson?"

Following Jared with her own plate of food to the table a smile spreads on her lips seeing the candles. Jared went though so much to make this possible tonight she didn't mind one bit that the food came from somewhere else.

   "That is completely ok with me. Its the thought that counts and I can tell much thought went into this weather you cooked it yourself or not."

Getting settled with Jared the smile never left Grace's face. Saying a little prayer and than taking a bite of food Grace couldn't help the small murmur of pleasure that escaped her lips. This was one of the best things she has tasted in a long while. It was amazing, and oh so good.

   "Wow Jared you really outdid yourself. Thank you."

Sitting still while Reese calls in Gunner things dident really go how Hope thought it was going too. She was suprised by Reese but pleased too. Gunner needed this weither he thought he did or not. She could see the pain on Gunner's face and in his eyes but is was that slight hidden releaf that new Reese did the right thing as well. Others might not catch on to it because Gunner hid it well but she could see it.

   "I think that is a good thing Reese. You made the right choose."

Leaving Reese office Hope takes a little bit of time before going back to her own. She new Gunner was upset and he would be for a while but she wanted him to cool down at least a little bit. So doing a few things on the main floor would leave room for that.

A little time passed and Hope finally when back to her office. Opening the door and going to her desk she pulls a manilla envelop from her draw with Gunner's name on it. It was his old file and she would just add to it. Sitting and studing Gunner for a long second Hope cocked her head to one side.

   "So Gunner, I'd like to start out seeing your twice a week and we can go from there. Why do you think no one wants to help you? I am willing to try."

Sulking

Gunner still refused to look up at Hope, even when she said she'd be talking to Reese. It was fine. She could talk to Reese. He didn't care. Nothing would change. Gunner hadn't done anything against the rulebook this time, which meant Reese couldn't have any complaints. 

It was only after several quiet moments that Gunner realized Hope had walked away. Maybe what she'd said was just an idle threat anyway. She, nor anybody else, could control him. 

Gathering up the papers on his desk, he shoved them into his filing drawer before attempting to focus on Elite work. Maybe over lunch he'd go home and take a nap. Until then, he'd accomplish enough to keep Reese happy...

Reese, however, was not happy when hearing what Hope had to say. Sighing deeply, he shook his head. "I was afraid of that." He leaned back in his chair before gesturing to his computer. "Just this morning, I had Dalton find out what Gunner's been doing on his computer lately, and...most wasn't connected to any current cases. Now I know why." 

Falling silent, he studied Hope's face for several moments, trying to read her. He knew she was right. He knew something needed to be done. Work aside, he cared about Gunner's well being, and knew that continuing down this path would only lead to worse things, whether it was crossing moral lines again, or heading for dangerous depression. Neither was good. 

He held up a finger for Hope to wait, then picked up his phone. "Gunner? Would you come to my office please? Thank you." After hanging up, he still said nothing, but waited, confident that Hope would also wait and back him up on his decision. 

It only took a minute for Gunner to show up. Stepping into the office, he glanced from Reese to Hope, then back again. He didn't like this. Not one bit. "Yeah, what's up? You wanna talk about that surveillance I'm supposed to do tomorrow with Pete?" 

"No." Reese straightened, his face remaining serious and his tone calm but firm. "Gunner, starting now, you are on an indefinite leave of absence."

Gunner blinked. "What? But-"

"And in light of the past, I'm going to ask you to temporarily turn in your badge." 

Gunner glanced at Hope again, pain flashing in his eyes. "You can't-"

"I can." Reese was unwilling to back down. If Hope came to him, then this was already serious and had to be treated as such. He held out his hand. 

Gunner scoffed as his eyes went to the floor. "This is the stupidest-"

"Now, please." Reese's voice had grown more stern. 

Gunner didn't move for a moment or two, but finally took his badge off his belt and tossed it onto Reese's desk. "Happy?"

"Nope. I need one more thing." 

It was all Gunner could do to not blow up. This was all so stupid. It was ridiculous, the way he was being treated. It was like he was some little kid that Reese and Hope just wanted to order around. It wasn't fair, and it would accomplish nothing. With gritted teeth, he took his sidearm from its holster and slapped it into Reese's open palm. "There. Now am I supposed to go home and sit on my sorry rear end for three weeks or what? Take away my freedom like some caged animal and-"

"You're on a mandatory schedule of sessions with Hope, starting today, with a frequency of her choice, and you will not return to work until she recommends it."  

"Are you out of your mind?!" 

"Do you want to keep your job?"

Reese's question brought a sudden silence to the air. By now, Gunner's uncaring expression had turned to one of anger. "So you're telling me that I gotta talk to some stupid shrink, or else I'm fired? Because of what? Because I care about my past? Because I have a thing about finding the truth? Seriously?" 

Reese remained calm. "Hope is far from a stupid shrink, and no, this has nothing to do about how much you care about the truth. It's about you taking things too far. Again. It's about you getting help."

"I don't need help!" Gunner's yelled statement hung in the silent air. He looked between Reese and Hope, desperate, yet unable to win this fight. Not unless he wanted to quit his job, and it was still too important to him at this point. Throwing up his arms, he spun around and stalked for the door, letting it slam shut behind him. 

Reese cringed before he looked over at Hope. "Well...he didn't quit. That's a good thing, right?" 

Gunner stomped across the floor, almost running into Susanne, but he didn't care. He ignored all the strange looks thrown his wait, and headed straight for Hope's office. Letting himself in, he flopped down in a chair to sulk until she showed up again.

Jared was already grinning, but it widened into a smile with Grace's kiss to his cheek. "Like I'm gonna complain about you sticking close," he teased. "Here, you can take these glasses of water." Having trouble enough the way it was, he let Grace help him before returning the pitcher to the refrigerator.

"I...do have a confession to make," he admitted as he wheeled to the stove and opened it to reveal the two plates of food covered in foil to keep warm. "Well...two, actually."

He reached in and gave Grace one plate, then took the other for himself. "My first confession is that Ma's at Bible study tonight, so...we get to dine alone. And, my second confession..." He set his plate on his lap so he could wheel towards the dining room. The table was set very nicely, and his candles burned bright with the overhead lighting dimmed just a little for a warm atmosphere.

He stopped at the table and glanced up at Grace with a sheepish expression. "I could just let you think I'm Superman, but I have a feeling you're too smart to believe that anyway." He gestured to the food. "You can thank me for the salad - I cut up the lettuce and tossed it all by myself. Oh, and I poured the water - you saw that. But as far as what smells so good for the main course...it should taste great because I had it brought in from a restaurant downtown."

He shrugged and quirked a silly little grin. "You said earlier you thought I was probably a good cook. Well...I did learn a thing or two from my mom, but with me in this confounded chair, I'd been doing good if I coulda whipped up some mac and cheese. And I wanted something a bit more special than that for you tonight. So I hope you like beef that'll melt in your mouth."  

 "Huh?" Carson had been lost in his own little world not having even noticed Thirteen's presence in the kitchen. "Oh, um... yeah, you can grab that pizza coming out." He gestured to the oven. "Thanks." 

Wiping his hands on a towel, he sunk down in a chair to rest. It had been a busy noon hour, and he was exhausted. Not that it was due to a busy lunch hour. He felt exhausted most days lately without any apparent reason...other than stress. 

Sinking down on the edge of his bed, Trent held his cell phone in his hands. A lump had risen in his throat, and he hadn't gone right back out to the barn as planned. He'd just come to grab his other pair of gloves and had happened to check his phone. But hearing Jasmine's message had caused him to forget what he'd been doing. 

She was so sweet, and it sounded like she was really growing and getting a handle on life. And Trent was missing it. All of it. 

He looked down at his phone and fiddled with the buttons. Dylan's words came back to him, as did the gnawing in his gut...the gnawing that had started long ago. He was so different from everyone else here. They were all close to their families...loving...caring...keeping in touch at the very least. And he and Jasmine, well...it was no fault of hers - she tried everything she could to have a relationship with him. He was the one that...

Trent sighed. Pocketing his phone, he stood and wandered to his desk to open up his laptop. And getting on the internet, he checked a list of flight schedules. 

To Bad

Putting her hands on her hips and shaking her head Hope was sad Gunner was being so stubborn and he was really leaving her with no choose. She wasn't going to keep letting this go on and get worse. If something did happen and she didn't say anything than it would be on her. She'd almost lost the ability to practice once she wasn't going to let that happen again. She enjoyed helping people to much for that.

   "Than I guess I will be telling Reese. Compromises don't work when they are only one sided, and I meant what I said. I'm not messing around anymore and letting you continue to do this to yourself."

Letting out another small sigh Hope really was sorry that Gunner wouldn't talk to her, to anyone for that matter. Even if it was to help him with what he was doing. At least it would be someone else there to keep him level headed. She had to do this though.

Turning Hope made her way from Gunner's desk and headed for her own office. She had a few things she needed to do this morning before it got to be to late. She would talk to Reese in a little bit. She could only hope he would be in a better mood today than the last time they spoke. This was important and it couldn't wait any longer.

...About an hour has passed as Hope finally made her way across the main floor and to Reese office. She'd given Gunner a little extra time to deiced to come and talk to her but he hadn't take it. Now this couldn't wait, she wouldn't let it wait any longer.

Getting to Reese office and knocking on the door she enters giving a small smile and coming over to his desk. There was no easy way to tell him this she just had too.

   "Hey Reese...we need to talk about Gunner. He's back on the obsession of his past and wont talk to anyone about it. I think in someways he is worse than before, but in some ways he is not. I just think something needs to be done before it gets to be to bad again."

Hearing Jared yell through the door Grace opens it and steps in. The smell of whatever was cooking hit her nose and she couldn't help but smile. If Jared was doing this all alone for her that was special. Not to mention since he only had one arm at the moment to try and cook with it almost seemed impossible but he was trying anyways and that is what counted.

   "Something sure smells good."

Coming into the kitchen Grace sets her bag down on the chair before coming a little closer to Jared. She looked a little different now than she had this morning. Now outside of work she was a little more dressed up since this would be there first real date. Her hair was tired back slightly, and cheek a little red. a blue sundress and some sandals was her choose of ware.

   "Wow, you really didn't have to go through this much trouble Jared, or you could of at least let me help you my goodness."

Drawing a little closer Grace lens in and gives Jared a small kiss on the cheek before pulling away but not to far. Jared smelled good tonight and she was just taking a moment to take it in. After all most of the time when they met they were sweaty from work.

   "Mmmm...can I just stand here while you cook? You look good, and smell even better than the food."

   "Hey Dad, just...wanted to call and say hi. Hadn't talked to you in a while and though I would. Ryder has been busy with his zoo work. I worry about him sometimes with those animles. I spend most my free time there looking at them all. Some times it makes me sad though so see them all caged up and not free. Ryder says its for there own good though."

Thirteen paces the backroom of Mom and Pop's while on her fifteen minute break. She really didn't have anything else to do and she hadn't talked to her dad in a while. She never told anyone but she  missed him.

   "Carson has been letting me cook more. I like cooking, its fun and learning how it helping me be able to cook at home a little more too. I wish you'd come and visit more. Anyways I better get going. I...I love you. Bye."

Hanging up the phone and putting it back into her pocket before walking back into the kitchen where Carson was. Washing her hands she gives him a small smile before going over to where he was and watching his for a long second.

   "Hey, did you need anymore help here?" 

Impossible Feat

Gunner's jaw tightened and he swiveled in his chair to face his desk again. He stared at the papers as one leg bounced nervously. "I dunno why you keep wanting me to talk to somebody," he grumbled. "It doesn't do anything anyway 'cept rehash a bunch of garbage."

He picked up a pen to fiddle with, and began clicking it open and shut, open and shut. "Talking things out is pointless and accomplishes nothing. Sitting here and actually going after the case - now that does something."

He could feel Hope's eyes on him, though he refused to turn back around. He knew she wouldn't like what he was saying. He knew good and well that talking things through helped clear people's heads and helped people deal with situations better - whether it was logical or not. But if he talked things through, he might not want to go after evidence anymore. And if he didn't want to go after evidence anymore, that would mean he was giving up the case. And he couldn't give up. Ever.

His bouncing leg and clicking pen still had not stopped. He felt like a caged animal, backed into a corner, and panic was starting deep down on the inside. His palms started to sweat, and he swallowed hard.

"I'm fine," he stated flatly. "I just...dozed off 'cause I was here early. Now I got work to do before Reese comes and breathes down my neck."

"Yeah, but if I break something else, you'll have to keep taking care of me." Jared knew by now that even if he was well, Grace would make time for him. Still though, there was just a small part of him that worried maybe she wouldn't.

Back inside the house, it was discovered that Lydia was busy in the basement doing laundry. It was assumed that tonight would still be fine though, and Jared seemed as though he didn't mind not asking his mother about it. What he did not tell Grace, was that he knew good and well Lydia had Bible study tonight, which meant she'd be gone...

...Fillet of beef with red wine sauce, green beans and savory garlic and butter mashed potatoes - two plates were being kept warm in the oven, the wonderful aroma filling the kitchen. Fresh lettuce salad was already on the dining room table, and two slices of gourmet cheesecake remained chilled in the refrigerator for later. Jared would have a lot of explaining to do, since all of this was a rather impossible feat.

Using his shoulder as much as he dared with his wheelchair, he continued to maneuver between the kitchen and dining room, finishing up preparations. It was seven-thirty and he knew Grace would be here any minute.

Dressed in a clean pair of jeans and a plain black t-shirt, it wouldn't seem much to some, but it was more than his usual sweats he usually wore around the house. At least he'd gotten a hair cut today too, which helped, and he'd managed a good shower and shave as well. That alone had been exhausting, but...it was worth it. 

Balancing two glasses between his legs, he was just pouring some water over ice when he heard the doorbell. Still keeping the refrigerator door propped open with one foot and handling the cumbersome pitcher, he yelled, knowing it must be Grace. 

"It's open!" He glanced to the dining room, making sure he'd remembered to light the candles in the center of the table, and finished pouring the water. "I'm in the kitchen," he hollered. 

"So...?" Jade elbowed Rosalyn as they washed the breakfast dishes the next morning.

Rosalyn quirked an eyebrow at her. "So...what?"

"So how did last night go?"

"Oh, that." A little smile crept across Rosalyn's lips. "It went well. I need to give you your shoes back, by the way."

"Shoes can wait. Juicy details can't."

Rosalyn rolled her eyes. "There aren't any juicy details."

Jade's jaw dropped, along with the cup she was washing, which splashed back into the soapy water. "None?"

"Not really." Rosalyn shook her head. "We went out to eat...danced...went for a walk. It was...really nice."

"Oooh...a romantic walk under the stars?"

Rosalyn grabbed another plate to dry and thought for a moment before shaking her head again. "It would have been more romantic, had we not talked about the stupid stuff going on back here." She gave Jade a sidelong glance. "Making out just didn't seem like the best idea when I was crying and Chad was trying to be sweet."

"Aw I'm sorry." Jade wished there was something she could do. She hated what was going on with Jim, but she also knew that to interfere could cause even more problems.

"It's okay." Rosalyn shrugged and continued to work. It was a few more moments before a new grin emerged and she spoke again. "We did have a nice goodbye kiss though."

Jade giggled. "Well that's good. You wouldn't want to leave the poor man with nothing."

Rosalyn's cheeks had turned red. "I wouldn't have wanted to have been left with nothing either," she admitted with a laugh. She didn't know when she would see Chad again. He was going home and back to work. She was staying here, and their lives would continue on...separately. And she had no idea when he might come back, or even if he would after all the trouble with this visit. All she could do was hope that he was right - that maybe by the time he came again, Jim would have softened.

The back end of the barn was quiet today. But it wasn't so unusual when considering it was Trent and Dylan working that area. Neither were known for being chatterboxes. At the moment, both were seated on some hay bales, taking a break after having cleaned several stalls right after breakfast, and both were sipping on bottles of Mountain Dew.

"Seen Jim today?"

"Nuh-uh." Dylan shook his head. "Heard Becky say he didn't even feel like getting out of bed this morning."

Trent scoffed. "If I'da gotten pummeled by your dad, I wouldn't feel like getting out of bed either."

"He feels horrible, ya know."

"Who? Your dad? Did he say that?"

"No." Dylan took another swig of pop. "But I can tell."

"And how's that?"

"He didn't talk to Remington this morning when he fed him."

Trent cocked his head, grinning a little. "You see a lot, don't you?"

Dylan shrugged and leaned back into some hay bales. "I dunno. I suppose."

Trent continued to study the young man, curious. Dylan was always so withdrawn...but did that mean he wasn't paying attention, or did he see more than most? "What do you...think about that whole thing with Jim and Rosalyn?"

"I don't think it's something I'm supposed to think about, do you?"

"I'm not asking you to stick your nose in - I'm just asking what your opinion is."

Dylan found his Mountain Dew bottle's label to pick at. "Jim's being an overprotective father, Rosalyn is hurt and may never heal completely, and I dunno about Chad, but I'd bet he's stubborn enough to keep at it."

Trent's mouth twitched. The boy did pay attention. "Mm-hmm...I haven't heard much from Becky on the subject."

"She's stuck in the middle," Dylan reasoned. "She wants to help her daughter, but doesn't necessarily agree Chad's right for her either, and she doesn't like the way Jim's handling things, but he's her husband, so she doesn't argue - at least not in public."

Trent wondered if Mick realized how insightful his son was. "And Clint?"

"He's angry." Dylan took another sip of his pop. "But he's got a lot more than that to stress him out."

"Oh?"

"Well, he's got reason to be angry with his dad - he already got struck once, and will probably never forget it. He wants to help Rosalyn more but doesn't know how, or doesn't dare, and that frustrates him. He's thrilled about the baby coming, but is also scared he can't support his family, and the worry keeps him up at night. He's as happy as anybody that Wes is alive and home, but he's upset Wes isn't planning on working in the shop as much as he was before - keeps his mouth shut though, 'cause it sounds selfish."

After a pause, Trent blinked. First, it was more than he'd ever heard Dylan say in one sitting, and second, some of this was news to him. All he'd wanted was to see how observant the kid was, and he'd gotten more than he'd bargained for. "Does Clint talk to you about all that?"

"I don't think he talks to anybody about it, but it's pretty obvious to me."

It certainly wasn't obvious to Trent, which only piqued his interest even more. "How about...Jeff?"

Dylan let another mouthful of Mountain Dew slide down his throat. "What about him?"

Trent shrugged. "What do you see?"

"Oh. I guess I see somebody who's got a lot of hurt he doesn't let show. Lots of regrets, even though he's been forgiven. He's mad his body is so weak, but too tired to fight it anymore. And he misses Katie something awful, but doesn't want to pressure her in coming to visit him too often."

Trent grinned and just shook his head. "Boy, you do see a lot. I don't think I'm gonna ask you what you've observed about me."

Dylan smirked a little and threw him a sidelong glance. "You don't need me to tell you what you already know." Standing, he yawned and stretched before chucking his empty pop bottle into a nearby trash barrel. "Besides, any time you want, you can improve your situation. Some people aren't so lucky."

Trent remained seated as he watched Dylan walk away. It was just as well that the boy did leave, since Trent had no idea how to respond anyway. His little test had backfired on him just a bit, as he had not planned on turning anything back to himself. One thing was clear though - Dylan was a very observant, very sharp young man.

Eventually getting up, Trent went back to work, but somehow Dylan's words continued to run through his mind. About him being lucky. Was it true? Did he really have the power to improve his own situation? Was he living with this pain in his heart because he simply refused to change anything? 

Yet

Hope continues to look down at Gunner as he explains what was going on and what he was doing.  She could see the excitement but she could see how good this was not for him as well. It was only feeding everything and letting it interfere or bringing it to work was not a good thing.

   "Huh"

Hope let Gunner finish and his words trail off tell she could tell he could tell she was not amused. This just made her worry grow even more for him. Should she tell Reese? Should she make good on her promise everything was so messed up in this whole situation.

   "Are you going to talk to someone yet?"

Grace can't help but laugh as she helps Jared back into his wheelchair and goes to the back starting to push forward. A smile was pasted on her face and a laugh never ending from her lips. Hearing Jared's last comment Grace leans down close to Jared and gives him a small kiss on the cheek.

   "Oh I am sure we can figure something else out. Just dont go breaking anything else. You have had enough bad luck with that already."

Watching both the boys Alice can't help but rolls her eyes and shaking her head. She missed this, she missed Kyle having his best friend around and the silly bantering. It was good to see the smile on Kyle's face, and the laugh in his voice. She had known he missed Hunter, and now...we at least things could start to get back to how they were.

   "Come on Kate, lets go before lets go and let these boys be. Men!"

Moron

Gunner woke with a start to stare up at Hope with blurry eyes. "Huh?" 

He blinked and tried to get his bearings. Oh yeah...he was at work. Straightening a little more, he looked at his messy desk and tried to recall what on earth he'd been doing and when he must have fallen asleep. "Um...sure. I mean yeah. Found a few new leads." 

He yawned and rubbed an eye with the heel of his hand. "I got a few more things to check then I can start talking to a list of people and see if..." His voice trailed off and he glanced back up at Hope with an expression as if he was a little kid who had been caught with his hand in the cookie jar. 

His shoulders sank back down and his eyes fell to the floor. No matter how enthusiastic he was about this stuff, he still knew it wasn't right, and he knew good and well that Hope would not approve. "You won't...tell Reese or anything...will you?"

"Sounds good to me." Jared nodded, his mind already hard at work trying to decide what on earth they'd have for supper tonight. "Let's say...seven-thirty. That'll give me enough time to make it look like I've been planning this for weeks." 

He grinned as he used Grace's help to get up off the ground and stand wobbly before sinking back down into his wheelchair. He had a few hours to work with - that should be enough, right? 

"Onward!" He pointed to the house, too sore to try and wheel himself at the moment. "What am I gonna do when I'm well, and I can't order you around anymore?" 

Hunter returned a little squeeze to Katie's hand, so grateful for her support. Without her, he certainly wouldn't be here, let alone have gotten straightened out at all. 

When Alice agreed to letting him come to the wedding, he was hit with another wave of relief and gratefulness. Neither she nor Kyle were required to say yes to him coming, but they had. Returning her hug, memories flooded his mind. Memories of Break Out. Memories of being around Alice and becoming close friends. Memories of liking her more than just a friend. Pulling away, he managed a small smile. "Thank you, Alice. And...I'm sorry for being such an idiot. I don't ever want to be that person again." 

Kyle was satisfied. Having received Hunter's apology, then witnessing another apology to Alice...it was another piece of proof that he was at least trying to do the right thing again. He might be a ways from where he needed to be yet, but at least he was on the journey back. And Kyle couldn't ask for any more than that. 

Rejoined by Alice, he slipped his arm over her shoulders and gave her a loving squeeze. They were already making a great team, and he felt so blessed. Life just kept getting better and better. 

Alice's suggestion of having Katie and Hunter stay for dinner raised Kyle's eyebrows. He hadn't really thought of that, but...at this point, he wasn't opposed. If Hunter stuck around for a while, it might be a good chance to observe him a little more. And Kyle always liked spending time with Katie. "Sure, that sounds alright with me."

Hunter's mind had stopped at Alice's invitation. She...had really suggested he and Katie stay? And eat with them? Accepting his apology was one thing. Letting him come to their wedding as Katie's date was another. But actually wanting his company for a meal, after everything he'd done was...something else entirely. A lump rose in his throat, and without warning, he was overcome with emotions. He'd missed this life so much. He'd strayed so far. And yet he was being welcomed back with open arms. 

"The more the merrier." Kyle was still talking. "And yes, we have enough hamburgers for all of us. I'm so hungry, I'm 'bout ready to gnaw off my arm, so-" He stopped abruptly. "Uh-oh." 

Hunter had turned his back on the other three, embarrassed by the tears in his eyes. With hands on hips, he took a deep breath, trying to compose himself, but it wasn't working very well. They were just being too nice to him. 

Kyle cleared his throat. "You done gone and made the poor man cry, Alice. Shame on you. All I wanted was a hamburger, but now we're all feeling awkward, and nobody wants to eat with this going on. I guess we'll just stand here and listen to my stomach growl...before we all starve to death."

"Shut up." Hunter hid his smile as he wiped his eyes. "Jerk."   

Kyle grinned. "Moron." 

"Lard brain." 

"Stupid head." 

Hunter finally had guts enough to turn back around before reaching out and giving Kyle's arm a light punch. Kyle immediately returned a whack upside Hunter's head, to which Hunter thumped his shoulder. Kyle's next move was to shove him towards the patio steps. "To the grill before I really do eat my arm. You flip burgers. I'll watch," he teased. Once on the ground, he glanced back over his shoulder to toss both women a wink. 

Grill

Going out back with Alice Katie didn't  mind at all. It was nice looking around and getting to see everything. This house was amazing, and seeing the Alice and Kyle were fixing it up was even better. They were doing a really good job and it was starting to look amazing. She was so happy for them and they life they were building. It really gave Katie some hope that sooner or later things would work out for her too.

   "I really am excited..."

Stopping what she was saying as Kyle and Hunter come out of the house Katie gives a little smile. Neither man was dead, or cut, or even bruised for that matter. Nor did they look upset or angry, that was a good sign in itself or so Katie thought. She really did want Kyle and Hunter to make up. They were two important people to her and she hated seeing the rift.

As Hunter comes close to her once more Katie reaches her hand out and puts it in his giving it a little squeeze. She was proud of Hunter. No matter the outcome she really was. He was trying she could tell and no one could as for more than that. 

Giving a smile to Kyle and hearing he agreed to let Hunter come to the wedding her smile grows a little more. Maybe things were not perfect with those two but at least this was something, and a start. Alice new people could change and if Hunter was trying than that was good enough for her.

   "Yes, I would be honored to have you there as well Hunter."

Standing for a moment Alice moves around the little table where she had been sitting and extends her arms to Hunter before giving him a hug. They had been though lots, ups, downs, good, and bad times but Hunter had always been and would always be a good friend to her. It had hurt seeing him choose the wrong path but seeing him find his way again made her heart sing.

   "It's good to have you back Hunter."

Moving away from him and going back to Kyle Alice gives him a small hug as well. She was proud of him and it made her that much more honored to be marrying him. Kyle had been strong, but he'd grow stronger in front of her eyes and become even better of a person. Now she only hoped that she could be the kind of wife Kyle needed and deserved.

   "Would you guys like to stay for dinner? I think Kyle is doing a little cookout, and I believe we have extra for you guys as well. Hunter, you can help Kyle and Katie can help me with the sides. That sound ok to you Kyle?"

Grace gives another laugh finishing up with Jared's legs and giving them a pat. Cocking her head at Jared she gives a little nod. He did seem like a take it as it comes kind of guy and though that was not normal for her it kind of in a way felt nice. To not think something out and over thing it, to just do it and see what happened.

   "Right...How about we get you inside than so we can let you mom know the plans. Than I need to go see another pashent, go home and change, and than I will head back over. That sound ok?"

Walking through TJY Hope let out a small sigh to herself. Gunner hadn't shown up yesterday like he said he would and today so far no sign. Looking around the main floor though seeing something stir Hope wondered maybe he was there after all.

Going over to the cubicle and seeing Hunter passed out at his desk with all the papers around him Hope lets out a long sigh and shakes her head. Would this ever stop? Would Gunner ever end this? Giving a knock on the wall with her knuckles Hope takes in a breath.

   "Looks like you had a busy night. Find anything good?"

As long as it's okay...

Gunner paused a moment and looked down at Hope's hand that was on his arm. He'd never noticed how light and caring her touch was before. "I know," he responded quietly. Whether he was thinking straight or not, he knew Hope meant it, and he knew that she could force his hand if need be. She and Con had done it before. And the funny thing was, somewhere deep down, that was a comfort in a strange sort of way.

Turning back to the mess, he let Hope see herself out. And after she'd gone, he continued to clean up. These were documents and records that should have been thrown away long ago. They were things that others would have assumed he'd thrown away the last time he'd tried to get rid of his obsession. But he hadn't. He'd kept them in the back corner of his closet, unbeknownst to anyone else.

Once the mess was back in the box, Gunner knew he should go to work like he'd told Hope he would. But after a shower and getting into clean clothes, the exhaustion was enough to send him to his bed. Lying down in the company of his pillow, he tried to regain some energy. He needed to go to work. He needed to meet Bree for lunch. Yet neither was enough to get him up.

He would call Bree and cancel their plans for today, saying he didn't feel well, but was fine enough that she shouldn't worry. And he would not return to work as planned. Instead, he would sleep a restless sleep, holding himself on the brink of something darker than he wished to think about...

...It was after midnight. Everybody was gone, except Ty and Hal. It would seem unusual for Gunner to come to work at this hour, but for a man who had slept most of the day, being wide awake at home was less than fulfilling. It wasn't Elite work that he was after though - just the use of his computer and records.

And in the morning when others would arrive, he would go relatively unnoticed in his cubicle, having fallen asleep at his desk, surrounded by papers and photos of suspects he'd dug up.

"What? And have you cook your own meal?" Jared smirked as he watched Grace work on his legs again. "I'd say having you over to dinner for the first time is a good enough reason to make sure you don't have to work at all." 

He bit his lip as a new and painful spasm hit his lower back. "I'll, um...think of something," he reasoned." He threw her a coy grin. "That's what I do best, you know. Fly by the seat of my pants." 

Having been roused from a light nap by his phone, Hunter laid on his couch as he answered Katie's call. He couldn't help his surprise. "Wow, really?" He'd been sure Kyle would have turned her down flat. "That's...that's good." 

Right? This was what he wanted, wasn't it? A chance? Now that it was a reality though, a bit of fear surfaced. What if, despite his efforts, Kyle still said no? What if he still wanted nothing to do with Hunter, even if he did try to show he'd changed? And what about Alice? How did she feel? Did she have as much distrust for him as did her fiance? 

Realizing he'd paused the conversation, Hunter cleared his throat. "Um, so yeah, I'd like to go. Thanks for setting it up." He glanced out the window to the afternoon sunshine. "How about I pick you up after work?"

It was a perfect day for a motorcycle ride, providing a good excuse to pick Katie up on his bike. And a few hours after their phone conversation, they were headed just out of town, Hunter quite comfortable with Katie's arms around him...

Kyle sighed and nodded at Alice. "Yeah...yeah, everything is okay, I think." He pocketed his phone and stood to wander over behind her, wrapping his arms around her waist and setting his chin on her shoulder. He gave her a loving squeeze and a light kiss to the cheek. 

"That was Katie. She wants to bring Hunter to the wedding as her date, so...I said he could come out here today and talk." He let Alice go, moving around to see her face. "I hope that's okay with you. I didn't feel comfortable just saying he could come to the wedding. Katie seems to think he's the cat's pajamas, but I'm just not so sure. He's got a lot of talking to do before I'd let him back into our circle of friends..." 

Hunter knew the way to the estate, though it did take a little thinking to take the right roads. It had been many years since he'd been here...with Kyle...as kids...as best friends. There had been many a time he'd been invited to come out here with the family for a grand backyard campout or even birthday parties. It felt like a lifetime ago. 

Arriving at the long driveway, Hunter pulled to a stop and just stared across the rolling lawn. He remembered being impressed as a kid with how neat the place was, but now, to think that this was Kyle and Alice's home...it was rather overwhelming. He could only imagine how they would creatively use the size of the estate for church events and for the band. It was much too big of a house for just two people, but knowing their hearts, Hunter knew that this place would most likely get put to good use. Most couple starting out would have very little - Kyle and Alice had certainly been blessed, that was for sure. And it might take just a bit of doing to not be too jealous. 

Hunter reached back and gave Katie's let a pat before continuing on up the driveway. His nervousness only increased, and he hoped he'd made the right choice by coming. Parking near the garage, he let Katie get off first before dismounting and taking off his helmet. Looking around the place, it felt just a little smaller than it had when he'd been a kid, but it was still big enough to be impressive. "Well..." He looked at Katie, the nervousness showing in his eyes. "Here goes nothing." Taking her hand, he aimed for the walk that led to the front door. 

Inside, Kyle had just sat down to another glass of lemonade, hot and sweaty from having been working outside all day. It was worth it, but he was pretty worn out. "So I was thinking-" His sentence to Alice was cut off by the doorbell. Quirking an eyebrow, he bristled just a little. "And I would imagine that would be our guests." 

Mustering up his gumption, he rose from the kitchen table. Answering the door, his eyes first went to Katie and he smiled. "Hey, K.T." He reached out to tweak her chin teasingly. "Good to see ya." Seeing Hunter's arm around her, on the other hand, did little for his enjoyment. He glanced up at Hunter next, locking eyes with him. At least he was clean shaven and sober this time. "Hunter." 

Hunter swallowed hard. "Hi, Kyle. Thanks for...well, I... um..." 

Kyle stepped back and gestured inside. "Come on in." Following them inside, he hollered ahead to Alice. "Hey, Alice? How about showing Katie around?" He'd just as soon get Hunter alone before being a chummy foursome. 

All Hunter had time for was an awkward nod hello to Alice before he and Kyle were left alone...which was pretty awkward in itself. He hooked his thumbs in his jeans pockets and rocked on his heels nervously. "Um...thanks for letting me come out here." 

"Yeah." Kyle wandered to the living room where he took up a seat in one of the chairs. "Katie said she wants to bring you to the wedding." 

"Right." Hunter eased down on the couch, just sitting on the edge and leaning his elbows on his knees. He studied Kyle's face, seeing distrust written all over it. "She does, and...I'd like it too, but...I'd understand if you said no." 

Kyle remained silent, just looking Hunter over. What had the years done to them? 

Hunter cleared his throat. "Look, Kyle, I'm sorry." The words came out easier than he'd thought they would. "I'm sorry for being a rotten friend when we were with Break Out, I'm sorry for losing touch 'cause I was jealous, and I'm sorry for hitting you the last time we met." He sighed deeply. "And I'm sorry for anything else I forgot to mention." 

Kyle's eyes softened just a little. "Why, Hunter?"

"Why what? Why am I sorry?"

"No. Why did you turn into someone else? What happened?" 

Hunter shrugged lamely, his leather jacket creaking with the movement. "I dunno. I just...guess I lost sight of what was important. I was jealous you got Alice. Then I felt left out and abandoned with Break Out - sorta relived the whole abandonment thing from my dad, I guess. After that, one thing led to another and I just got farther and farther off the right path."

Was he really as repentant as he sounded? Kyle just wasn't sure. "Well, for what it's worth, you look better today than you did the last time I saw you." 

"You mean sober?" Hunter grimaced. "Yeah...I've, um...I've been working on that. Kinda hard to hit the bottle when you got somebody like Katie to pay attention to."

"Oh?" 

"Well, yeah." Hunter blinked, seeing the question on Kyle's face. Then his eyes widened. "But it's nothing...I mean...we're not...I'm..." He stopped and rolled his eyes. "Look, Katie's been good for me, alright? She's helped me get my head on straight again and I think we got something good going. I know you think I'm a jerk, and you're right - I was. But I'm trying really hard not to be and I just..." His sentence trailed off as quite suddenly he was hit with a wave of emotions. His eyes dropped and he took a moment to regain control. "I just want to be friends with you again. I don't have many friends any more since I've been trying to avoid the rough crowd lately and...and I miss my best friend." He shrugged again. "I know your friendship is too much to ask for, but...I figured it was worth a shot." 

Kyle couldn't help it that his heart was touched. He couldn't help but hear the sincerity in Hunter's voice, even if he didn't want to believe it. But was he really ready to let Hunter back into his life? "I'm...sorry things have been so rough for you. I wish I would have known you took the Break Out thing so hard so I could have done things differently. I wish I would have tried harder to stay in touch." 

"Naw, nothing was your fault." 

"Not even Alice?"

"Well..." Hunter looked back up as the first grin came to his lips. "Maybe that was your fault. But it looks like it was meant to be after all. I mean...look at all this..." He chuckled. "Imagine you, having this place, having your own band, getting married...It's like all the pieces just fell into place for you. I gotta admit, I'm still a bit jealous, but it's hard to be bitter when I see how good things are turning out for you." 

Kyle cocked his head. "You really mean that?" 

"Yeah...yeah, I do." 

Another sigh surfaced as Kyle stood. Hunter automatically stood as well, and Kyle gave him a good long look. It was hard to turn someone away when they were obviously trying very hard to repair things they had damaged. And even though Kyle hadn't wanted to believe Katie that Hunter had changed...unless he'd lost all skill for reading people, it was true - Hunter really was trying, and really had changed from the drunk guy who had slugged him. "You gonna cause trouble at my wedding?" 

"No." Hunter shook his head. "And I won't even object when given the chance...'cause any good reason I could come up with would just show what a stupid guy I am." 

Kyle finally grinned. "You're not stupid. You're just a bit of a knucklehead sometimes." 

"Yeah, well...I guess I'm a slow learner."

"Mm-hmm..." Kyle set his hands on his hips and let another pause linger before speaking again. "I accept your apology, Hunter. And...as long as it's okay with Alice, you can come to the wedding." 

Hunter let out the breath he'd been holding. 

"But..." Kyle held up a finger. "Should you cause any trouble at all..."

"I know, I know." Hunter raised his hands in surrender. "You'll kick me in the head and I won't even fight back." 

"I mean it."

Hunter's hands dropped. "I understand. If I were you, I'd be leery too. But I really am gonna try to be a better friend, if you'll let me."

"Oh...I think maybe I can. Come on." Kyle headed for the back door. 

"Where are we going?" 

"I think the girls are out back. You want to say something to Alice, too, don't you?" 

Hunter really hadn't thought about that, but he knew it was only right. He owed Alice as much of an apology as he'd given Kyle, no matter how awkward he felt. "Yeah..." 

Kyle found the girls out on the back patio and offered both a smile. "Hey, you two. Seen all you can see yet?" 

Hunter joined them, choosing to stand rather close to Katie and giving her a look that was something like a cross between sheepishness, relief and awkwardness. 

"Alice..." Kyle set a hand on her shoulder. "I told Hunter he can come to our wedding, as long as it's okay with you." 

Consideration

Hope felt bad for Gunner and wished there was more she could do for him. But this was all she had to offer. She really did want to help him and she wanted to make sure everything was going to be ok. Simply hearing him say he was fine though didn't do it for her.

   "We do want to help you Gunner, thats what we keep saying."

Watching him stand and start to put his papers into boxs Hope comes closer. Taking his arm in her hand for a second she looks at him letting out a small sigh.

   "Talk to someone Gunner, before its to late...ok? We care and want to help. I'll give you a few days but than I am going to have to make a desition."

Grace can't help but laugh again as she shakes her head and leans into Jared a little bit. She loved his sense of humor. He could make her laugh and she liked that.

   "Yes I guess you should huh? I mean it is kind of important."

Shifting again a little bit down to Jared's legs Grace starts working on them all over again. Warming the muscles, cooking them, helping the blood pump once more. This had become something she really did enjoy doing. To know she was helping someone she cared a great deal about. It had its own reward.

   "Or I could always come over a little early and help cook as well."

   "That seems fair enough to me."

Katie taps her fingers on the counter absentmindedly for a second. That was more than she exspected and she was happy that Kyle would least  consider it. Now it was just talking to Hunter and having him go with her to the little farm house. Katie wasn't sure if he would or not. He wanted to show Kyle he'd changed but was this to much?

   "Alright Kyle, we should be out in a few hours. Thank you for considering. I know Hunter will be happy to hear you at least want to try."

Hanging up the phone Katie lets out a long breath she had been holding. Taking her phone in hand again and dialing Hunter's number and waiting for him to answer.

   "Hey you. Called Kyle...he wants us to come out to the house and talk to Alice and him. He wants to know you have changed and are not going to cause trouble. This is a big step to take...but...if you do you might be able to get your friend back."

Once Kyle was off the phone Alice whiper her hands off on a towel and cocked her head at him. She new he was on the phone with someone and it was about Hunter but that was about she wasn't sure at all. She was intrusted in what was going on.

   "Hey, did I hear right you said something about Hunter? Is everything ok?" 

So Tired

Gunner continued to stare at the paper on the wall as if not even hearing Hope. His body language, though, indicated that he did hear her, and her words did register. Though his eyes remained on the paper, his weight shifted nervously from one foot to the other, and his fingers strummed erratic beats on his leg.

"How can a man let someone in on his nightmare?" he questioned softly. "When you're asleep, how do you invite someone else in to see what you see, and feel what you feel?"

His eyes finally dropped, as did his shoulders. "I'm so tired." 

Wandering back to where he'd started, he sank back down to the floor, leaning back against the wall. His gaze landed on nothingness. He didn't want to go back to Northside. He knew Hope was only trying to help. But he was so confused. His mind and body were exhausted, but the battle just wouldn't stop. He wasn't even sure why he was doing what he was doing anymore.

"I don't understand." His voice became passive and listless again. "It's over...it's all over. But I gotta keep looking." Unexpected tears pooled in his eyes. "My entire childhood was stolen from me...all of my memories of any family or friends...just...gone. And no one cares about finding the truth, except me." 

If anyone suspected it, now it was known for sure - he was caught on the same merry-go-round he had been before. It was back to the accident all over again. 

Straightening, he got onto his hands and knees, and started picking up some of the papers that were scattered around. "I'm sorry," he apologized clearly, as if none of this had just happened. "I'll get this cleaned up and go in to work this afternoon." He grabbed the box he'd emptied earlier and began throwing papers into it. "I appreciate you stopping by, but I'm okay now."

Though Jared was thrilled at Grace's acceptance of his invitation, his cheeks gained some color and he couldn't help a sheepish laugh. "Well, I, um...I just thought of asking you like two minutes ago, so...I haven't exactly thought yet about what to eat, let alone who's gonna cook it."

Glancing down at her, he gave her a silly look. "I suppose since you said yes, I better start thinking about it, huh?" 

Kyle continued his slow walk to the house, but stopped before entering the back door. Hearing Katie's request, he immediately bristled. He'd known she was dating Hunter, and since the beginning could not believe Katie could be that stupid. He'd held his tongue though, never interfering and just hoping she would not be taken advantage of. And now she wanted to bring Hunter to his wedding...of all occasions. 

Slowly entering the house, he sighed deeply as he wiped his feet on the rug. "I don't know, Katie..." Finding Alice near the kitchen, he threw her a glance that said he was not happy with whoever he was talking to. 

He sank down in a kitchen chair and ran a hand over his face, trying to sort it through in his mind. He was torn between forgiveness and facts. "I'm not so sure that showing up at my wedding is a good place for him to prove whether he's actually changed or not." The last thing he wanted was for Hunter to show up and cause a scene at his wedding. 

"I trust you, but I gotta be honest - I don't trust him or his motives." Another look was tossed at Alice as he talked. What was he supposed to say? He loved Katie to death, but why was she doing this to him? 

"Tell you what...Alice and I are gonna be here at the house the rest of the day. If Hunter wants to come with you to the wedding, tell him he can come out here and tell me to my face. Otherwise, I just can't trust he won't cause trouble."

You need...

Standing with Gunner Hope didn't like his response to her at all. Seeing him like this, this different than a few days ago worried her and upset her at the same time. He seemed more crazy babbling than just straight up crazy this time around. It made hope sad, and she felt so hopeless. She new he didn't want to go back to Northside but if he was going to keep acting like this and not filling anyone in than thats what was going to happen.

   "It's talk like that Gunner that wont even let me give you a choose so how about we not even go there ok."

Hope walked over the papers and twords Gunner again she tried to keep her eyes soft, but stern to show she really meant what she was talking about.

   "We dont let you be because we care and are worried about you. You need to talk to me, Rick, Bree, JT you need to talk to someone Gunner before we do send you back. I know you dont want to so you need to help me help you.  We might even be able to help you if you let me in."

He needed to talk to someone. She didn't much care who but someone who could help him. He needed to get this stuff off his chest, and just talk about it. To empty his mind and just let someone else help him carry the weight.

Having Jared's fingers locked with hers Grace couldn't help the smile on her lips. His touch was warm and his hands were soft, his touch light. She enjoyed it because though it was soft, it was still strong and it made her feel safe. Even if Jared wouldn't think so because of his legs she still felt that way.

   "Dinner tomorrow...I'd love too. Are you going to do the cooking or your mom? Either way I bet you are both good cooks."

Katie smiles at Kyles greeting. He was always so happy to see her and she had been silly to think he didn't have time to talk to her. She just new he was busy with wedding stuff and the new house she just didn't want to take him away from what needed to be done.

   "Well it was kind of about your wedding. You know I am coming and I wanted to bring my pluse one but I wanted to make sure it was ok with you guys first."

Katie lets out a long breath before continuing on. Katie didn't know why she felt so nervous but she was. The worst he could say was no but at the same time it would really put a pain in her heart. 

   "I wanted to know if I could bring Hunter. He really miss you Kyle and he's changed a lot and leaned into God more. I know he's don't lots of wrong Kyle...but we all have and he just wanted a way to make things right."

Ten Seconds

Gunner only made eye contact with Hope when she leaned down to his level. Locking his gaze with hers, he listened, though his expression didn't change.

"No." His eyes narrowed with his stubborn response. Standing so abruptly that he almost tripped over a pile of papers, he put more space between him and Hope. "I'm never going back to that place." His tone had grown angry. "And if you or anybody else try to make me, I'll go walk off a bridge instead, and we can just be done with this whole thing." 

There was fear in his eyes now. Fear of going back to the place of forced counseling, psychiatric evaluations, medications and locked doors. Perhaps there had been some good in it - he'd been forced to face his problems and give up the notion of suicide, while also getting to know Bree. But he never wanted to go back.

Pacing like a caged animal in front of the living room window, Gunner scuffed his bare feet on the carpet. He folded his arms tight around himself and wouldn't look back at Hope again. "What is so wrong with just letting me be? Why can't I just...just..." He gestured at the mess on the floor, but found it difficult to say what he wanted. "Just do what I'm doing?"

He spotted a particular piece of paper on the floor and snatched it up. "See? A loose end. But nobody lets me wrap them all up." His voice went quiet again. "Nobody." He found a pushpin on the coffee table and pinned the paper to the wall, next to a couple others that he'd already put up. Quiet abruptly, his body language shifted, putting him in his own little world again, as if Hope wasn't even there. "If I could just find the missing piece," he whispered, while staring at the page. "If I could just...find it..."

Jared grinned as he looked at Grace out of the corner of his eye. Sliding his hand towards her, he took her hand, running his thumb through her palm. "Is this what you call working hard?" he teased softly.

He leaned his head against hers and just soaked up the sunshine and the gentle breeze. Closing his eyes, he sighed deeply. Was this what peace felt like?

"You wouldn't want to come over for dinner tomorrow night, would you?"

"Hey, KT!" Kyle set down his paint brush and wiped his hand on his jeans. Hearing Katie's question, his brow furrowed a little. Katie didn't usually start out conversations like this. "I always got at least ten seconds for you," he teased. He wandered in the direction of the house's back door, but kept his steps slow. He knew Alice was inside doing some cleaning, but he wanted to hear what Katie had to say first, before involving Alice. 

"So what's up?"

Or Else

Looking at Gunner and listing to him Hope can't help but shake her head at his gibberish. He was sounding completely insane or disoriented or something. Hope wasn't sure what but she new it wasn't good and it worried her.

   "Gunner...what is this all about?"

Not hearing a reply Hope steps into the room and around to the front of Gunner bending down to be level with him. Cocking her head she trys to look him in the eye and lets out a sigh. This whole being nice thing was not working out, not with Gunner and if Hope didn't do something...she didn't want to think about that.

   "You need to talk to me. This is not an option anymore because every day I see you, your sleeping away a little more. You need to talk to me Gunner or your going back to Northside and they will make you talk."

Continuing to work on Jared's legs Grace gives a small nod listent to what the Dr had talked to him about. In a way it really was one big circle but it was the slow work they were doing that was helping and making everything come into place.

   "Yes you did and that's worth it. I am very proud of you for that."

Finishing up with Jared's legs Hope stops and scoots back to lean against the tree. Leaning her head on Jared's shoulder she she smile at him. She loved spending this time with him and just being here.

   "So...I was thinking maybe we could go on a real date some time soon. Maybe dinner and a movie?"

 Finishing up with Gunner and heading back to work Katie thinks about there whole afternoon. It had been a nice one, it always was. Katie enjoyed her time with Hunter and talking a little bit about Kyle was nice too. Kyle...thats right she needed to call him.

Pulling out her phone once she pulled into TJY Katie dials Kyle's number and waits for him to answer. Hearing his voice she can't help but smile. Kyle would always be special to her, he was one of her close friends now and always.

   "Heya Kyle. Do you have a second to chat? I wanted to ask you something kinda important. Well you and Alice."

Missing Puzzle Pieces

Gunner's ears heard the knock at the door, but somehow the sound just didn't register in his brain as anything he needed to pay attention to. He also heard someone's footsteps, but made no move to get up and see who it was - friend or foe.

Only after Hope said something did Gunner's mind focus enough to realize who it was, and that she was standing right here in his living room with him. Even so, his eyes didn't move, as if his senses had grown too sluggish to react.

He shrugged at her question. "I guess." His gaze remained in a stare, not really focusing on all the scattered papers. There was a lot of information here. And all had been read by him over and over, countless times. What should have been burned was now at the surface again, being studied and dissected once more. The case of his family's car accident. All of the trails he'd been on. All the leads. All the dead ends. It was all right here. Yet instead of reading them closely, they looked liked a puzzle that had been dumped in a pile with no rhyme or reason. And he sat on the edge. Just watching.

He swallowed hard and let his head lean back against the wall. "Missing puzzle pieces are never really lost," he commented quietly. "Just...misplaced. That's all. They still exist. Somewhere. You just have to find them...to make it all fit... Somewhere." His eyes never left the mess. "The piece is just misplaced... But it's here... somewhere."

Sitting in the grass felt nice, and Jared was glad Grace had suggested going outside. Even the sun was out, and that felt good too. He'd wanted to stay locked inside for so long, but maybe being outside wasn't such a bad idea after all.

Leaned back against a tree, he watched Grace work. She made it look easy, her hands seeming to know exactly what to do. It still hurt sometimes, but even so, he was starting to realize that it was all part of the process, and she was only helping him.

He scrunched his nose at her question. "Eh... kind of. I was talking to the doctor the other day and complaining that things weren't going faster. He explained I'm dealing with muscles that weren't used for a while so they need work, but also nerves that are healing and that's why I can't control much movement yet." He knew Grace already knew all that, but repeating it helped him process the information. "Kinda feels like a vicious cycle... Damaged nerves hinder movement, but without movement, my muscles don't get strong." He sighed, but managed a wry grin. "Guess that doesn't really answer your question though, does it?"

Without warning, he flinched, wincing at the pain in his lower back and leg that Grace was working on. He bit his tongue from complaining though - he knew from experience that griping just made her dig deeper. "I suppose I feel a little stronger," he admitted after the pain subsided. "I mean, I made it to the door today without falling on my face, so that's an improvement."

"Well, duh." Hunter grinned and gave Katie's hand a teasing tug. "If I didn't go out with you, I'd just go get myself in trouble, you know that." 

How true that would have been, not all that long ago. Of course, at the moment, there was still a little bit of truth. He hadn't done anything crazy since getting back from Texas, but the temptations were still there - some days stronger than others. But having Katie around helped keep him in check, especially when they had evening dates. Avoiding the bar scene wasn't easy, even though he'd been dry for a short while now. Getting together with Katie guaranteed a clean evening.

Their food being brought interrupted the conversation, and Hunter let Katie's hand go to sit back and make room on the table. A short prayer preceded the meal - a habit Hunter was trying to get back into, though still often forgot. 

Talk was kept light while eating, but the back of his mind continued to think about Kyle. Would Katie really call him? What would Kyle say? Hunter deserved the worst. Would Kyle forgive or turn him away? Yes, he was a good guy, but Hunter had displayed despicable behavior...more than once. And then, there was Alice. Maybe she wouldn't want him at the wedding either. She had just as much reason to keep him away. Even if Kyle forgave him, if Alice didn't want him at the wedding, Kyle could still say no. And then...it wasn't so much about the wedding...Hunter simply had a hole in his heart where his best friend used to be. And he missed him.

Collection

Hearing that Gunner had called in Hope frowns a little bit. That was odd that he would call in. After all it was not like Gunner at all to do that. Hope lets out a small sigh and wonders if this is connected with everything else.

   "Ok Reese thanks for letting me know."

Once everything was quiet again Hope sits back running a finger along her lips. Sitting forward again and picking up the phone Hope dials Gunner's number waiting for someone to answer. Not getting anything it made Hope a little worried. She couldn't hold this off any longer, for Gunner's sake.

...It wasn't to much longer that Hope was outside Gunner's place. She would come and see him if he wasn't coming into work, and if he wouldn't answer the phone. Giving a knock on the door Hope waits till no one answers. Knocking and trying the handle again it opens and Hope steps inside making her way down the hall and to a door that was open.

Seeing papers and pictures on the floor through the crack Hope pushes it open a little more seeing Gunner. Looking around at everything he had quite the collection. Hope would definitely say this was borderline obsession and it made her worry.

   "This is quite the collection Gunner. This why you didn't come into work?"

Grace can't help the laugh that escapes her lips. Jared's humor would always do that to her. Even if at times it was kind of dry she did understand it and it did make her laugh slightly anyways. Maybe it was that feeling in her stomach that said she cared that did that to her.

   "Alright outside it is than."

Gathering everything and helping Jared outside Grace gets to work on his legs with the heat and ice like so many times before. Once done with that Grace takes his one leg and starts to move it helping him with his muscles.

   "So...how have you been feeling? Feel like your legs are getting stronger?"

Searching Hunter's eyes Katie can see a small spark of hope in Hunter's eyes that was masked with pain still. She would talk to Kyle as see if she could work something out. Maybe if Kyle new Hunter was sorry and changed maybe they could be friend again and things would be ok.

   "Ok, when our lunch is done than I will call him and see about talking to him. If he knows you changed I think he might forgive you. Kyle is pretty level headed."

Reaching across the table and taking Hunter's had Katie gives a small smile to him. They had been spending a good amount of time together as of late Katie was enjoying it. Hunter was doing so well since he got back and she was so proud of him.

   "So we still on for tonight?"

Mess

"Right. Okay. See you later then." Gunner scratched his head and yawned again as he watched Bree disappear down the hall. Something felt weird today. Uneasy. Off kilter.

Shrugging it off, he hunted for his sneakers and gathered up his jacket and keys to leave. Since he hadn't brought anything to stay overnight, he needed to go to his apartment first. Take a shower. Change clothes. Go to work. What time was he supposed to be there anyway?

In the end, it wouldn't matter. After getting home, there was no shower. No changing clothes. Only a call in to work...


"Susanne?" Reese held down the intercom button on his office phone. "Anything from Gunner this morning?"

"Whoops, sorry. He called in sick earlier. I forgot to mention it."

"Oh...did he say what was wrong?"

"No. He just said to let you know he called."

"Did he sound alright?"

"Well, I don't know. I mean, he seemed kinda out of it, but he didn't sound like he was on death's door. Is everything okay?"

"Uh, yeah...thanks." Reese ended the call and leaned back in his chair to think. It was Hope's office he buzzed next. "Hey, Hope? First, I apologize for being in such a rotten mood yesterday. It was as bad day, but that's no excuse. Second, and on the same lines, just in case you didn't know, Gunner called in sick this morning. I just thought...maybe that was something you'd want to be aware of." 


...In Gunner's apartment, odor from a burnt breakfast still lingered in the air, charred remains of forgotten toast still sitting on the kitchen counter. A faint beeping could be heard coming from down the short hallway where the phone was off the hook and stuffed under a pillow to hide the sound. Also under the pillow was Gunner's cell phone, even though it had been turned off. It was nearing noon, but food, let alone a lunch date, had been completely forgotten.

There was silence.

The living room floor was haphazardly plastered with photos, papers, folders and more. One might think someone had taken an entire filing box and simply dumped it out. Off to the side, Gunner sat. He hadn't changed out of his jeans and t-shirt, although now he was in his bare feet. Sitting cross-legged, he was leaned back against the wall, simply staring at the mess.


"Um..." Jared thought as he tried to walk slowly beside Grace, using her for support. "Going outside sounds rather appealing. I haven't been outside since walking from the car to the house when I came home from the hospital."

He paused their walk to regain some balance before he glanced down at her with a teasing little grin. "Besides...if we go outside, that means I need more help. And if I need more help, that means I can keep my arm around you like this a little longer." 


Kyle paused mid-stroke with his paintbrush to throw Alice a smile. After setting down the bucket and brush, he wandered to the picnic table to take a long swig of lemonade and smacked his lips in approval. 

Hearing her comment about time, he laughed. "You kidding me?" Taking both her hands, he pulled her into a bear hug and kissed the top of her head. "If life slowed down, we wouldn't know what to do with ourselves. With us getting hitched and the band taking off, time is gonna fly right on by." He withdrew a little to set a finger under her chin and tilt her face up. "But fast or slow, as long as I'm with you, it's a little piece of heaven." 

Only after he'd given her a warm kiss on the lips did he finally let her go to study their lunch. "Mm-mmm... yessiree... The only bad thing about us living here is we got room for the band to be over here lots. And that means me sharing some of your cooking, an I'm not so sure I'm gonna be good at that." 


Hunter studied Katie's eyes for a few moments before he shrugged. "I dunno. I mean, I want to go. I want to see Kyle again and make things right, I just...I don't know if he'll ever forgive me for being the jerk I was. I know I don't deserve having him as a friend anymore, it just...feels unfinished." 

He looked down at the wrapper he was toying with. "And I don't want you and me to cause trouble between you and Kyle either. I know you're good friends, and I'm glad...I just don't want you going to bat for me if that means it'll mess things up with you guys." He shrugged again. "So I guess if you wanna talk to him, that's okay with me, but it should probably just be you. And if he says no, I'd rather you just let it go and go to the wedding and enjoy it. I made some bad choices and I gotta live with the consequences." If there was any way Kyle would let him come to the wedding, Hunter would be thrilled. A little scared, but thrilled nonetheless. Unfortunately, it was a long shot. But if Katie wanted to talk to Kyle, Hunter wouldn't stop her. 

He slid his hand across the table to curl around Katie's fingers. "Thanks for trying though. It means a lot to me."